Quote of the Week -



A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.




1. George: "He's my big brother, I'd do anything for him." (Bluestar)
2. Brenna (to Beth): "By the way, you're wrong. About not being part of this family. You're here for breakfast, lunch, dinner, cancer, funerals..." (Bluestar)
3. April: "It's weird. Death used to be my greatest fear." (Bluestar)








1. Gates: "Look, if she offers you a glass of water, just say no, okay?" (Bluestar)
2. Noma: "Crazy how a part of you can hurt so much even after it's gone." (Bluestar)
3. Michael: "Alex is the last pure heart. He will heal." The Prophet: "Hmm, he's human. There's light and darkness in all of them. None of them are pure. You, of all the angels, should know that." (Bluestar)
4. Michael: "We called him the Son of Morning, my older brother, Lucifer. He's alive." (Bluestar)







Captain Chandler to Dr. Scott: "Be safe. And when you get back, find me." (Jimmy Ryan)

With 39 shows premiering this week alone, it's a particularly brutal time for pilots. To survive the onslaught, these newbies will have to create buzz and grab viewers quickly or fade into early cancellation. Rosewood, which debuts on Wednesday, Sept. 23, has a few elements in its favor. First, it airs right before Empire's season 2 premiere. With Empire taking TV by storm last year and expectations high for its new season, Rosewood has a prime spot on the schedule without a whole lot of competition for its target demo. It also boasts an impressively diverse cast. Still the bulk of the show's future rests on its lead, Morris Chestnut. Chestnut, who gained fame through movies like Boyz n the Hood, The Game Plan, and recently The Best Man Holiday, has also had secondary TV roles in V, American Horror Story, and Nurse Jackie. Rosewood is his first leading role and the show is largely resting on his natural charisma to bring in viewers. It's a tough job because the story itself has little to offer in terms of ingenuity or surprise. While not a bad show in the least, it is a fairly typical one that likely won't generate much buzz on its own mostly because there is little to distinguish it from a myriad of other procedural cop shows. Rosewood is yet another series with a non-cop specialist partnered with a detective of the opposite sex, which will likely end in the two partners hooking up at some point. If it lasts that long, that is.


Opening with eye candy, a shirtless Dr. Beaumont Rosewood, Jr. runs along the Miami coastline. It is immediately clear that he has heart issues given the huge scar down his torso and the thudding heartbeat that drowns out the background music. He's also incredibly smart. Jogging past a crime scene, he clears a prostitute of murder, declares the "murder" a suicide, and ticks off the lead detective all in under one minute. Like many before him (House, Bones, The Mentalist, Monk) Rosewood is the foremost leader in his field, which in this case is pathology. Unlike these though, he also has a personality that lets him be part of the human race. He remembers birthdays, shakes hands, and oozes more charm than a politician in campaign season. It's an easygoing if over the top allure that sucks most people in…except Dr. Grayson, his mentor played by Clancy Brown. Grayson hates that Rosewood has gone into private pathology with an emphasis on technology instead of staying with the medical examiner's office and using his instincts. He does need Rosewood though to perform an autopsy on his niece, who died in a car crash when her speeding SVU drove off the highway and into the ocean. Grayson thinks it's suspicious given that she hated driving and avoided all major highways. Rosewood agrees to take the case and after an extremely short examination, he agrees with Grayson and heads to the police station to inform them that Nora's death was no accident. The lead detective kicks him over to Detective Annalise Villa, newly returned to Miami from NYC. Not impressed by Rosewood's charms, Villa attempts to leave him behind at every junction in the case which takes them to the young elite of Miami. The case is nothing special but Villa is another tough, capable cop along the lines of Kate Beckett in Castle. She takes down criminals like a pro and doesn't care about blurring the lines to get the information she needs. In one of the best scenes, she prays for the suspect while holding him down and threatening him.


All in all, Rosewood is indistinguishable from all the other crime procedurals out there that rely on the chemistry between its two leads to survive. It will live or die on how charming viewers find Chestnut. While he is more than capable in the role, I don't think it will be enough to create the kind of loyal following the show will need to get to season 2 unless it can find some way to distinguish itself from the rest of the field quickly. They have a start by giving Rosewood actual people skills instead of hiding him behind his specialty or making him too much of a douche. His confidence does cross the line into obnoxious sometimes but that is easily remedied by toning him down around females and playing up potential bromances. Mostly Rosewood is for fans of shows like Castle, Bones, and The Mentalist - those who focus on shipping elements the most - or those whose favorite procedural has ended and are looking for another case of the week cop show.


Grade: C

Audience - shippers who like procedurals and a decent dose of eye candy
TV Formula - Castle's setup + Bones' science/tech + House's genius + actual people skills = Rosewood

Best Reason to Watch - Chestnut oozes charm and some scenes will make you laugh
Best Character - Villa
Best Character Interaction - Rosewood and Grayson
Best Scene - Villa interrogates Juju
Least Surprising - Villa's husband…
Least Likely to Hold Up in Court - everything on the boat
MVP - the music
Best Eye Candy - Morris Chestnut running shirtless, scar or not
Biggest Cliché - yet another non-cop solving crimes with a police detective, most likely to hook up by season one's finale because there's no way they let a male and female partnership remain platonic
Most Original - records made……
The "It's a Fine Line" Award - between charming and smugly overbearing. Rosewood walks that line pretty tightly in the pilot but he's one toe away from becoming the arrogant, obnoxious genius that I hate in other shows.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Clancy Brown (the beloved Corbin on Sleepy Hollow) and Morris Chestnut (originally from Boyz in the Hood and recently from Legends, Nurse Jackie, American Horror Story, and V)


Quotes -

"Be honest. Did you kill Juju?""No but we bonded in a meaningful way.""I don't want to know what that means…"
"Detective Willard, long time no see. How's the wife and kids?""They hate me and I hate you."
"Don't get yourself killed while catching the bad guy tonight."
"Hair and nail growth after death is normal. Color change after death is super weird."
"How do we feel about a 9 year old working the grill?""I feel great. Better her than me."
"How was the workout? I'm exhausted."
"It's all good but let's not forget, Nora. She lost her life. Always remind yourself that each day's a gift. It'll help you on your path to being a better man and less of a jacka**."
"It's undeniable. We make a great team."
"She's at pole dancing class getting ready for our honeymoon.""Oh, I really didn't need to know that.""Me either.""Haters to my left and my right. Just saying."
"So yes, I have a unique relationship with death but it has never been my obsession. My obsession is with every breath I take."
"Stop smelling the suspect."
"You need help from a pro.""Say amen. Don't disrespect the Lord.""Amen. Okay, amen.""Now you're gonna tell me everything you know. Otherwise I'm gonna drag you back to the Jacuzzi and baptize your shifty a** in a very un-Christian sort of way. Now you want to start talking."






Screencaps from FOX and looplr.

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.



The Big Bang Theory -
1. Sheldon: "When last we spoke, you said you needed time." Amy: "It's only been 11 hours." Sheldon: "The Lord of the Rings trilogy was nearly 11 hours. I made you watch that. You said it was an eternity." (Dahne)
2. Howard: "I'm not saying anything bad. Just that she was in love with her captor and somehow managed to escape from his dark and crazy dungeon." (Dahne)
3. Sheldon: "It's over for me. I'm done with women. Like when I swore off Pop Rocks. They both hurt you on purpose." (Dahne)



Blindspot -
1. Jane: "Someone did this to me. Took away my whole life and I can't do anything about it." (Nirat Anop)
2. Dr. Borden: "You're not helpless. We're defined by our choices. You just don't remember yours. So keep trying new things. See what your body remembers or make new choices. The more you make the less helpless you'll feel. Even if nothing ever comes back, you can still find yourself." (Dahne)
3. Doe: "How did you know that I could make that shot?" Weller: "I didn't know. I took a chance on you." (Dahne)
4. Mayfair: "And she'll never get her memory back?" Doctor: "Honestly we have never had a case like this before and when I say 'we' I mean the entirety of medical science." (Dahne)



Doctor Who -
1. Davros: “We have exhausted the conventional means of communication.” (Nirat Anop)
2. Davros: “Pity I had hoped to see the sun for one last time, with my true eyes.” (Nirat Anop)
3. Davros: "Did I do right, Doctor? Tell me. Was I right? I need to know, before the end. Am I a good man?" (Nirat Anop)
4. Doctor Who: "Admit it. You've all had this exact nightmare." ~The Doctor enters in Davros' Dalek chair. (Prpleight)



Dominion -
1. David: "May we be in Heaven a half hour before the Devil knows we're dead." (Blue Star)
2. Claire: "Why am I not surprised the cockroach survived in the dark?" (Blue Star)
3. Gabriel: "The universe is rather vast. I've searched but never found its end. It's a magnificent thing but daunting in its breadth. And yet, never once have I felt alone...until now." (Blue Star)



Empire -
1. Cookie: " Why are you over there crying like Tammy Faye Baker?" (Ben L and Dahne)
2. Jamal: " You need to go visit that man." Cookie: "Did ya'll bother to tell him that when I was rotting away?" (Ben L)
3. Cookie: “Why don’t you take your little sweater off so she can see your sexy body?” (Nirat Anop)
4. Becky: "You're rude, he's crude, and the both of you all are socially unacceptable. You need to fix this." (Dahne)
5. Frank: "Cookie's a snitch. She rat me to the Feds. That's how she got out so early. Now we both know I've got to do something about that. This is between me and Cookie. Me and you are cool unless you tell me something different." Lucious: "Yeah, we're good." Frank: "Cold-blooded. That's why I always liked you." Lucious: "Always like you too but I love Cookie and if you've got war with her then you've got war with me." Frank: "Wow, you are crazy. Crazier than I thought. Kill him. Make it fast and quiet. Bye." Lucious: "I'm sorry. I think you're confused. Now please sit down. See Frankie, you always wanted to run the streets but me, I wanted to rule the world." (Dahne)



Fresh Off the Boat -
1. Eddie: "These guys aren't rappers." Jessica: "They were the gangsters of the sales bin." (Dahne)
2. Louis: "Your job is a vacation…from poverty." (Dahne)
3. Louis: "You're watching out for us so I don't have to. I can be me 'cause I have you." (Dahne)



The Goldbergs -
1. Erica: "Thank you for staying. It was pretty cool of you." Beverly: "Look, I know I got carried away with Lainey. It's just I loved having someone who was willing to listen. Someone who's not always pushing me away." Erica: "And I know you love us more than anything and we appreciate it. We really do." Beverly: "So maybe you won't push me away as much." Erica: "It depends on if you won't get carried away so much." Beverly: "Yeah, both aren't gonna happen." Erica: "For now." (Dahne)
2. Murray: "I'm sorry, Adam. I can't afford your love. It's too pricey." (Dahne)
3. Beverly: "What did I tell you about Tom Cruise-ing the floor? It's incredibly risky." (Dahne)



Grey's Anatomy -
1. Maggie: "You wanna know why bullies bully? It's 'cause they can. Maybe you've got it worse at home or maybe you're just bullying to keep from getting bullied, but really, it's because people like me, like this girl at our table, are alone and small and vulnerable. And pushing us around makes you feel better about your sad pathetic little lives. Not you guys, though. You're cool. Now.” (Nirat Anop)
2. Bailey: "This is not a stepping stone for me. I believe in this hospital and what it can do, and I want to push this bucket of boats to do the most impossible things you have ever seen, and then I'll do more. Because this is my challenge. …This job is made for me. …This job belongs to me. …I've earned first chair. …And every single one of you already knows it." (Nirat Anop)
3. Jess’ Dad: "I don't care if she's gay. I care if she's loved. I care if she's happy, and that is what you should care about. What is wrong with you that you don't?" (Nirat Anop)



Heroes Reborn -
1. Luke: "Well, that is one superior brand of drywall." (Laura Markus and Dahne)
2. Emily: "Okay, let's start this interview for real. Can you scoop ice-cream?" Tommy: "Uh...yeah?" Emily: "Congratulations, you're hired!" (Laura Markus)
3. Luke: “The future? That’s a good one. On June 13th, my wife and I - we brought our 9-year-old son Dennis to Odessa to watch history being made. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining. The summer heat was rising up off the ground. Like everyone there, we believed in the cause. We believed that the change could come from that spot right then and there. And then, when I watched my boy die in my arms, I realized that that just wasn’t gonna happen. You all seem like really nice folks. You can’t change who you are, what you are. But these powers, they’re not natural. They’re not safe, and they cannot be trusted. So, as far as I’m concerned, there’s only one solution for that.” (Laura Markus)
4. Noah: "I think it's a scarecrow to keep people out." Quentin: "You think? Shouldn't we be certain where deadly toxins are concerned?" (Dahne)
5. Mystery Woman: "Unless you earn it, money always comes with strings attached." (Dahne)



How to Get Away with Murder -
1. Eve: "I lied. I think about you every day." (Laura Markus)
2. Connor: "I'm moving in. You're worried about how serious I am about us. Well, here's how serious I am, because right now, you are the only part of my day that I look forward to. [...] Ollie, it's done. Okay? I'm already subletting my place. So, deal with it. We are officially a boring, domesticated, cohabitating couple." (Laura Markus)
3. Connor: "I really wanna be here. More than anything." (Laura Markus)
4. Frank: "Where are you going?" Annalise: "To get us a murder case that didn't happen in this house." (Daniel van der Veer and Dahne)
5. Michaela: "You do realize I'm not scared to hit a b**." Laurel: "Or just throw me down the stairs. You did a pretty good job with Sam." (Daniel van der Veer)
6. Michaela: "Where the hell is she taking us?" Laurel: "I think the point is that we don't know." Connor: "Or she's just about to off us." Annalise: "You'd get no warning if I was going to off you, Mr. Walsh. You've all been through hell. So have I. It's a miracle we're still standing. Tonight we're going to forget about all of that." (Dahne)
7. Frank: "It's freaking Lord of the Flies out there." (Dahne)



Life in Pieces -
1. Colleen: "Okay, looks like I've got wine or wine and I also have wine." Matt: "Okay, beer sounds good." Colleen: "Wine it is." (Dahne)
2. Tyler: "Oh, I don't think I want to hear this story." (Dahne)
3. Joan: "Oh honey, no. We still have plenty of time left. 70 is the new 80." (Dahne)



Limitless -
1. Eddie: "You think it's bad now, it's only gonna get worse. You actually might remember this moment as the last time you felt vaguely human." (Laura Markus and Darth Locke)
2. Rebecca: "If Brian's gonna take NZT anyway, then every time he takes it he basically becomes the smartest person in the world. That's a resource. Let's make it our resource!" (Laura Markus)
3. Rebecca: "I couldn't help my father. Maybe I can help you." (Laura Markus and Darth Locke)
4. Brian: "Your brain is a miracle, but it’s not efficient. There’s a maze inside everyone’s head, a labyrinth of missed connections and untapped potential. But now suddenly, I had access to every single brain cell.” (Nirat Anop and Darth Locke)
5. Eddie: “Your on the verge of having a life most people can’t even begin to imagine. Can you remember what’s it’s like to be inside your mother's womb? I can, I think about it when I need to relax. Have you ever thought about why people have to age? Is it inevitable? I’m not sure.” (Nirat Anop)
6. Brian: “It doesn’t look like there's a fast way out here, but what if suddenly you knew how much strength you had in your hands. I mean exactly how much. Down to the moment, the last muscle fiber would give." (Nirat Anop)
7. Brian Finch: "Hi, my name is Brian Finch and the first thing you should know about me is I didn't do anything wrong." (Ben L)
8. Harris: "You think I'm impressed that you can stomp around in my life? You're not smart. You're high." (Dahne)
9. Eli: "Yeah I know. Twenty year old me would punch 28 year old me in the face." (Dahne)
10. Harris: "If you hand me my gun right now I probably won't shoot you." (Dahne)



The Mindy Project -
1. Mindy: "Danny, listen to my great idea. We should name the baby after a classic movie character, like Indiana or Wall-E." (Ben L)
2. Tamra: "Oh, my God! A subway baby? You're gonna be on "The Ellen Show!" Sheena was in the audience once, and she got some Omaha steaks and a pair of Tom's." (Ben L)
3. Mindy: "I love you, Leo Castellano." (Ben L)



Minority Report -
1. Wally: "They covered it all up after the program fell. Wanted so badly for their precogs to be perfect. They never could accept one little inconvenient truth." Vega: "What truth?" Dash: "For PreCrime to work, the public needed to believe that the murders we saw were destiny. That people couldn't change their futures." Wally: "The dirty secret was, that even the three precogs didn't always see the future in the same way. Outlier visions." Dash: "They were filed in minority reports." (Darth Locke)
2. Blake: "I would have closed him differently but okay." ~after the suspect gets himself impaled to death (Dahne)
3. Vega: "Are you familiar with the concept of a whisper?" (Dahne)
4. Arthur: "You brought a friend. Maybe I underestimated my little brother." Vega: "Little? I thought you were twins." Dash: "Older by 7 minutes." Arthur: "Dash was afraid to come out." Dash: "I finally had some peace and quiet." (Dahne)



The Muppets -
1. Sam the Eagle: “The following inappropriate words need to be deleted from tonight's script. Crotchety, twiddle and gesticulate.” Kermit: “Gesticulate, well that, that just means to move your hands.” Sam the Eagle: “Which leads to shaking hands, which is the first step in making babies. Not on my watch!” (Nirat Anop)
2. Kermit: "My life is a bacon-wrapped hell." Sam: "Can't say hell." (Nirat Anop and Dahne)
3. Fozzie: "When your online profile says you're a passionate bear looking for love, you get a lot of wrong responses." (Nirat Anop)
4. Piggy: "And the lilacs in my dressing room…" Kermit: "Yeah." Piggy: "Don't smell lilac-y enough." Kermit: "Alright talk to God about lilacs." (Dahne)
5. Kermit: "You know when Piggy and I were a couple, I found her unpredictable and spontaneous and quirky, and that was kind of sexy. But if you take dating out of the equation, she's just a lunatic." (Dahne)



NCIS -
1. Vance: "Apparently your walk included a visit with Matthew Rousseau. Would you mind telling me why?" Gibbs: "Just following up." Vance: "With your pen stuck in his hand?" Gibbs: "Is that where I left it?" (Daniel van der Veer)
2. Taft: "My wife and I lost our son two years ago. Leukemia. If I wasn't back at it, I'd be nowhere. Literally." Gibbs: "Well I'm glad you're back at it." Taft: "Are you?" Gibbs: "What does that mean?" Taft: "Just a feeling I get. You see, I have two kinds of patients. Those who revere me for saving their lives. And those who despise me for the same reason. Which one are you, Gibbs?" Gibbs: "Things are changing. Can't do it alone." Taft: "I've met your team. Who says you're alone?" (Daniel van der Veer)
3. Tony: "You're not a Bond villain, Daniel. You're a fraud. And frauds don't get to speak like Bond villains. They do get to die like them." (Daniel van der Veer)



The Player -
1. Security: "Mr. Raqiv has better protection than the President of the United States." Kane: "Well that would be a comfort except they shot 6 presidents." (Dahne)
2. Cal: "If you had any sense you'd make it work with Ginny." Kane: "If I had any sense I wouldn't be jumping off buildings." (Dahne)
3. Ginny: "We are what we do. Do good; we are good." Kane: "You pulled me out of that life, Ginny. You call me anytime for anything because we're still not even." (Dahne)



Ray Donovan - Paige: "Who do you think is more powerful in this town, you or Andrew Finney?" Ray: "I don't know. Why don't you go up there and find out? But tell the truth and get it all. Who knows, you play your cards right, you might even keep the team." (Darth Locke)



Rosewood -
1. Juju: "You need help from a pro." Villa: "Say amen. Don't disrespect the Lord." Juju: "Amen. Okay, amen." Villa: "Now you're gonna tell me everything you know. Otherwise I'm gonna drag you back to the Jacuzzi and baptize your shifty a** in a very un-Christian sort of way. Now you want to start talking." (Dahne)
2. Rosewood: "Detective Willard, long time no see. How's the wife and kids?" Willard: "They hate me and I hate you." (Dahne)
3. Rosewood: "So yes, I have a unique relationship with death but it has never been my obsession. My obsession is with every breath I take." (Dahne)



Scream Queens -
1. Gigi: "We can make it fun, huh? Like a Friends episode…but someone's…you know, trying to murder all the friends." (Dahne)
2. Wes: "Please don't join a sorority." Grace: "Dad, we've already talked about this." Wes: "The girls are vicious. Okay honey, I know you think sororities are some kind of like magical sisterhoods but it's actually Game of Thrones once you pull back the veneer." (Dahne)
3. Chad: "I'm gonna call you." Munsch: "Because I can't destroy every phone on earth that'll remain a possibility." (Dahne)



Scorpion -
1. Molina: "Respectfully the people in my room are smarter than the people in your room and they say that it should have worked so either a roomful of geniuses are suddenly dumb or a roomful of politicians are lying to protect their own hide. I know which one I would bet on." Toby: "Is she talking to the President like that?" Cabe: "I believe she is." Toby: "I'm getting audited." (Dahne)
2. Molina: "Further you have intimate knowledge of Russian aerospace engineering." Happy: "No, we don't." Molina: "I am looking directly at an illegally obtained Cold War era rocket." Happy: "Oh, that thing." (Dahne)
3. Toby: "You know Adriana, I was wondering if Homeland told you about our Saving the World bonus. It's for when we save the world." Molina: "No but I was made aware of money you owe the IRS in undeclared gambling winnings." Toby: "Maybe we should table the bonus talk right now." (Dahne)

Honesty check - the only reason I was initially interested in Grandfathered was John Stamos (Full House, ER, Necessary Roughness). I wanted to see how the stud of the 80's and 90's had aged and well, he already had a good track record working with kids. That said, I came into the premiere with low expectations because of the premise. Stamos plays Jimmy, a fun-loving 50-something bachelor who owns his own restaurant. His major job is to be charming and schmooze big wigs. Sadly the business is in a bit of a slump because a new restaurant opened up across the street and has been stealing his spotlight and clients. Jimmy wants to land the Deion Sanders' birthday party to pump up their buzz on social media. While in a planning meeting with Annelise, his business manager, a 20-something man named Gerald comes in and claims Jimmy is his father. Apparently Sara, Jimmy's ex and the only woman who ever broke his heart, didn't tell him she was pregnant when they broke up. Yikes! As if this isn't a big enough shock, Gerald then introduces his daughter and Jimmy goes from swinging bachelor to grandfather. Double yikes!


If you're leery about this premise, so was I. I expected to get a complete douche in a midlife crisis or someone so clueless about kids that it would be one endless stream of poop jokes. Refreshingly, this was neither. Yes, Jimmy is self-absorbed and insincere but he has a winning charisma and comes off as more obtuse sometimes than mean or blatantly rude. He also masters the art of diaper changing after watching Gerald do it once. There's no peeing in the face or exaggerated stinky diaper face here and that's a relief. After all, changing a diaper is not exactly rocket science. Mostly he freaks out in the same way any new parent would. Sara is also less stereotypical than I expected. While she does come on strong in the pilot, it is in defense of her child and grandchild instead of a childish spite against an ex. In fact, the relationship between the ex-lovers is far more clichéd than either character alone since they are definitely going to hook up again sooner rather than later.


Overall, Grandfathered exceeded my expectations by not being what I thought it would be. It's charming in parts and funny in others. There's a moment of real heart as well. By the end, the show feels like this unique family dynamic is going to pull together and ride out life's bumps as one. Special kudos go to John Stamos and Paget Brewster. Their characters felt natural and Paget steals every scene she's in. I do wish they would develop Gerald more though because while he comes off as a good-natured doofus, the character isn't very interesting now. Baby Mama Vanessa is equally one-dimensional. Still it's only the pilot. They've got time to grow. So does the show itself. If they continue to walk a more mature line and don't delve into crass humor, it has a shot of becoming weekly viewing to me. Check it out and let me know what you think.




Grade: B
Audience - those who like their comedy family based and full of both heart and laughs

Episode Awards:

Best Reason to Watch - it's funny but it's not stupid funny
Best Character - Sara, although I like Jimmy much better than I ever expected
Best Character Interaction - Sara and Annelise
Best Scene - Jimmy confronts Sara
Best Surprise - Jimmy isn't completely incompetent at being a grandparent until it comes to baby in the restaurant
Biggest Oops - Jimmy changes….
Most Awkward - the father-son hug
Least Surprising - Whenever a parent says the kid will sleep the whole time, it's guaranteed they will not. / Jimmy really loved Sara before.
Worst Plan - ambushing someone at work to tell them they are your father
Worst Prank - the freezer
Most Sympathetic - I have to side with Jimmy here. He can't be expected to just welcome a surprise son and his baby into his arms when it's sprung on him with no warning. Everyone needs time to process huge, life-changing events.
Most Clever - Sara at the hospital
Best Meta / Best Music - Wouldn't It be Nice by The Beach Boys
The "Welcome Back" Award - John Stamos from Full House and ER, Paget Brewster from Criminal Minds and Community, and Christina Milian from Snowglobe.

Great Quotes -

"Everyone, what's the one thing I've always said was missing from my life?""A linen pant that goes from the beach to the bar.""Yes and the search continues."
"Jimmy, I hope this goes well. I do and I hate being the scolding, protective mother stereotype so I hope I only have to say this to you once. If you hurt my son or his daughter, I will choke you to death with your own overly moisturized hands. Okay, gotta run."
"Listen kid, I'm a 50 year old bachelor. We're society's most worthless people."
"Parenthood is pretty much an endless string of moments where you think you've killed your kid."
"You look great by the way. Deal with the devil really paid off.""Yeah, I'm on her side. She's awesome."



Screencaps by Hitfix, Sitcoms Online, Daily Mail, Blackfilm, FOX, and Return Dates.

As fall TV returns, so does Last Week in TV. It's good to be back to discuss TV with you again. If you are new to the column, the gist is that each Monday I publish a short review of the shows I have watched complete with episode awards. I also review one show nominated by the readers. If you have an episode you'd like me to review, please fill out the short 2-question form below. I chose one episode per week via a random number generator. Feel free to nominate as many different shows as you want, but I only review a nominated show once per season unless it becomes part of my weekly schedule. That allows me to cover as many shows as possible.

One big change to the column is that this year, we will also have guest reviewers. (Thanks Sandi for the suggestion.) Last season I tried to review 15-20 shows a week, which became overwhelming so I've decided to cut back. Usually I will review to 10-12 but because this is premiere week and I try to review every pilot, this article is slightly longer. Still I would love to have a wide variety of shows covered so we're introducing Guest Reviewers. This week Blue Star has been generous enough to be our guinea pig and cover Dominion. Thanks so much, Blue Star! If you are interested in being a Guest Reviewer, simply fill out the form below and I will send you some more information. I'd love to include some shows not usually covered.














Blindspot - 1.01 - Pilot

Thus far this is my favorite pilot. Jaimie Alexander sells the story of a woman with drug-induced amnesia who wakes up in Times Square covered in tattoos. Although I am not a fan of amnesia storylines, this one works because no one knows who she is and it becomes the central mystery for the show. It also helps that she is a kickbutt woman as shown when she takes down the abusive landlord and his armed lackey. Mostly though, I like how we got some answers even in the pilot. We know that Jane Doe was special forces, likely a Navy Seal, and that she gave her consent to remove her memories. If the show can continue to give out answers instead of just piling on questions, then I'll keep watching. It does run the risk of dragging the mysteries out too long though so it remains to be seen if this is a watch weekly or marathon type show. As for the pilot, the pacing was just right. There was no exposition overload, largely because no one knows what's going on, and the action was scattered throughout. The biggest kudos remain for the cast though. Jaimie Alexander was stunning especially. She has come a long way from Kyle XY.

Grade: A-

Ranking - 5
Audience - fans of The Blacklist or Memento and shows that have a center conspiracy to unravel

Best Reason to Watch - Jaimie Alexander's acting
Best Character - Jane Doe
Best Character Interaction - Jane Doe and Weller
Best Scene - Jane breaks down
Best Action - Jane takes down the abusive superintendent
Best Use of a Historic Landmark - fight in the Statue of Liberty
Biggest Mystery - Obviously the whole show is one big mystery and who Jane Doe is may be the biggest. Still my biggest question is who is the watcher guy who trained her.
Best Surprise - Jane agreed to having her memory erased
Least Surprising - once Jane asked them to take the suspect alive, it was guaranteed that he'd be dead by the episode's conclusion before he could give any useful intel
Smartest Plan - Jane shoots Chao in the arm instead of killing him
The "Say What?" Award - Why does the investigation into Jane Doe lead directly back to the FBI boss? What is in that redacted file?
The "Maybe There IS a Cone of Silence" Award - The FBI are right upstairs but they don't hear the massive fight Jane Doe is having below them, complete with window breaking. Either the FBI agents are selectively deaf or these tenement slum apartments have some awesome sound proofing.
The "Give It Up Already" Award - Weller keeps trying to get Jane to wait away from the action. It's not going to happen, buddy. Just deal.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Jaimie Alexander of Kyle XY and the Marvel universe, Sullivan Stapleton from Strike Back, Marianne Jean- Baptiste from Without a Trace and Broadchurch, Ukweli Roach from The Royals, and Rob Brown from Finding Forrester and Coach Carter

Best Quotes -
1. Dr. Borden: "You're not helpless. We're defined by our choices. You just don't remember yours. So keep trying new things. See what your body remembers or make new choices. The more you make the less helpless you'll feel. Even if nothing ever comes back, you can still find yourself."
2. Jane: "How did you know that I could make that shot?" Weller: "I didn't know. I took a chance on you."
3. Mayfair: "And she'll never get her memory back?" Doctor: "Honestly we have never had a case like this before and when I say 'we' I mean the entirety of medical science."
4. Weller: "Zapata, can you get us onto that computer?" Zapata: "I'm not gonna lie. I'm a bit hurt you had to ask me that."
5. Chao: "Everything happened the way it was supposed to." Watcher: "No, you were supposed to die. You for your sister, that was the deal."
6. Zapata: "Do you ever get tired of being right?" Weller: "No."





How to Get Away with Murder - 2.01 - It's Time to Move On

Normally I review H2GAwM on a weekly basis but this week I hit a glitch and had to watch it on the very annoying ABC player. Therefore I planned to bypass the review altogether until I saw the last 2 minutes of the episode. I wasn't feeling most of the premiere and for once thought the pacing was too fast, but the ending blew me away. In typical H2G form, they saved the best for last. Watching Wes run away from their clients of the season's house after hearing a gunshot was exciting enough. Then they panned in on Annalise bleeding out and they hooked me again. I want to know who has the cojones to take down someone as powerful and dynamic as Viola Davis…er, Annalise Keating. I don't give a jot about the sex lives of these characters and I was heartbroken when it was revealed that Bonnie, the only decent person on the show, is actually a killer, but you better believe I'm here for Annalise getting taken down because there's going to be hell to pay when she pulls through.

Grade: B

Wish List:
1. Don't bite off more than the writers can chew
2. Keep allowing Viola Davis to work her magic
3. Try to make at least one character sympathetic (mostly for my own peace of mind)
4. Tone down Asher A LOT

Best Quotes -
1. Annalise: "Acting out in class doesn't make him a killer, Frank." Frank: "Where are you going?" Annalise: "To get us a murder case that didn't happen in this house."
2. Michaela: "You do realize I'm not scared to hit a b**." Laurel: "Or just throw me down the stairs. You did a pretty good job with Sam."
3. Michaela: "Where the hell is she taking us?" Laurel: "I think the point is that we don't know." Connor: "Or she's just about to off us." Annalise: "You'd get no warning if I was going to off you, Mr. Walsh. You've all been through hell. So have I. It's a miracle we're still standing. Tonight we're going to forget about all of that."
4. Frank: "It's freaking Lord of the Flies out there."
5. Frank: "Come on. Just go to the motel. Prove to me you're not a psycho killer."





Dominion - 2.12 - Day of Wrath

What a cliffhanger! This episode was very busy, lots going on, and some very interesting reveals. Loved the action in this episode. The darkness’ after effects on everyone was interesting to watch, and I love that Arika has become a better person for it. While not one of my favorite episodes of the season, it was a good set up for the season finale.  (Blue Star)

Grade: B

Best Scene: Michael and Gabriel fight (okay, it’s a series of scenes, sue me)
Best Reason to Watch: Gabriel’s gift from God and Noma’s betrayal are revealed
Most Dramatic: David has to kill William
Most In Need Of Family Therapy: The Archangel Family
Most Whump: Michael keeps getting beat up this season…and here we go again
Most In Need Of A Vacation: Everyone in Vega
Most Frustrating/Awkward: Alex, being in the middle of a love triangle makes you look bad; just choose already
Worst Secret Passage: The 8 balls find the passage to Vega under the bus way too easily
Worst Day On The Job: The bartender overhearing Michael and Gabriel talk is one of the first humans to get possessed
The “You Just Didn’t Have To Start The Apocalypse” Award: Gabriel’s angry at Michael for not sticking by his side during the Extermination War
The “Go Your Own Way” Award: Safe to say, Legion is officially no longer canon in Dominion verse (not sure how I feel about that yet)

Best Quotes -
1. David: "May we be in Heaven a half hour before the Devil knows we're dead."
2. Claire: "Why am I not surprised the cockroach survived in the dark?"
3. Gabriel: "The universe is rather vast. I've searched but never found its end. It's a magnificent thing but daunting in its breadth. And yet, never once have I felt alone...until now."
4. David: "I always loved you." William: "No, you didn't."





Heroes Reborn - 1.01 - Pilot

First things first - I have never seen one episode of the original Heroes series so my point-of-view will likely be different from fans of the original show, especially since my overall reaction was "huh?" This is NOT a show you can just jump into without background knowledge. Basically X-Men mutants called evos have developed throughout the world. Some are good (think Xavier) and some are evil (think first movie Magneto). The humans and the evos try to get along but on the day of unity someone levels a town and some rogue evo gets blamed. All goes poorly for both sides after that and then some chick literally gets pulled into a video game, leaving me hopelessly confused. What?!?! Yeah, this is too bizarre for me. I think Heroes Reborn suffers for newbies in having too much story to tell. While it ups the pace nicely, there are so many pieces on screen at the same time that it's very difficult to care about most of them or even see how they connect. Anti-Chuck flat out kills people with his psycho wife. Peter Pan just wants to be a normal boy. Not-Nice Mia kidnaps someone important…I think. I have no clue what her role actually is or whether she's working for the human or evo side. In the end, I strongly suggest watching the first 4 seasons before tackling this but based on the video game hoodoo plot here, I don't see that happening for me. Sorry Heroes. Hope you save the missing cheerleader….er, the world.

Grade: C+

Ranking - 2
Audience - people who already saw Heroes seasons 1-4 and really wanted a season 5

Best Reason to Watch - the pacing jumps quickly
Best Character - Dead Oscar with Quentin next in line
Worst Character - Joanne, crazy for crazy's sake is interesting for about 5 minutes and then I'm done
Best Action - everything Miko
Best Dilemma - take out Douche Jock's abusive stepdad or risk being ratted out as an evo
Best Twist - the hero's brother is actually the real hero
Best Power - turning metal to gold
Biggest Deal that Completely Went Over My Head - someone killed the Haitian, whomever that is
Resident Nice Girl Next Door - Emily aka sweetest girl on Earth, who of course dates the local jock douche
The "Say What?" Award - Wait a minute. Zachary Levi is a bad guy here? Chuck would be so disappointed.
Most Cliché - the guy with the answers dies before they get any answers
Best Spy Trick - hidden compartment found by pulling out specific books on a shelf
Most Bizarre - some chick pulls out a sword and is suddenly in a video game? Um, huh? I don't get it.
Strangest Collection - the guy with the briefcase full of pennies
Biggest Whoa - opening with the mass terrorist implosion of an entire town is huge
Worst Role Model - motivational speaker getting drunk while telling students that they can be a hero too
The "X-Files" Award - I think "It's Coming" is the new "The Truth is Out There."
The "Welcome Back" Award - Zachary Levi of Chuck, Henry Zebrowski from A to Z, Eve Harlow from The 100

Best Quotes -
1. Luke: "Well that is one superior brand of dry wall." Joanne: "Just our bloody luck. Kid was a teleporter."
2. Noah: "I think it's a scarecrow to keep people out." Quentin: "You think? Shouldn't we be certain where deadly toxins are concerned?"
3. Mystery Woman: "Unless you earn it, money always comes with strings attached."
4. Luke: "Maybe we're in hell." Joanne: "Is that where you think we belong?"
5. Quentin: "Who the hell are you? James Bond?"



Life in Pieces - 1.01 - Pilot

The format of this comedy, where it tells 4 separate stories and then ties them in at the end has its pros and cons. The pros are that nothing is long enough to get old and it will be easy to fast forward through any couple you don't like. The con is that you never get to know anyone. 22 minutes with a comedy A and B story is barely enough so halving that again means it feels more like a webisode. That may be exactly what they are going for but I prefer more connection to my characters. Or at least plotlines that don't all revolve around sex. It's only the first episode so I am going to give this show 2 more to make me care about any of the characters. That's the least I can do for a cast this talented and they are talented. I particularly enjoyed seeing Colin Hanks in a comedic role. You can see traces of his dad in his facial expressions. I also loved having Dianne Wiest on my screen again.

Grade: B-

Ranking - 3+
Audience - anyone who thinks today's comedies are just too long / fans of the cast

Best Reason to Watch - the four segments make none of them long enough to become boring
Best Character - Greg, but that's likely to change if Tyler remains this snarky
Best Scene / Biggest Laugh - rolling the dad casket to the Jiffy Lube
Biggest Overachievers - the Von Trapp family funeral singers
Biggest Facepalm - new dad driving
Most Likely to Die - dearest grandpa for announcing to everyone that his granddaughter just got her period while she was there
Most Embarrassing - police interrupting your sex life because no one has a place of their own / Tyler's mom on his college visit
Worst Plan - throwing your own funeral as your birthday party
Worst Dating Situation Ever / Possible New Hallmark Movie - living with your ex-fiancé when you bring home your date
The "You Tell Him" Award - I am on Team Dianne here. Making your wife throw you a fake funeral is a terrible idea.
The "I Totally Get It" Award - I feel like I've got a decent grasp on technology but multiple TV remotes screw with me too
The "Educational Consultant Available Right Here" Award - that was unlike any college visit I have ever seen
The "Welcome Back" Award - Angelique Cabral from my much missed Enlisted, Colin Hanks aka Alex on Roswell, Betsy Brandt from the Michael J. Fox Show, and James Brolin and Dianne Wiest from everything

Best Quotes -
1. Colleen: "Okay, looks like I've got wine or wine and I also have wine." Matt: "Okay, beer sounds good." Colleen: "Wine it is."
2. Tyler: "Oh, I don't think I want to hear this story."
3. Joan: "Oh honey, no. We still have plenty of time left. 70 is the new 80."
4. Tim: "I don't know if we should be having another kid when we're hiding from the ones we already have."
5. Tyler: "You lost your virginity to a couch?"



Limitless - 1.01 - Pilot

Pilots are tricky. You have to whet the audience's taste for your show and set up the basics. Sometimes though shows go overboard on one side as is the case here. Limitless may be the most exposition-heavy pilot I have seen in years. Every time something starts to happen there's either a voiceover or a character explaining something to someone else. In the end, the pilot left me with great knowledge of what I missed by not seeing the movie but it was so exposition dense that I didn't care anymore. I liked the actors and the characters will likely grow on me but the pacing needs to improve rapidly. I do see potential so Limitless has 2 more episodes to show me what it can do before it gets dropped into my TV Wasteland, likely never to be heard from again.

Grade: C

Ranking - 3
Audience - anyone who liked the movie or who is into sci-fi and can suspend disbelief

Best Reason to Watch - the premise is interesting and the characters have potential
Best Character - Brian's dad and dead Eli
Best Character Interaction - Brian and Harris
Best Scene - Brian visits his dad in the hospital before his transplant
Best Feature - the action
Worst Feature - a whole lot of exposition / voiceovers
Best Guest/Recurring Character - Senator Morra
Dumbest Question - Boyle asks why Harris didn't shoot an unarmed man on a subway platform while a train was coming. I can think of several answers already, even without NZT 48.
Best Plan - Harris realizes that Brian is a resource to use, not a lab rat to study
Best/Worst Friend - depending on whether you would take the red pill or the blue pill, Eli's offer is awesome or the worst thing that could have happened
Best Use of YouTube - learning how to pick a lock
Biggest Stretch - increasing your intelligence makes you good at everything instantly or makes you capable of doing physical things even faster (Ex. becoming smarter still shouldn't allow you to file papers in over 22,000 files in two hours, especially if you stop to read each file)
Biggest Trend - starting the episode in the middle and then flashing back to how they got there
Least Surprising - Harris has a family tie to the whole NZT thing
Least Likely to Hold Up in Court - everything from Brian's bank robbery info
Most Psychic - Harris, who knows that Brian is shot in the leg even though he never tells her that
The "Welcome Back" Award - Blair Brown who was the fabulous Nina Sharp on Fringe, Jake McDorman of Greek and Manhattan Love Story, Jennifer Carpenter from Dexter, Hill Harper from Covert Affairs, and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, most recently as Mama Grimm (miss you already)

Best Quotes -
1. Harris: "You think I'm impressed that you can stomp around in my life? You're not smart. You're high."
2. Eli: "Yeah I know. Twenty year old me would punch 28 year old me in the face."
3. Harris: "If you hand me my gun right now I probably won't shoot you."
4. Boyle: "Is it me or did the whole world just change?"
5. Brian: "Why? I'm nobody. Everybody says you're gonna be president soon." Morra: "I haven't officially announced that yet but between me and you, I don't even know if I'm gonna run. Do you know how much time we get off in the Senate? It's shocking really. I don't know if I can give it up."
6. Brian: "They…they train you guys, right, to…to patch up bullet wounds like in case of emergencies or something." Harris: "They tell us to get to a hospital."
7. Brian: "Sorry for stealing your coat, Tanner Evans, but to be honest you seem like a little bit of a douche."
8. Brian: "Hi. My name is Brian Finch and the first thing you should know about me is I didn't do anything wrong. Well not the kind of wrong that leads to having a gun in your face anyway."



Minority Report - 1.01 - Pilot

Much like Rosewood, which also debuted last week, Minority Report is a typical crime procedural. Partners of opposite gender, check. One partner has a specialty and isn't a police detective, check. This partner also has trouble with basic human interaction, check. The other partner is a kick butt police officer who doesn't always follow rules - check, check, and triple check. One of the cop's family members was murdered, big old check. The only thing that distinguishes Minority Report is its technology and its overarching storyline is likely to be bigger than the others. After all, we've got a precognitive mystery hanging overhead. The question then becomes whether the tech is enough. For me it isn't. All it does is remind me that the superior Almost Human was cancelled. Almost Human had better chemistry between the leads and the case, while technologically interesting, did not make me excited for the next episode. I think this one is stuck in the marathon later pile for me…if it lasts that long.

Grade: C

Ranking - 2
Audience - those who thought Almost Human was not enough of a typical police procedural but who still like the future elements

Best Reason to Watch - the futuristic setting
Best Character - Vega, although Akeela will probably be later
Best Scene - Vega and team find the first murderer and he kills himself via a plank
Best Perk - all that technology
Best Meta - Simpsons season 75
Biggest Douche - Blake
Biggest Mystery - Agatha's vision and Dash's role in it
Most Likely to Misconstrue Simple Human Interaction - Dash
Worst Plan - leaning out the open window where the victim fell to her death
Most Scary - the future use of all that technology to keep tabs on people
Most Sucky Power - to see people die and not be able to stop it
The "Welcome Back" Award - Meagan Good from Deception, Wilmer Valderrama from That 70's Show

Best Quotes -
1. Blake: "I would have closed him differently but okay."
2. Vega: "Are you familiar with the concept of a whisper?"
3. Arthur: "You brought a friend. Maybe I underestimated my little brother." Vega: "Little? I thought you were twins." Dash: "Older by 7 minutes." Arthur: "Dash was afraid to come out." Dash: "I finally had some peace and quiet."
4. Vega: "I'm a homicide cop using an illegal psychic to stop a murder. I'd say we're all off-road already."
5. Akeela: "Okay, next karaoke night you're gonna have to tell me what happened between you two."



The Muppets - 1.01 - Pilot

From the get-go this was not going to be a show for me. Even as a kid, I wasn't into The Muppet Show. Plus I hate mockumentaries. I have zero interest watching real people or comedians talk about their co-workers in fake interviews so watching puppet interviews was not going to cut it. Still I try to watch the pilot of every new show in the season. It was worse than I expected. The Rainbow Connection Kermit is gone. In his place is yet another world-weary office drudge trying to please a megalomaniac boss. In this case, she happens to be his ex too. It is exactly as much fun as spending your lunch hour with those annoying co-workers who complain about everything non-stop. 10 minutes in and I was checking to see how much time I had left. Worst yet, I didn't laugh at all. Thus far, this is the worst pilot of the bunch for me.

Grade: D
Ranking - 1
Audience - people who like The Office but felt it wasn't world-weary enough / people without fond memories of The Muppets that still like puppets

Best Reason to Watch - Chances are you probably liked one of the Muppets as a kid. This is also the #1 reason why NOT to watch if you want your childhood memories to stay intact.
Best Character - Sam the Eagle
Best Character Interaction -
Best Guests - Imagine Dragons
Best Scene - Imagine Dragons snippet at the end
Best Product Placement - Costco
Biggest Shock - I'm on Miss Piggy's side about the breakup. Kermit knew what he was signing up for when he started dating a star.
Least Funny - Fozzie
Most Annoying Character (Possibly on TV) - Miss Piggy
Most Likely to Have Brain Damage From Excessive Drug Use - Zoot
Most Likely to Pass the SAT by Sheer Guessing - Dr. Teeth
The "I'm with You" Award - interview Gonzo talks about hating the now overused faux documentary style
The "Pass the Brain Bleach Please" Award - I never, ever needed to hear reference to a puppet's sex life. Even in innuendo. Nope. Just no.

Best Quotes -
1. Kermit: "My life is a bacon-wrapped hell on earth." Sam: "Can't say hell."
2. Piggy: "And the lilacs in my dressing room…" Kermit: "Yeah." Piggy: "Don't smell lilac-y enough." Kermit: "Alright talk to God about lilacs."
3. Kermit: "You know when Piggy and I were a couple, I found her unpredictable and spontaneous and quirky, and that was kind of sexy. But if you take dating out of the equation, she's just a lunatic."
4. Piggy: "I have an excellent reason. I hate her stupid face." Kermit: "That is not an excellent reason. That's a preschool reason."
5. Banks: "Did you even read the script?" Piggy: "What's to read? Hunger Games. It's all in the title." Banks: "Okay, I'm already in the movie right? I can…I can go."



The Player - 1.01 - Pilot

The Player revolves around a group of people so rich that they are bored with life. They've hacked into every technology imaginableto steal data about everyone but instead of helping the world through this violation of privacy, they use it to bet on crime. Yep instead of helping to stop crime before it happens, they gamble on whether the criminal will be successful or not. Basically the whole premise is morally repugnant. Enter an ex-FBI assassin turned security consultant. They want him to be the Player of the organization, taking on the world's most ruthless criminals. For some reason they feel that by having another assassin kills his wife (maybe), he will get sucked up into the shady world of high stakes crime betting. Implausibly it works. He becomes a one-man crime fighting machine, no super powers included but he does have access to that nifty tech. As the evil rich overlords take bets on how long he will last, I'm putting my money on Nielsen to take him out and rather quickly I suspect. As for me, if I stay it will only be for the action, which is indeed a high point. Story wise, this appears to be another crime of the week where the bad guys always win because the real bad guys are the people placing the bets.

Grade: C

Ranking - 2
Audience - people who like action and moral ambiguity

Best Reason to Watch - pretty much guaranteed action every week
Best Character - Kane
Best Scene - Kane realizes that it is not Ginny's body
Best Action - Kane vs. kidnappers
Best Death - impaled by roulette wheel
Biggest Mysteries - Who is dead if that wasn't Ginny and where then is Ginnny?
Biggest Bull - trying to spin this gambling as an altruistic thing is nuts
Biggest Kick-Butt Character - Medina Raqib. You don't mess with a mama or her young. Not if you want to live.
Best Music - Tick Tick Boom by The Hives
The "When in Doubt…" Award - go low-tech
The "Say What?" Award - People are betting on murder? That's sick.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Wesley Snipes from the 90's

Best Quotes -

1. Security: "Mr. Raqiv has better protection than the President of the United States." Kane: "Well that would be a comfort except they shot 6 presidents."
2. Cal: "If you had any sense you'd make it work with Ginny." Kane: "If I had any sense I wouldn't be jumping off buildings."
3. Ginny: "We are what we do. Do good; we are good." Kane: "You pulled me out of that life, Ginny. You call me anytime for anything because we're still not even."
4. Kane: "Yeah, I'm officially terrified of what you can do."
5. Kane: "I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for Shada and Ginny. When I'm done, I'm gonna come back here and throw you through that window."



Rosewood - 1.01 - Pilot

You've probably seen this one before. A non-cop with specialized skills teams up with a police detective to solve crimes and eventually hook up. You know, it's that show - the one you already love/hate/dropped a few seasons ago/can't get enough of. Focusing on a brilliant pathologist, Rosewood uses Morris Chestnut's charm and good looks to sell a story we've already heard and to an extent it succeeds. Rosewood comes off more impressive than arrogant, more personable than obnoxious. Still it toes the line pretty closely and if the character ever crosses to the douche side, the series will collapse under the weight of all the other shows that came before it. There's really nothing to distinguish Rosewood from a thousand others and in a fall season packed with new material, viewers might pass on it altogether. Coming after Empire, it opened to big numbers but I'm not sure Chestnut's abs and smile will be enough to keep them paired together. Rosewood needs to find something to separate it from the pack to survive.

Grade: C+

Ranking - 3
Audience - shippers who don't mind procedurals and a decent dose of eye candy
TV Formula - Castle's setup + Bones' science/tech + House's genius + actual people skills = Rosewood

Best Reason to Watch - Chestnut oozes charm and there are some humorous parts
Best Character - Villa
Best Character Interaction - Rosewood and his mentor
Best Scene - Villa interrogates Juju
Least Surprising - Villa's husband is dead
Least Likely to Hold Up in Court - everything on the boat since there's nothing legal about what she was doing
MVP - the music is awesome
Best Eye Candy - Morris Chestnut running shirtless, scar or not
Biggest Cliché - yet another non-cop solving crimes with a police detective, most likely to hook up by season one's finale because there's no way they let a male and female partnership remain platonic
Most Original - cocaine vinyl records
The "It's a Fine Line" Award - between charming and smugly overbearing. Rosewood walks that line pretty tightly in the pilot but he's one toe away from becoming the arrogant, obnoxious genius that I hate in similar shows.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Clancy Brown (the beloved Corbin on Sleepy Hollow), Morris Chestnut (originally from Boyz in the Hood and recently from Legends, Nurse Jackie, American Horror Story, and V)

Best Quotes -
1. Juju: "You need help from a pro." Villa: "Say amen. Don't disrespect the Lord." Juju: "Amen. Okay, amen." Villa: "Now you're gonna tell me everything you know. Otherwise I'm gonna drag you back to the Jacuzzi and baptize your shifty a** in a very un-Christian sort of way. Now you want to start talking."
2. Rosewood: "Detective Willard, long time no see. How's the wife and kids?" Willard: "They hate me and I hate you."
3. Rosewood: "So yes, I have a unique relationship with death but it has never been my obsession. My obsession is with every breath I take."
4. Pippy: "How do we feel about a 9 year old working the grill?" Rosewood: "I feel great. Better her than me."
5. Rosewood: "Be honest. Did you kill Juju?" Villa: "No but we bonded in a meaningful way." Rosewood: "I don't want to know what that means…"
6. TMI: "Hair and nail growth after death is normal. Color change after death is super weird."



Scream Queens - 1.01/1.02 - Pilot/Hell Week

There's nothing quite like Scream Queens on TV. I'm just not sure yet whether that is a good thing or bad. Scream Queens plays itself off as a farce but there's only so many stupid people I can take in one episode, especially when they really are not funny. On the other hand, the second episode was far better than the pilot, mostly because of the introduction of Denise. She's as dumb as the rest of them but she had me chortling. I loved when she freaked out and pushed her friend's dead body out of the car and raced away. Yep, that was the funniest part of the whole 2 hours. The mystery itself is pretty good too. There's no shortage of suspects and since this is going to be a tag team killer at the least, no one can be ruled out as a suspect. Not even the dead. I love how the murders are tied to a death from 1995 as well. It not only heightens the suspense but it lends Scream Queens a sweet sound track from the 80's and 90's. I mean if you are going to let your "sister" die in a bathtub from neglect, it might as well be to TLC's Waterfalls. The biggest mystery of course is whether FOX can hold together the plot for another 13 episodes.

Grade: C+ / B

Ranking - 4- (for now)
Audience - people who laugh during horror movies and snark through the worst of them

Best Reason to Watch - it's unique in the TV landscape
Best Character - Hester, who puts her creepy out in the open instead of hiding it
Best Character Interaction - Grace and her dad
Best Scene - the ending
Best Twist - Munsch knew about the dead baby mamma from 20 years ago / Boone surprise
Best Advice - don't get attached to anyone because they're going to die or be in league with Satan
Biggest Laugh / Best Moment - Twitter before death. You can't expire until you hit the Tweet button.
Biggest Awww Moment - 3 second silent hug with no eye contact
Biggest Douche - technically everyone in this show counts but Chad and Chanel tie by a conceited hair
Biggest Huh - texting someone to say you're going to kill them
Biggest Red Herring - the freaky psycho music playing when Grace leaves Pete
The "Say What?" Award - Your friend comes downstairs with blood all over her hands and the first thing you think is her period? Are you kidding? (Hermoine voice) What. An. Idiot.
Most Brutal - death by lawnmower
Most Terrifying - surprisingly it's not the Red Devil killing everyone but Hester, who could kill you and destroy all the evidence
Most Literal - dancing with the devil means something totally different here
Best Throwback - Waterfalls by TLC
Worst Throwback - Twilight and Team Edward
Worst Mascot Ever - if your school chooses Satan as their mascot, you can't be surprised when a serial killer moves in too
Worst Timing - Munsch hits on Grace's dad while talking about serial killing cannibals
Worst in a Crisis - Denise, who pushes her dead friend out of the car and drives away
The "Brave Little Toaster / Total Idiot" Award - Grace goes into the creepy basement for suds when the lights don't work
The "Welcome Back" Award - Emma Roberts who will always be Nancy Drew to me and Jamie Lee Curtis, Queen of the Scream and current yogurt peddler
Best Music - If You Were Here by The Thompson Twins aka theme from the ending of 16 Candles

1. Gigi: "We can make it fun, huh? Like a Friends episode…but someone's…you know, trying to murder all the friends."
2. Wes: "Please don't join a sorority." Grace: "Dad, we've already talked about this." Wes: "The girls are vicious. Okay honey, I know you think sororities are some kind of like magical sisterhoods but it's actually Game of Thrones once you pull back the veneer."
3. Chad: "I'm gonna call you." Munsch: "Because I can't destroy every phone on earth that'll remain a possibility."
4. Chanel: "Sisters and pledges of Kappa Kappa Tau, you now all share something so very precious to me." Grace: "A felony." Chanel: "A secret and secrets are the glue that bind sorority sisters together."
5. Munsch: "After Dean Reynolds' unfortunate passing over the summer, I was promoted to her position." Chanel: "Well that sure sounds suspicious." Munsch: "Yes, I snuck into the home of my 80 year old colleague of 20 years and dropped a transistor radio in her bathtub so I could get a 5% raise."
6. Chanel #2: "I love a creepy collage."
7. Munsch: "You see out in the real world people just don't talk that way to other people. It's not normal."
8. Chanel: "I would not get personal with me, sweetheart. I don't fight fair."
9. Chanel: "Okay, so you all want to be Kappa's, is that right? Well you're about to learn what being a Kappa is all about. It's about kicking the living cr** out of someone when they disrespect you."
10. Chanel: "No one forced that goat to get as drunk as he got. That's on him."





TBBT - 9.01 - The Matrimonial Momentum

Last year, The Big Bang Theory made significant strides in character development especially with Sheldon. It felt like the show had renewed itself. That's why I am leery about them breaking up Sheldon and Amy. I do think Amy needs her own storyline and I am 100% NOT a shipper, but I also don't want Sheldon to devolve back into the first 7 seasons of very little growth. For me, this plot twist will be judged on whether I can stand Sheldon in it or not. I was also surprised that Penny and Leonard went through with the marriage, given how negative they were leading up to it. That's not the way to start a new life together so I wish they had waited on this too. Married but separated isn't very interesting. In the end, it is Mary Cooper's appearance that raises the grade from a C for me. She is probably my favorite character on the show and she's the only time I laughed in the premiere, even though the dialogue was snappier than usual. Every year, TBBT goes in my wait and see pile. Every year, I do end up watching weekly instead of in marathon. Sheldon will be the determining factor to see if the tradition continues in season 9.

Grade: B-

Wish List:
1. Allow Sheldon to grow as a character
2. Give the women more to do and better plotlines
3. More of their parents
4. Energize the tired jokes
5. Mix up the screen time and who's interacting with whom

Best Reason to Watch - Mary Cooper
Best Character - Bernadette
Best Guest - Mary Cooper, who steals every scene she's in like always
Best Way to Deal with Sheldon - close the curtains on him
Best Gesture - Sheldon brings Penny tea so they can commiserate together
Most Bizarre - Toy Story lyrics as vows
Most Beautiful - Leonard's vows
Most Annoying - Sheldon by a landslide…and he was getting so much better last season
Most Surprising - Leonard and Penny actually DID get married
Worst Plan - if you are not happy with eloping, don't
Best Plan - Howard says to just write that it was a beautiful wedding when everyone else misses it
Worst Comment to a Recent Ex - talking about their biological clock won't help you win Amy back, Sheldon
The "Sign of the Ages" Award - watching a wedding via the internet
The "Well That got Creepy Fast" Award - Stuart goes from conciliatory to stalker in 3 seconds flat
The "It's About Time" Award - Amy tells Sheldon off and then breaks up with him
The "Way to Know Your Partner" Award - Penny says the exact right thing to make Leonard happy cry
The "Just Chill" Award - Stuart who is inappropriate with Amy and then gets too excited that a married Penny is in a fight with Leonard

Best Quotes -
1. Sheldon: "When last we spoke, you said you needed time." Amy: "It's only been 11 hours." Sheldon: "The Lord of the Rings trilogy was nearly 11 hours. I made you watch that. You said it was an eternity."
2. Howard: "I'm not saying anything bad. Just that she was in love with her captor and somehow managed to escape from his dark and crazy dungeon."
3. Sheldon: "It's over for me. I'm done with women. Like when I swore off Pop Rocks. They both hurt you on purpose."
4. Sheldon: "She plays the harp and her car is paid for. How much happier can she be?"
5. Mary: "When your idiot brother redeems mankind, he can date whomever he wants."
6. Sheldon: "Some important new information has come to light. Women are the worst. I thought it was paper cuts but I was wrong. No piece of paper ever cut me this deep."
7. Sheldon: "That last one was Madam Curie." Leonard: "I figured that out." Sheldon: "You know what? She was kind of an honorary man. She had a penis made of science."
8. Sheldon: "Raj, you're probably wondering why Amy and I aren't showing any affection to one another." Raj: "Didn't even crack the top 10."



Fresh Off the Boat - 2.01 - Family Business Trip

Fresh Off the Boat was the surprise comedy of the year for me last year. It had that great Goldbergs' mixture of heart and laughs that I love so well. In a season of disappointing new comedies, it is the only one I stuck with that didn't get cancelled (miss you Benched). That's why I am glad that they are not messing with the formula in this premiere. I loved how Louis teaches Jessica to relax but at the same time he confirms that Jessica's role in keeping the family in order is important. Here is a couple that can fight and yet very plainly show that they love and respect each other. It's a refreshing change. There's still too much focus on Eddie but I was glad to see that Emery and Evan are starting to get distinct personalities since last season I pretty much called them Kid 1 and Kid 2. All in all, this was a superb return to form and I look forward to seeing what Jessica is up to next…and the rest of the Huang family.

Grade: B+

Wish List:
1. Less Eddie
2. More Jessica
3. Make the 2 youngest distinguishable from each other instead of background kid wallpaper (CHECK)
4. Keep up with the heart mixed in with the laughs (CHECK)

Best Reason to Watch - laughs + heart
Best Character - Jessica as always
Best Character Interaction - Jessica and Louis
Best Scene - Louis shows Jessica how to relax
Best Marketing - the rollercoaster
Biggest Awww Moment - Louis tells Jessica that she allows him to him
Most In Charge - Jessica when taking down Gator Carol
Most Likely to Incur Vandalism Charges - Jessica in her hunt to not have to pay for a single item more
Most Popular - Emery, who has a rock star lineup of girls wanting him to sign his yearbook
Most Busted - Louis, whose business trip includes a lot of play time
Most Anachronistic - Who was talking about identity theft in the 90's?
Worst Trend - being a couch potato is admirable
Worst Tooth Fairy Ever - instead of leaving money, she leaves chores
Worst to Vacation With - Jessica who puts the pinch in money pincher
Least Likely to be Asked to Sign Yearbooks - Evan, who takes up all the pages to write his memoirs in some poor kid's book
The "Say What?" Award - Bring a cat to feed to the gators and get a discount? PETA must be picketing.
The "Duck and Cover" Move - all the men at the convention center hide when they think their wife is the one calling them out for goofing off

Best Quotes -
1. Eddie: "These guys aren't rappers." Jessica: "They were the gangsters of the sales bin."
2. Louis: "Your job is a vacation…from poverty."
3. Louis: "You're watching out for us so I don't have to. I can be me 'cause I have you."
4. Arielle: "What do you do for joy, Jessica?" Jessica: "I micromanage my family."
5. Louis: "All the franchise power players are going to be there. I need to make a good impression. Which one's Louis Huang? Oh he's the steakhouse owner in the sharkskin suit." Jessica: "Or he's the Chinese guy."
6. Jessica: "We will be using God's towel, the sun."



The Goldbergs - 3.01 - A Kick-A** Risky Business Party

I didn't realize how much I missed The Goldbergs until tonight. No one does heart and laughs better than this show. No one. This episode had me laughing so hard during Beverly's Tom Cruise impersonation that I literally had to pause the episode to catch my breath. Sometimes having the most embarrassing mom on the planet comes in handy. I also loved the moment between Erica and Beverly when Erica realizes that she does appreciate her mother and even though they aren't going to be buddies right now, they may in the future. It was wiser than her years and completely on point. Normally Beverly going this over-the-top bugs me but it was played well for laughs in this case, partly mitigated by Lainey's absolute appreciation for having a mom in her life. I liked that combo and hope we see more of it. It gives Lainey some needed depth if she's going to be staying around and it allows Beverly to seem more sympathetic even at her worst. As always Murray was a high point too, but I wish they would stop having him capitulate to his kids all the time. It would be a great change to see them finally appreciate him and understand why they have the rules they do. Even at 10 minutes, a long-distance call to Seattle every night in the 80's would break the bank. At least make it a once a week thing. Really the only person who comes off poorly in this premiere is Barry. I refuse to think that Beverly would have a stupid child with all the emphasis she put on Lainey's education here, so perhaps letting him be smart sometimes would be a good thing.

Grade: A-

Wish List:
1. Tone Beverly down
2. More Murray with his kids
3. More Pops
4. Let Barry be smart in his own way
5. Keep the heart and laugh mixture coming (Check)

Best Reason to Watch / Best Scene - Beverly doing her Tom Cruise impersonation
Best Character - Beverly
Best Return - Mirsky
Biggest Awww Moment - Erica and Beverly while they are cleaning up after the party
Biggest Rookie Mistake - Erica goes in with a lie about a boyfriend without having any details ready
Most Obnoxious - Beverly tapping on the window
Most Manipulative - Lainey
Most in Need of a Hug - Mr. Glascott
Worst Teen tradition - the "you hang up" game
The "I'm With You" Award - long-distance calling was insanely expensive in the 80's, even to call a few towns away
The "If At First You Don't Succeed…" Award - Stop. Just stop. Barry's attempt to be Tom Cruise is painful to watch.


Best Quotes -
1. Erica: "Thank you for staying. It was pretty cool of you." Beverly: "Look, I know I got carried away with Lainey. It's just I loved having someone who was willing to listen. Someone who's not always pushing me away." Erica: "And I know you love us more than anything and we appreciate it. We really do." Beverly: "So maybe you won't push me away as much." Erica: "It depends on if you won't get carried away so much." Beverly: "Yeah, both aren't gonna happen." Erica: "For now."
2. Murray: "I'm sorry, Adam. I can't afford your love. It's too pricey."
3. Beverly: "What did I tell you about Tom Cruise-ing the floor? It's incredibly risky."
4. Beverly: "The good news is, Lainey, your dad agreed to let you stay with us until he gets back. That means I have 6 days to fix your entire life." Erica: "No way, you have already ruined our lives with your insane love. You are not ruining Lainey's too." Beverly: "Please. She's hot rodding, failing her classes, spending time with shady friends…" Erica: "Hey." Beverly: "Showing questionable taste in boys." Barry: "That's fair."
5. Erica: "No, our mom is just poisoning your mind with her endless well of love and support." Lainey: "Yeah, I'm not seeing how that's a bad thing."
6. Barry: "Sweet Rebecca De Mornay, it's happening. We're gonna throw a real life kick a** Risky Business party."



Scorpion - 2.01 - Satellite of Love

This episode is a win for shippers. It's a distraction in many places for everyone else. Without the constant breaks for shipping, this episode would be an A for me and the best episode of the week. It had tons of snarky fun and great action. Sure it was implausible but not near as much as the pilot so that was a bonus as well. Not to mention Walter got a sense of humor in rehab, making him far less of a douche and a whole lot more fun too. Talk about a positive change! The new Director of Homeland Security is a big plus as well. Where Merrick was cranky and irritating, Molina is frank and applause-worthy. She's also a pure politician who hogs all the credit and can't be trusted so it should be fun watching the crew work with her. The problem then (and why the grade fell) was the pacing. This episode would just hit its stride when the momentum came to a huge, screeching halt for one of the two star-crossed sets of lovers to declare their feelings, or not declare their feelings, or somewhat declare their feelings, or refuse to declare their feelings, or…..you get the picture. Ugh! That's way too much action-crushing emoangsting for one show, especially one that's thrives on pure adrenaline and humor. Whoever is messing with this show, please stop now.

Grade: B

Wish List:
1. Kill the Walter and Paige romance
2. More time for other main characters and less of a laser focus on Walter
3. Ralph does NOT save anyone and is shuffled off to the back corner only to be referenced occasionally
4. Fix Walter and Cabe's relationship (CHECK)
5. Keep the fun (CHECK)

Best Reason to Watch - all the humor
Best Character - Molina, who is a sensational addition to the show
Best Scene - Molina tells off the President
Best Cameo - Gene Simmons from KISS
Best Reaction - Cabe, Toby, and Happy to Walter's parachute falling down beside them
Best Change - Merrick is out and Molina is in
Best Asset - Happy speaks Japanese
Best Taking Charge - tie - Molina gives the President what for / Happy pulls out all the telephone wires
Biggest Oops - definitely turn off the intercom before having a private tête-a-tête
Biggest Eye Roll - A computer virus gotten to please shippers stops the plan to save the world? Shipping kills the world.
Least Surprising - Walter's vertigo comes back at the wrong time
Most Awkward - Paige and Walter
Most Adorable - Sylvester hugs Walter (a little too tight)
Most Bizarre - Cabe working for Hollywood
Most Worthless Cliffhanger - Paige can't remember the command left to right because of altitude sickness
The "It Does Exist" Award - Walter has a sense of humor and uses it to save everyone from Chopsticks
The "Oh Why Not?" Award - Paige grabs the rabbit's foot for extra luck
The "We Interrupt This World Saving Crisis To…" Award - …talk about our feelings. Again. Shoot me now.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Alana De La Garza from my dearly departed Forever. I miss that show so much.

Best Quotes -
1. Molina: "Respectfully the people in my room are smarter than the people in your room and they say that it should have worked so either a roomful of geniuses are suddenly dumb or a roomful of politicians are lying to protect their own hide. I know which one I would bet on." Toby: "Is she talking to the President like that?" Cabe: "I believe she is." Toby: "I'm getting audited."
2. Molina: "Further you have intimate knowledge of Russian aerospace engineering." Happy: "No, we don't." Molina: "I am looking directly at an illegally obtained Cold War era rocket." Happy: "Oh, that thing."
3. Toby: "You know Adriana, I was wondering if Homeland told you about our Saving the World bonus. It's for when we save the world." Molina: "No but I was made aware of money you owe the IRS in undeclared gambling winnings." Toby: "Maybe we should table the bonus talk right now."
4. Walter: "Oh no, no, no. I'm resting." Cabe: "That's wise and the next time you hold out on me in regards to your health, we're gonna have an issue." Walter: "Paige told you?" Cabe: "No, I just know you kid."
5. Happy: "It was a toy. Now it's a weapon." Toby: "Very mature. Warfare sprinkled with arts and crafts."
6. PT: "Alright, well you need to avoid stress at all costs. This isn't a joke, Mr. O'Brien." Walter: "I'm a tech geek. How stressful can it be?"

Welcome back to Last Week in Review. With the onslaught of Fall TV, I am officially behind already. Thankfully I had a great group of people volunteer to write guest reviews for me. Thanks so much to Blue Star, Emma, Laura Markus, Missions, Swanpride, and Toni for being our next batch of guinea pigs. I very much appreciate it. Since we are still in the middle of pilot season, I decided to postpone the nominated episode until next week but I am very excited that it is Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, which is tied with Buffy as the greatest Joss Whedon creation for me. I love this show! If you have a show you would like me to review, simply fill out the form below. If you have any questions about the nominating process or how shows are randomly picked each week, please sound off in the comments below. Don't forget to leave your episode awards for the week there too. Thanks to everyone who kept the discussion going last week. It was fun chatting with you about TV again. Until next time, happy viewing.









The Blacklist - 3.01 - The Troll Farmer

The Blacklist is a show I generally marathon because of its slow overarching mytharc and general lack of answers. It's in marathon that this show sizzles. That being said, I couldn't wait to see Liz on the run and it really paid off. Many times I have a problem with how hypocritical Keene can be but now that she's on the run that is all taken away. It puts Reddington and her on a more equal footing and that's great for their interaction. I also like how Ressler is getting a bump up in leadership as well. While I'm not a fan of him believing the worst in her, it makes the interplay between them more intricate and fascinating. Real kudos though goes to Aram, who never gives up faith that Liz is innocent. Here's hoping that he gets more screen time this season because he and Navabi are often shafted. Another plus to this episode was the blacklister himself. I find information warfare through social media fascinating. It really brings home that nothing on the internet can really be trusted. Mostly though, this is my Show of the Week because of the fantastic pacing.

Grade: B+

Wish List:
1. Answers to the big questions come faster and throughout the season, not just at the end
2. More Aram and Navabi, preferably out in the field
3. Liz and Ressler need to be less of hypocritical douches (more sympathetic)
4. Don't clear Liz's name right away but let it stir character development
5. Keep the interesting criminals (Check)

Best Reason to Watch - Liz on the run keeps her from being hypocritical
Best Scene / Best Action - Dembe takes down everyone
Best Change - Liz as a blonde works, although I do prefer the brunette look on her
Best Plan - Lizzie goes to the Russian consulate
Worst Plan - Lizzie admits to being a Russian spy in front of Ressler and Navabi
Best Update to a Classic Speech - instead of searching every farm house and hen house, Ressler wants to search every Twitter, Instagram, and Reddit thread
Biggest Backstabber - Reddington gives up the Troll Farmer to Ressler
Worst Move - threatening Dembe's family
Most Charming - only Red can make a woman feel special while locking her in a bathroom
Most Ingenious Crime - information warfare through social media
Most Competent - Liz for finding a perfect new place to hide / Navabi for outing Ressler on helping Liz escape
Most Interesting Storyline - What do they want from Dembe?
The "Say What?" Award - I thought Dembe's daughter was blind. How could she describe him like that?
The "What the Heck" Award - Ressler just pops the gangbanger who is holding Navabi hostage. Frankly, I expected Navabi to save herself but Ressler didn't give her any time.
The "Come On Guys" Award - You didn't immediately suspect something when a car trailer was in front of them? That's the first place I would have looked. No more watching The Following for you.
The "You Must Die NOW" Award - anyone who threatens an infant must die
The "Be Careful What You Wish For" Award - that body double is way too big of a Reddington fan

Best Quotes -
1. Reddington: "Chin up, Chang. Believe in yourself and others will too." Chang: "What is that? Another one of your dumba** literary quotes." Reddington: "Fortune cookie."
2. Navabi: "They can't just disappear." Aram: "It is Mr. Reddington."
3. Ressler: "So that's what this is about. You knowing that I'll find her and giving me a blacklister in exchange for when I do." Reddington: "No, it's not a trade or a bribe or an offer of payment in kind to entice you to look away. I admire your probity too much for that." Ressler: "So what do you want cause you only give to get?" Reddington: "All I want is your word as a man of honor."
4. Ressler: "If they get out of this city, we're going to be hunting ghosts."
5. Reddington: "You have every right to be afraid. Just don't let it control you."






Criminal Minds – 11.01 – The Job

By Emma

I loved the S10 finale but I was a little concerned that the season 11 premiere would be a bit underwhelming in comparison since everything was wrapped up when we went on hiatus. I needn’t have been worried though as the writers used the opportunity to take a different approach to introduce us to the newest member of the BAU. Having Dr Lewis’ traditional interview interrupted limited the exposition on how great Dr. Lewis is and instead used the COTW as a working interview to show us her talents and how seamlessly she fits in with the team. Kudos to the writers for mixing it up and taking a different approach to a new character’s introduction. This episode also had great little moments: sassy Rossi, Garcia/Morgan love, and a glimpse of JJ and her new baby (played by AJ Cooks’ real life newborn). The COTW was pretty standard fare for Criminal Minds but it also seems to be setting up a season long arc with the serial killer network. My only concern with this arc is that Morgan seems to be particularly bent on bringing them down which could be setting the stage for Shemar Moore to leave the show. All in all, a very solid premiere for a show starting its 11th season!

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch – Dr. Lewis’ (Aisha Tyler) character introduction
Best Scene – Dr. Lewis pretends to be the Captain’s wife to relay to him the BAU plan without tipping off the Unsub
Best Character Interaction – Garcia and Morgan
Best Example of Art Imitating Life – JJ talks on the phone with Hotch about the difficulties adjusting to life with two kids (AJ just had her second child in July, who is shown onscreen as JJ’s new son)
Best Improvisation – When the police interrupt your original plan to murder someone, glue a grenade to their hands instead.
Best Reason Not To Hire a Hit Man – Assuming one actually needs a reason, how about they will kill anyone, including former clients
The “Welcome Back Award” – Jose Zuniga from film and TV (think Mark Sheppard, only Honduran) and Aisha Tyler of The Talk and Whose Line Is It Anyway?

Best Quotes:
1. Reid: “Windows in both residences were tampered with so he knows how to get in and out undetected.” Garcia: “Ok, that’s impressive because aluminum foil is super crinkly.”
2. Hotch: “Keep sending the baby pictures.”
3. Morgan: “Let me get this straight. You put a hit on a hit man but you went cheap?”
4. Garcia (to Dr Lewis): “Penelope Garcia. You’re marvelous.” (To Hotch) “She’s maaarrrrvelous”.
5. Dr Lewis: “2 am is my jam.”



Dominion – 2.13 - Sine Deo Nihil

By Blue Star

This was probably the busiest season finale I’ve ever watched. So much happened that it took three views in order for me to be able to write up this review. I loved that Alex had such a great display of power evicting all those 8 balls at once, and that this episode had so many important reveals from why Michael didn’t fully trust Noma to where Lucifer has been waiting all this time for his body to heal. I have a love/hate relationship with the flashbacks since they changed so much of what was previously said and diverged greatly from Legion (the reason why I checked out this show in the first place). But they were really great scenes. After everything that has happened, this show really needs a Season 3, especially since Lucifer is coming!

Grade: A

Best Reason To Watch - This episode is jammed pack with shocking reveals, action, and heartbreak
Best Scene - Noma reveals her new wings and in turn, her darkest betrayal
Most Shocking - Claire dies
Most In Love With Monologuing - Julian who keeps making long villainy speeches with no one else around. He must really like to hear himself talk.
Least Trustworthy - Noma who betrayed Gabriel, Michael, and now Alex
Biggest Ret-Con - Michael lied in 1x03 about how Charlie died to hide the fact that it was Noma who killed her. (And again, Legion is most definitely not a part of canon anymore.)
Biggest “Aw” Moment - Michael holding baby Alex. I can check that off my flashback wish list.
Biggest Relief - Gabriel is finally free of the darkness and wants to help Michael save Alex. Oh, how I missed your character growth Gabriel.
The “Survivalist” Award - David, you really are a cockroach. What does Duma want with you?

Best Quotes -
1. Gabriel: “A burial at sea doesn’t resurrect. You don’t add water and bingo - get another Lucifer.”
2. Noma: “From this day forward, the Chosen One and I are bound. My life for his. Forever.” Gabriel: “Word of advice, brother. She turned on me. How long before she betrays you?”
3. Alex: “I’m no leader. I’m not special. I’m just a man. But I can promise you one thing, if we join together we’ll kill every one of those black-eyed monsters, until we either take back our home or we burn this God forsaken city to the ground.”
4. Julian: “Haven’t been this close to oblivion before. Having my death so near I could reach out and touch it. In this time, like all those other times, I remember. I remember the whispers I heard in that dark place. Yeah, hearing my brothers and sisters, the lower angels beseeching me to fight, to hope, to believe there will be more. That you’re not alone. In a world where the tyranny of rank means nothing, where there’s no eye looking down in judgment, there’s no father to classify us, to put the few above the many, here we’re all kings. Here we can revel and rule. Do you see the future that I do and our place in it? Because I tell you my brothers and sisters, that this is just the beginning! You’re not alone.”



Heroes Reborn - 1.03 - Under the Mask

By Laura Markus

I enjoyed this episode quite a bit. I'm growing a bit anxious waiting for Hiro, Mohinder, and Matt to appear in an episode, though. But I imagine when they do, I will enjoy it quite a bit. Poor Molly, it hurts so much to see her get tortured. Come to think of it, a lot of women got beat up in this episode. Hmmm. Luke getting a power was really interesting to me. The irony will no doubt be a huge factor later on, and I can't wait to see Joanne's reaction. Quentin and Noah seriously need a buddy cop movie. Their chemistry is awesome! And their scenes are nothing short of great. I hope Tommy and his mom are okay. Still missing some of the older faces, and I'm still in denial about Rene but it was a good episode. I hope they can keep it up.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - All the different people using their powers. The wide variety of talents and skills people have make for interesting television.
Best Scene - Luke, after cooking his steak, realizing he has a power. Maybe they'll do a callback to Ted from the original series?
Funniest Scene - Quentin using his gunshot wound to allow Noah to knock out the man guarding Molly.
Most Ironic Scene - Luke, after hunting people with powers for a year with his wife, finding out he has a power.
Biggest Tease - Noah watching the security footage and realizing Hiro was there with him travelling through time.
Worst Special Effects - The "spirit" helping Malina with her power is supposed to be invisible, yet the effects clearly show her being there.
Most Unsettling Moment - Tommy and his mom getting into that car accident.
Biggest Question Raised - Aside from the obvious, "Is Claire really dead?", why is Molly so afraid of Noah? What did he do to her that would make her rather get tortured from Renautas?

Best Quotes -
1. Quentin: "I know we gotta get going, man, but I think I need to go to a hospital." Noah: "I told you I'd sew you up when we stop for gas." Quentin: "What, with like dental floss? Come on, man! I've been shot!"
2. Molly: "You really think they wanted your boyfriend to stay behind? They're gonna kill him. And if they don't, that's worse. Doing god knows what to him while they try to figure out how to turn his powers into a friggin' app. You got him killed. And now you're gonna do the same to me."
3. Quentin: "Aw, man. Now that we made it inside the Death Star on time, what do we do now? Huh? I can't exactly go in there and start showing my old Renautas ID, while you sneak Molly past security! What are we gonna do?" Noah: "Sorry." Quentin: "For what?" [Noah punches Quentin in his gunshot wound.]
4. Luke: "God, why is this happening to me?"
5. Anne: "You're not leaving this house tonight." Tommy: "Yeah?" Anne: "Yeah." Tommy: "Watch me."



Once Upon a Time – 5.01 – The Dark Swan

By Missions

The hiatus felt like forever and I was all kinds of excited to watch the highly anticipated fifth season opener of the fan favorite Once Upon a Time. Fortunately, it did not disappoint and was among my favorite returning shows’ premieres. In my opinion, it felt like the old Once Upon a Time, which I found brilliant due to my profound love of the show in its earlier seasons. Many different stories were being told in the premiere which the writers mastered very well. It continued right where it left off last season, with Emma sacrificing herself and unfortunately therefore turning dark. The writers and directors executed this very well and did a very fine job at balancing all these different yet interesting storylines. We were introduced to both Merida, who by the way has the coolest accent, and the new Camelot characters and their whole storyline in general. In Storybrooke we saw how everyone was dealing with Emma’s sacrifice and the viewers could clearly see the impact it had on every single character. In addition to that, we saw how Emma started turning dark, being taught by the one and only Dark One, and thus started to do really bad things. However she was thankfully stopped before she could actually cross some lines. Well, that is what I thought before I saw that last scene which was absolutely brilliant. Flash-forwards seem to be working extremely well this season! I am really curious to see what happened in the six weeks that let Emma turn dark in the end and why everyone but Emma forgot everything that happened in that time period. So, overall it was a very good premiere with a mixture of comedic elements, great dramatic moments and mysteries with the intention to build up storylines for the season.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - the show has really gone back to its roots and storylines are really starting to relate to each other, which they always have, however this time the writers seem to be doing it even better.
Best Scene - the flash-forward at the end of the episode, presenting a fully “dark” Emma. / Finding out that the dagger of the dark one is a missing piece of the Excalibur, showing that the Camelot storyline has always been connected to Rumpelstiltskin's.
Best Character Development - without a doubt, Emma. Everything that happened in the episode developed her character, the end in particular of course.
Best New Character - Merida of course! She had one of the coolest accents and I am really looking forward to dig deeper into her back story.
Best Cinematography/ Photography - the scene when they show King Arthur and his knights riding through the hills and through the forest. Beautiful!
Most Annoying Character - I still cannot sympathize with Henry. There is something I just hate about him and this episode certainly did not help.
Funniest Character - this goes to Regina with her hilarious and unique one-liners
Most Cringe Worthy Scene - when everyone goes to the Enchanted Forest to go save Emma – it was a bit too rushed in my opinion and therefore seemed unrealistic. / Zelina cuts off her hand and attaches it again with the use of magic which looked very fake
Worst CGI Effect - the scene when everyone enters Camelot – Once Upon a Time really needs to work on its visual effects. The Camelot they showed, looked like a version on the Wii or another video game.
Storyline I Am Most Looking Forward To - finding out why Emma became dark/ Finding out what the connection between Camelot and Rumpelstiltskin is and why he has the end of Excalibur/ Discovering Merida’s back story

Best Quotes -
1. Emma: “There’s no savior in this town anymore.”
2. Regina: “It’s not like she rode off on a unicorn. She got sucked up by a vortex of evil.”
3. Merida: “In my land, people, well men, don’t think a woman can lead." Emma: “Oh not just in your land!”
4. Leroy: “Twister!” Snow: “It’s okay, we summoned it!”



SHIELD - 3.01 - Laws of Nature

By Swanpride

The first two seasons of Agent of SHIELD were pretty much a very, very, very drawn out origin story. Consequently, my expectations towards this season are very high. After everything which was set up, it is time for some pay-off. Therefore it is a good thing that the episode jumps immediately with both feet into the action and delivers a season opener, which had me immediately on the edge of my seat. The downside of this set-up is that when the show then starts to catch up with the characters (minus May, who hasn't returned from her vacation yet and Ward), it really slows the episode down. For a while it seems like it would get bogged down in exposition - until the writers throw in some of their usual twists. Two I saw coming (Fitz is too smart to not plan for every eventuality, and the set-up in the subway smelled to much like a trap for Coulson not to be prepared). Two I honestly didn't. It was a nice surprise that Bobbi and Hunter are on the same page concerning their dysfunctional relationship after all, and quite a paradigm shift to realize that this shadowy, dangerous organization is not responsible for killing Inhumans left and right. The advertising for the show took great care to reveal next to nothing about what is coming, so hopefully, there are a lot of unexpected turns in store for the audience. In the end, the highest praise I can give a show is calling it unpredictable. One thing is for sure, Simmons lost on an alien planet is a nice little stinger for next week.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - More twisty than a ball of wool after a bunch of hyperactive kittens played with it
Best Scene - Skye (ooops, sorry, Daisy) and Mack extracting Joey
Best Character Interaction - Daisy and Mack make a surprisingly good team
Best Prop - Look, it's the Tardis!
Best Addition - Awww...the Helicarrier and the Bus had a baby! Love the new plane
Best Casually Thrown in Detail - Joey is apparently gay...yeah for more diversity
Best Effects - Every scene in which an Inhuman uses his or her abilities
Biggest Head Scratcher - Why exactly is Bobbi working in the lab? Yes, she is still recovering, but she is a trained field agent, not a scientist
Most Heart-Breaking: Fitz screaming at the monolith
The "Welcome Back" Award - President Ellis. Surprising that you are still in office after everything which has been going on during your tenure, but your presence is a nice reminder that this show is part of a larger universe.

Best Quotes -
1. Mack: "Believe me, she is the muscle."
2. Some goon: "We speak English, but you do not speak Arabic."
3. Fitz (after a terrorist offers him his life in exchange for opening a suitcase): "No Deal"
4. Coulson: "Wait, is that still KGBanter or are we being honest all the sudden?"





Blood and Oil - 1.01 - Pilot

Blood & Oil was the new drama I was least looking forward to watching. Growing up in the 80's with Dallas/Dynasty/Falcon Crest, I learned that backstabbing families get old quickly. Besides, I already watch Empire. Therefore it surprised me at how easy this was to watch. It had very little exposition as much of the pilot was show instead of tell. That's a welcome relief since so few pilots master that. It also means that the pacing was supercharged. Maybe a little too much given that the rags to riches story happened in 1 episode. I'm sure there's more rags to come but it did lead to nothing dragging here. Of course the majority of characters are despicable and that will likely be the reason I drop it in the future but for now it's a nice surprise. I'll watch a couple more episodes and see where it's going. Besides that was one heck of a cliffhanger.

Grade: B
Ranking - 4
Audience - it's obviously made for those who like nighttime soaps but it should also interest gamblers and those who like big stakes where fortunes turn on a dime

Best Reason to Watch - a lot goes on in the pilot so there is no exposition overload
Best Character - Cody
Best Actor - Don Johnson
Best Character Interaction - Billy and Cody
Best Scene - Billy and Cody negotiate with Hap and Darla
Best Cliffhanger - everyone in an oil-based fire, even though none of these characters are dying here
Best Negotiating Team - Billy and Cody, who talk Hap out of $1,100,000
Best Awww Moment - Billy toasts to his wife
Least Enviable - being Sheriff of the chaos
Least Surprising - Cody is pregnant
Most Sassy - Cody announces the douche who's trying to pick her up is there for hemorrhoid cream
Biggest Mom - Cody and her seatbelt warnings
Biggest Optimist - Billy, who after every screw up and bad luck, says they're okay
Biggest Realist - Cody, who sees the bills in the optimism
Biggest Ouch - Hap tells Wick he's never been proud of him
Biggest Douche - Wick, the dumbest spoiled brat around
Worst Choice - skimping on the insurance
Worst Place to Live - Boomtown, which makes the Wild West look tame
Worst Driver - Billy, who totals 2 cars in 35 minutes
The "Say What?" Award - Billy promises he'll do anything to take care of Cody, but it's Cody that found them a place to live AND is bringing home the bacon
The "Being Nice Pays Off" Award - the Eze's help Billy and Cody when they first get to town and when Billy and Cody strike it big, they invest in a restaurant for the Eze's
The "Welcome Back" Award - Don Johnson of Nash Bridges, Miami Vice, and the 80's / Chace Crawford from Gossip Girl / Rebecca Rittenhouse from Red Band Society / Scott Michael Foster from Greek and Zero Hour / Justin Bruening from Ringer and The Messengers

Best Quotes -
1. Darla (straightening the politician's tie): "You're a little crooked."
2. Wick: "What are the charges, Tip?" Sheriff: "Drunk and disorderly, disturbing the peace, and being a constant pain in the a**."
3. Cody: "Nice driving, Dale Junior."
4. Hap: "You think I'm gonna just toss you the keys to the kingdom and watch you drive it over the cliff?"
5. Jules: "Around here you've either got two jobs or two houses." Cody: "Yeah well, right now we don't have either."



Code Black - 1.01 - Pilot

I'm not a big fan of medical dramas, especially those in the vein of ER or the soapiness of Grey's Anatomy. I was only here for Marcia Gay Harden. While she delivered and the characters are already distinguishable (for the most part), the show was your typical overly stuffed trauma show. There's the close-ups of blood and vomit, the sickening crunch of bones being put back together, the narcissism and insecurity of the residents, and two hospital power punch storylines. We've got the baby born in less than ideal surroundings and the miracle of donor organs. Like the ER itself, this story runs like clockwork. There's the cowboy doctor (which they actually say in the pilot), the "by the book" doctor, the scared interns, and the sassy nurse. There's butting of heads, crises nearly averted, last minute saves, and a redeemed co-worker. Basically if you like medical dramas, especially those less interested in the characters' love lives and more interested in their medical prowess (thankfully), then this show is for you. If you never understood why ER was such a hit, skip it. Or better yet, just watch all the Jesse parts because he's awesome.

Grade: C+
Ranking - 2
Audience - people who like their medical dramas more gritty and less slutty…er, Doctor Sexy

Best Reason to Watch - there's about 3 episodes of story that races by in one night / Jesse and Taylor banter, which is the best of the week
Best Character - Jesse aka Mama
Best Character Interaction - Jesse and Rorish
Best Scene - Krista talks to Rorish about loss
Best Acting - Marcia Gay Harden after telling a little girl that her father is dead
Best Speech - Jesse's Mama speech
Best Cheerleading - Guthrie helping the residents feel better about their performance on the first night
Best Teamwork - Malaya talks Angus through his first life saving procedure of the night
Worst Sign - when you have to show your doctor where X-Ray is / when the director of the ER orders a barrel of morphine
Biggest Ewww - There is a lot to choose from in this episode but my biggest blech was straightening the guy's leg. Just no!
Biggest Awww Moment - You can have your traffic baby miracle birth. I'll take the stroke patient having the ability to tell his wife that he loves her again.
Most Heart Tugging - Ariel meets the girl who received her dad's heart
Most Common Sense - Taylor, who keeps the doctors from squabbling like bratty kids
Most Fun - Jesse sings "Holding Out for a Hero" by Bonnie Tyler in Footloose
Least Smart - Both doctors decide to tell this child her dad is dead without waiting for someone she knows to be with her. They needed someone who speaks Child to be with her at least.
The "Say What?" Award - Who schedules the residents' first day on the busiest night of the week? That's some truly shoddy planning.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Marcia Gay Harden from the too-soon cancelled Trophy Wife and How to Get Away with Murder / Raza Jeffrey from Elementary and OUaT Wonderland / Benjamin Hollingsworth from Cult

Best Quotes -
1. Jesse: "Clearly you don't speak the native tongue of my people - sarcasm."
2. Jesse: "People come here for one reason and one reason only. To get one last miracle. Now in your mama's house there is a #1 rule and in order that you properly obey this #1 rule, ask me all the questions you think are stupid. Why? Because you're going to be too afraid to ask daddy. So better to ask me than to violate the #1, which is that you are not under any circumstances allowed to kill a guest in my house."
3. Taylor: "You put a patient into suspended animation. How's he doing? Has he reached hyperspace yet?"
4. Jesse: "Life lesson - when asked if you want to examine your patient some more, it's like being asked if you want a breath mint. The only answer is yes."
5. Taylor: "I have eczema. It itches like crazy. You don't care, right? You know these people here, they don't care about your problems either."
6. Jesse: "For the next 3 years, I'm your mama. I'm the senior ER nurse and I can promise you there's nothing that goes on in this house your mama don't know about. Try hiding something, your mama will find out. You think you're smarter than your mama because you got an MD…well, you are not. Your mama knows when you're lying, crying, or dying and it's not only my job to teach you right from wrong but to make sure you don't leave here in three years thinking you can do no wrong."



Dr. Ken - 1.01 - Pilot

Full disclosure - Chang is my least favorite character on Community, even more than Pierce. I wasn't sure if it was the character or the brand of comedy of the actor. Turns out it's the actor. Dr. Ken is all exaggerated hand gestures and body contortions set to a laugh track to let you know when it was supposed to be funny. For the record, it wasn't. Not even a little. Everything was transparent from the time his wife was revealed to be a therapist to the moment he started yelling his daughter's name at the club. Plus the secondary characters are so one-note, it's painful. Even when it bypasses the laughs and shoots for the heart, it comes up short. I agree with an united parent front but I don't care enough about the characters to feel much of anything except a need for the clock to move faster. Damona has potential as does Allison and Molly but even Albert Tsai struggles to be anything but annoying in this one. Given his past track record, that's the true crime. It's easy to see why ABC dropped this to Friday. Given the former goldmine of a comedy in Enlisted that also debuted on Friday, it's a shame that this drivel got decent ratings while the far superior Enlisted got shafted.

Grade: D
Ranking - 1+
Audience - those who loved Jeong on Community or those whose Friday night plans got scrapped at the last minute and half the cable channels aren't coming in clearly

Best Reason to Watch - What else are you doing on Friday night?
Best Character - Damona
Best Character Interaction - Allison and Ken, since they are mostly the only extended character interaction we got
Best Scene - jail scene with Allison and Ken
Best Potential - the women except for the screechy doctor
Biggest Saving Grace - at least it doesn't have puppets
Most Annoying - the patient who thinks he's right since he read WebMD
Most Whiny - Ken
The "Fran Drescher" Award - for the single most annoying voice currently on TV goes to…Julie, whose screechy child voice did me in by the second sentence she spoke.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Albert Tsai from my much missed Trophy Wife and guest stints on Benched and Fresh Off the Boat (good comedy taste there) / Ken Jeong from Community / Dave Foley from NewsRadio / Tisha Campbell-Martin from My Wife and Kids and Martin

Best Quotes -
1. Ken: "Dave, every kid does one thing in school that they're defined by and you really don't want yours to be mime because that is an invisible box that you cannot get out of."
2. Damona: "It is nice having a daughter who trusts you." Julie: "Thank you." Damona: "You know what else is nice? Having a daughter who's alive."
3. Hector: "Julie, no one wants to hear your valid point right now."
4. Ken: "What you're experiencing is not love. It's a massive release of serotonin and other monoamine transmitters in your bloodstream, whereas real love is a struggle. An unending chess match between two opposites, constantly jockeying for control of their children and each other. That is love." Clubber: "You are my spirit animal?" Ken: "Good luck with that."
5. Ken: "Kids don't need freedom. They need…oh what's the opposite of freedom? Duct tape."
6. Pat: "Damona, I know you want to have a diversity brunch but let's face it. You're in the minority. And I will give you 2 extra vacation days if you don't report that."



Grandfathered - 1.01 - Pilot

To be honest, I was interested in this show only because of John Stamos and Paget Brewster. I didn't expect to like it because it felt like it would lend itself to the bumbling bachelor stereotypes which usually depend on poop jokes and baby vomit for humor. Instead Jimmy is a fairly competent grandfather from the beginning. I mean he changes a diaper in the first episode with no peeing in the face or diaper sliding off when he stood the kid up. Who cares if it was the wrong kid? I really like that they aren't making parenthood seem like rocket science - changing a diaper isn't that hard. They focus on the emotional turmoil of parenting instead, including the fear that every little thing is urgent and every sniffle is life-threatening. Mostly though, there isn't a character that I hated or found ultra annoying. That is rare in most comedies today so for right now this show gets my early thumbs up. Here's hoping they continue to mix heart and laughs, especially if it looks to be heading down a typical trajectory of the long-lost lovers eventually coming together again.

Grade: B
Ranking - 4
Audience - those who like their comedy family based and full of both heart and laughs

Best Reason to Watch - it's funny but it's not stupid funny
Best Character - Sara, although I like Jimmy much better than I ever expected
Best Character Interaction - Sara and Annelise
Best Scene - Jimmy confronts Sara
Best Surprise - Jimmy isn't completely incompetent at being a grandparent until it comes to having the baby in the restaurant
Biggest Oops - Jimmy changes the wrong baby
Most Awkward - the father-son hug
Most Sympathetic - I have to side with Jimmy here. He can't be expected to just welcome a surprise son and his baby into his arms when it's sprung on him with no warning. Everyone needs time to process huge, life-changing events.
Most Clever - Sara makes Jimmy think that the doctor needs to know his personal info but she's really just snooping on his vanity
Worst Plan - ambushing someone at work to tell them they are your father
Worst Prank - locking the new guy in the freezer
The "Excuse Me" Award - While Jimmy wasn't smart to bring Edie to the restaurant, he's not near as irresponsible as NOT getting a competent babysitter for your kid so you can go out on a date. Gerald, you are the big suck of this equation.
The "I Think We'd Get Along" Award - Sara gets mad at Jimmy for pointing out the logic flaws in Kramer vs. Kramer. I'm with Jimmy here. Just because it's Hollywood doesn't mean common sense must fly away. Plus why sob when you can snark?
Least Surprising - Whenever a parent says the kid will be asleep the whole time so babysitting will be easy, it's a guarantee that it will not be. / Jimmy really loved Sara before.
Best Meta / Best Music - Wouldn't It be Nice by The Beach Boys
The "Welcome Back" Award - John Stamos from Full House and ER, Paget Brewster from Criminal Minds and Community, and Christina Milian from Snowglobe.

Best Quotes -
1. Sara: "Jimmy, I hope this goes well. I do and I hate being the scolding, protective mother stereotype so I hope I only have to say this to you once. If you hurt my son or his daughter, I will choke you to death with your own overly moisturized hands. Okay, gotta run."
2. Sara: "You look great by the way. Deal with the devil really paid off." Annelise: "Yeah, I'm on her side. She's awesome."
3. Jimmy: "Listen kid, I'm a 50 year old bachelor. We're society's most worthless people."
4. Jimmy: "Everyone, what's the one thing I've always said was missing from my life?" Annelise: "A linen pant that goes from the beach to the bar." Jimmy: "Yes and the search continues. No, I meant a family."
5. Sara: "Parenthood is pretty much an endless string of moments where you think you've killed your kid."



The Grinder - 1.01 - Pilot

I wasn't sure what to expect from this show but it sure wasn't a drawn out version of the two Rob Lowe's DirectTV commercials. No, there are not 2 of them in here but the one on screen is sufficiently hammy enough to feel like there are two. Fred Savage's character doesn't come off very well either, since he is often whining. In fact, the only character I didn't feel like Gibbs' slapping is Stewart's wife, who takes her husband's petty jealousies in stride and keeps trying to boost his confidence. I think the main problem with the pilot is that they were trying to make the brothers too different. Yes, brothers are different but they are the same in many ways too. By spending so much time on the fracture, they made each character unsympathetic and this show needs to audience to buy into what they are selling. After all, it's not like any of this makes a lick of sense. There is not one courtroom on the planet that would let someone who is NOT a lawyer, question a witness in an actual trial. It's ridiculous that anyone is taking Dean seriously at all. In the end, I want to like this show because of the actors in it but the characters keep getting in the way. This is likely a marathon later show for me.

Grade: C
Ranking - 3-
Audience - fans of Rob Lowe and Fred Savage who can suspend disbelief

Best Reason to Watch - Rob Lowe and Fred Savage are back
Best Character - Debbie
Best Character Interaction - Debbie and Stewart
Best Scene / Best Teamwork - Stewart and Dean win an eviction case together
Biggest Overacting - Dean
Most Ridiculous - that any judge on the planet would allow someone who doesn't have law degree to question a witness
Most Annoying - Dean's tendency to talk in lawyer-ese and sound bites ALL the time
Worst Hashtag - #TeenLife. Never tell a teen what they need to hash tag. They are better at it than you.
Worst Negotiation - Dean leverages Lizzie's boyfriend into hanging with her little brother. Just butt out, buddy.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Fred Savage from the excellent The Wonder Years and loads of directing / Rob Lowe from all my favorite Brat pack movies in the 80's / William Devane from 24

Best Quotes -
1. Prosecutor: "Um, I have a question? Have you ever talked before?"
2. Dean: "Albert Krantz is not a menace to society. He's a menace to intelligence because the man's an idiot."
3. Stewart: "You think being cute's going to make me forget the side character thing?" Debbie: "Is it a little bit?" Stewart: "A little bit, it is. It is. Yes, it's working surprisingly well actually. You're very good at this."
4. Dean: "Wow, turns out you didn't need the cards. You were able to hurt me right to my face. Congratulations counselor, I accept your deal. I will leave. Tomorrow. At first light." Stewart: "First light? Just say morning."
5. Prosecutor: "Objection, Your Honor. Dean Sanderson is not an actual lawyer." Judge: "Oh please, this is why we're here, Leonard." Prosecutor: "Seriously?"



Quantico - 1.01 - Pilot

To be honest, I would probably have liked Quantico better if it had premiered last week. As it is now, I am already what? 4-5 big conspiracies into the TV season? I'm getting conspiracy-ed out. The good news is that Quantico has more potential than several of the others and has already delivered more plot twists. It is also likely to be more serialized than say Minority Report or Limitless. Unfortunately I have no more faith that these writers have a satisfying end game than the others. Plus the acting, while decent, isn't as topnotch as Blindspot. The flashforwards and flashbacks go both ways. It does make the story more convoluted but it also allows for better pacing and more action intertwined. In the end though, the show's success will be determined by how sympathetic and interesting Alex remains. She's started off slowly but will likely emerge as a kick butt female and I'm all in for those. Therefore Quantico gets 2 more episodes before I decide whether it becomes weekly TV, marathon, or off the list completely.

Grade: C+
Ranking: 3-
Audience - those who like political/spy mysteries and conspiracy theorists

Best Reason to Watch - the mystery is complex enough to have several twists
Best Character - Shelby, who was most quotable and Nimah/Raina, who are the most mysterious
Best Character Interaction - Shaw and O'Connor
Best Scene - Eric flips out and kills himself
Biggest Double Cross - O'Connor has Booth spying on Alex
Biggest Douche - Caleb
Biggest Shock - one of the recruits commits suicide
Most Likely to be Evil - O'Connor, so he's probably a red herring
Least Likely to be Evil - Shelby, so she's got to be the terrorist / Alex, which would be a fantastic twist but is never going to happen
Least Auspicious Opening - 2 of the characters lie to each other and have sex in a car
The "Say What?" Award - Alex killed her father, who was a special agent
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - What the heck, Simon? You don't go into a stranger's room until they invite you. Knocking and opening the door before they even tell you to come in is beyond a social gaffe.

Best Quotes -
1. Shelby: "Gender neutral uniforms. A win for equality? I'm conflicted."
2. Shelby: "So what? We do really well here, best case scenario: we end up a sexless, heartless pontificating robot." Caleb: "Worked for Hilary."
3. Shaw: "I told you to pull it together." O'Connor: "And I told you I'd try." Shaw: "Remember I'm not your partner or your girlfriend anymore, and I'm not your friend. I'm your boss." O'Connor: "Hmm. You feel a little more like a warden, which makes sense 'cause this place feels like a prison." Shaw: "You got yourself into trouble, Liam. Not me. This is the last place I wanted to see you." O'Connor: "Then why bring me here?" Shaw: "So you could keep your pension and your pride and count down the clock with some semblance of dignity."
4. Alex: "That man - if he wasn't who I knew, who was he? Was he good? Was he bad? Was he both?"
5. Caleb: "I'm not coasting on anything, Taylor Swift."






Blindspot - 1.02 - A Stray Howl

Blindspot is filling that Burn Notice-shaped hole in my TV schedule, except that Fiona would never have flipped the car. (I miss Fiona.) No show I watched had as many explosions or as much action this week as Blindspot and for that alone it has a spot on my weekly viewing calendar. It's the first new show of the season to get there. Again I thought Jaimie Alexander was a high point and Weller is growing as a character too. I even have sympathy for Reade, whom most of the fandom hates. What can I say? My logical brain agrees with him half the time. My only concern right now about the show comes from the pacing. Surprisingly, it's going too fast. If we really do know the identity of Jane by the second episode, this show is on hyper drive. Normally I would never think a show can go too quickly with its answers but I got burned badly last year by Sleepy Hollow. That show blew through 4 seasons of plot in the first season and therefore had nothing left in the barrel for the second one. For that reason, I really hope that Jane is not Weller's childhood friend. I can last a little longer to solve that mystery. Like maybe midseason.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - non-stop action
Best Scene - car chase
Best Action - Jane vs. Musgrave
Biggest Mystery - Who is Taylor Shaw?
Biggest Awww Moment - Weller finds Emily and carries her out as she hugs him
Biggest Woo Hoo - 9 minutes in and already one explosion and then another at 14 minutes and another at 24 minutes
Biggest Shock - Weller thinks he knows who Jane is already
Biggest Blindspot (pun intended) - Weller, who can't see past his childhood friend
Most Realistic - Jane worries about finding out that she doesn't like who she was in the past
Least Competent - Even if you can't understand the words, Jane, you do know he's yelling. That means something bad and you should prepare.
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - Why the heck would Weller tell his theory about Jane to his sister? Talk about jumping the gun.
The "Say What?" Award - Jane shot a nun! I don't buy it. She must have been evil
The "Sorry Fandom, but He's Right" Award - Reade brings up some great points about whether they should trust Jane's tattoos or even her already

Best Quotes -
1. Zapata: "He killed 10 innocent people this morning. Good guys don't do that." Jane: "You don't think good people ever do terrible things?" Zapata: "I think terrible people do terrible things and the good people stop them."
2. Reade: "How many civilians died?" Powers: "I'm afraid that's classified." Reade: "So a lot then."
3. Reade: "Well he didn't get that Silver Star for his charm."
4. Reade: "Oh I hope you know what you're doing." Jane: "Me too."
5. Jane: "What if I was a terrible person before all of this?" Weller: "I don't think you were, Jane. Whoever you were then, that's not who you are now." Jane: "How do you know?" Weller: "Your first instinct is to help people, Jane - the battered wife in Chinatown, Reade after the explosion today. You don't hesitate. You act and you do the right thing so I don't know what it is you're remembering or what the context is. I do think you're a good person."



Fresh Off the Boat - 2.02 - Boy II Man

One thing I really like about this season of Fresh Off the Boat is that Honey seems to have a bigger part. This is smart because as a foil for Jessica, it allows the series to showcase both perspectives. In turn, each character can smooth the other's rough edges. I thought that spotlighting the troubles of being not strict enough and being too strict was a great way to explore each character. It also lead to the best scene of the night, in which Jessica tries to comfort Eddie on his failed crush. What didn't work for me was everything else. There was far too much focus on Eddie here and his love life is the single least interesting thing about him. I find Nicole equally annoying so watching him moon over her is dead weight for me. Louis was also less interesting this time. It felt like they added this wanting a daughter subplot just so he had screen time. He's much better than that. I think their time would have been better served by allowing him to be a sounding board for Jessica's angst at losing control. That would have cut out the younger boys' lame scenes too. Plus the flashbacks, music videos, and dream sequences felt more like filler than a cohesive part of the story. The premiere was far more satisfying than this one but it was raised from a C simply because the Jessica and Honey scenes were so great. Let's see more of these.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - both Honey and Jessica grow as mothers and each have advice to offer the other
Best Scene / Best Awww Moment - Jessica talks to Eddie about her own broken heart
Best Character Interaction - Jessica and Honey
Best Dichotomy - the difference between how Jessica and Honey parent
Biggest Meta - Eddie stars in his own Boyz II Men video, complete with tormented chair sitting
Biggest Ouch - Louis' kids think they are too old for hugs
Most Bizarre - Mr. Fisher, who keeps bringing up his Asian wife for no reason
Most Spontaneous - Louis and the boys start singing End of the Road by Boyz II Men at the table
Most in Need of a Spanking - Nicole's dad for letting her rule the house like this. Be a parent, man!
Weirdest Filler - Louis' dreams of what it would be like to have a girl
Worst Alarm Clock - your mom pinching your nose so you can't breathe
Worst Reason Ever - because I said so
Saddest Statement on Society - even in the 90's they knew teaching didn't pay enough
The "Oh Jessica" Award - I'm not sure anyone else would think of Advanced Chess Strategy as a parenting book
The "I'm with You" Award - I find many of Geddes' kid flower/vegetable pictures disturbing

Best Quotes -
1. Jessica: "Why are Americans so obsessed with being friends with their children? I have no children friends." Honey: "Okay, sure but…" Jessica: "Look, your job isn't to be buddy-buddy. It's to do what's best for Nicole even if she doesn't like it."
2. Jessica: "Do you know what baby girls turn into? Teenage girls and Louis, trust me. Neither of us want that."
3. Jessica: "You know, I once had my heart broken too. When Oscar Cho dumped me in college, I was devastated. I thought I would never feel happy again. I lost weight; my grades suffered; I cut my hair. It was the worst 20 minutes of my life." Eddie: "How did you get over it?" Jessica: "I realized that life is a lot like chess. You can't win every game, but you also can't give up when you lose. You know if Oscar Cho hadn't dumped me, I never would have met your father." Eddie: "And I wouldn't be here." Jessica: "Exactly and that would be tragic. Like the 2,000 marching band scholarships that go unclaimed every year."
4. Jessica: "Children are never too old to be controlled. It's just like chess. Children are the pawns and you are the Queen, and as the Queen you control all the other pieces on the board. Then the King just stands around and takes credit for your work."
5. Jessica: "I thought you might like this alarm clock better. The lazy dog tells you when to get up."



How to Get Away with Murder - 1.02 - She's Dying

Another episode of H2GAwM and another power performance from Viola Davis. I swear the woman gets better every time. The saving grace of this episode was how many powerful scenes they put her in. It was hard to choose her best. In the end, I chose the scene where she tells Bonnie that she didn't save her. She poisoned her. I love that both Bonnie and Annalise alternate in being strong and that it gives hints as to why Bonnie is so subservient to Annalise. I hope they pursue Bonnie's background because it fascinates me. What made Bonnie damaged goods and how did Annalise come to know her? In many ways, this employer-employee bond reminds me of Scandal. I do need Bonnie to grow a backbone though because it is painful to see the way Annalise treats her in the previous scenes. Another great scene was seeing a vulnerable Annalise when she asks why Eve made the cross-examination personal. They did a good job with all the court scenes, especially setting up the prosecutor as Annalise's antagonist. I didn't expect to see a dead prosecutor in the final scene, that's for sure. Sadly Annalise couldn't be the whole show and the rest just dragged things down for me. I'm still not interested in anyone's sex life and I find Connor annoying instead of adorable like everyone else. Just shut up, Connor. Oliver is growing on me though. Not so much Rebecca's friend who is now stalking Michaela. He is as shady as they come.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Viola Davis power punching all the emotional scenes
Best Scene - Annalise tells Bonnie that Bonnie and interns all need to be saved FROM her
Best Character Interaction - Annalise and the prosecutor
Biggest Huh? - the prosecutor just lost one high profile case so they give her lead for an even bigger case?
Biggest Blabbermouth - Connor, who needs to learn when it isn't his secret to tell
Biggest Douche - Annalise
Biggest Mystery - Forget tabloid murder. I want to know why young John Winchester is hooking up with Michaela and how much he knows about Rebecca's "disappearance".
Most Righteous Anger - Nate, who keeps getting screwed over in this show
Most in Need of Shutting Up - Wes when he's rude to the landlord / Annalise with Bonnie
The "Say What?" Award - How is Oliver having unprotected rebound sex actually Connor's fault? Connor is a royal douche, yes, but Oliver makes his own choices too. I'm with Oliver on this one.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Matt Cohen aka young John Winchester on Supernatural

Best Quotes -
1. Annalise: "Now go home and don't kill anyone."
2. Annalise: "The point of this hearing was to present evidence against Mr. Lahey, not me. If that's not the case, then please charge me with my husband's murder. Though I'm guessing that hasn't happened due to lack of evidence. Instead your strategy has been to attack me with accusations and insinuations, making it very clear that this is not a preliminary hearing but a witch hunt and I did not put my hand on this court's Bible to be burnt at the stake. And especially by a petty, foolish, amateur prosecutor who doesn't deserve mine or anyone else in this court's respect."
3. Connor: "Good God, Waitlist. Just because there's no evidence that she killed the aunt doesn't make her dating material."
4. Oliver: "Hey buddy, you're not allowed to talk right now. Consider it practice for keeping your mouth shut."
5. Annalise: "You screw up again, you're gonna be the next dead body in this house."
6. Connor: "You want us, the real murderers, to go to the fake murderer's trial?" Wes: "Annalise would kill us." Laurel: "I'd kill you." Asher: "Why are we killing each other?"



Limitless - 1.02 - Badge! Gun!

Last week my biggest complaint about Limitless was that it was bent too much towards exposition at the expense of action. I still think that is a very real problem. There are far too many voiceovers trying to catch everyone up on Brian's breakthroughs and that very much slows down the pace. I realize that Limitless focuses on the cerebral but would it hurt them to add a chase scene every now and then? Even Perception had some action. Still it's good to see that the two FBI agents aren't checking their brains at the door so Brian can be the sole plot device. I like how they figured out the bomb chip in the bumper sticker on their own before Brian called them. It's part of what makes Harris the most watchable character so far. Brian sadly remains that obnoxious type of man-child, which I detest. If he doesn't start maturing soon, I will send this show to the "to be watched" pile, most likely never to be seen again. Currently I find him utterly without charm.

Grade: C+

Best Reason to Watch - Harris
Best Scene - Brian's dad tells him off for lying
Best Twist - the nurse that stitched up Brian's gunshot wound is treating his dad
Best Intuition - Harris with her car knowledge
Best Snark - Boyle
Biggest Loophole - Harris tells Brian to hire his dad as his lawyer so he can stop lying
Dumbest Plan Possibly Ever - First real day on the job and Brian demolishes a wall to escape. What. An. Idiot. Someone that smart should be able to figure out a plan that doesn't include destruction of public property.
Most Meta - Charlie Brown teacher voice
Most Annoying - all the voiceovers
Nicest Threat Ever - only Harris can talk about shooting Brian in one sentence and offer him bagels in the next
The "You're Not the Only Smarty Pants in the Room" Award - Just because Brian is on NZT doesn't mean that the others are dummies. Harris and Boyle already found the evidence Brian calls about.
The "Oh Heck No" Award - don't lie to your daddy, Brian

Best Quotes -
1. Amos: "Genghis Khan was not a good guy but I think it's a little late in the game for revenge, don't you think?"
2. Brian: "Listen you guys, it might have come to your attention that you work for a douche."
3. Dad: "There is something that you're not telling me and that's your prerogative because you're an adult but so am I and I am not going to play along when you're lying to me. You understand that?"
4. Naz: "He can do incredible things on NZT but he defines himself in opposition to institutions. I know the mindset. I raised teenagers and in the context of this department, it's dangerous."
5. Dad: "Listen Brian, are you sure this is what you want for yourself?" Brian: "It felt like an opportunity that…uh, I had no choice but to take." Dad: "That's very lawyerly of you."
6. Brian: "Wow man, you've got a morale issue. What's up, dude? Remember when you weren't going to jail 5 minutes ago. That was dope."

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.



American Horror Story -
1. Iris: "Woof." (Axy)
2. John: "Sorry I'm late. Did you get my text?" Alex: "Yes and it's clearly more considerate than you because it showed up at 6 like you were supposed to." (Dahne)
3. Sally: "I've seen what your caring looks like. We've all seen it." Iris: "Yeah well at least I care about something. You think I want to be here surrounded by junkies and decay?" Sally: "Well then why don't you leave? Go. You've been whining about the same thing for 20 years. You talk a good talk but you stick around because the truth is you like it." Iris: "No. I'm stuck in this godforsaken cesspool of pain and sh** because of you. You're the beginning and the end of all my suffering." Sally: "Good." (Dahne)
4. Alex: "I love you so much. He just looked so much like you. I see him in your face every day and I just want to die. It's not fair they took my little boy from me and I can't even look at the one person in the world who understands how I feel. I just need a break from it all." John: "You have to hope." Alex: "I can't stop hoping. That's the worst part." (Dahne)



Arrow -
1. Arrow: "Only the dead have seen the end of war." (Prpleight)
2. Oliver: "Felicity Smoak, you have failed this omelet" (Axy)
3. Damien: "You signed up to do my will. I want to know everything about this Green Arrow. I want to know where he lives and who he loves, and I want him off the boards by the time my associates arrive." (Nirat Anop)
4. Thea: "I told you guys to call me Red Arrow!" (Nirat Anop)
5. Damien: "Cities are like puppies. You see them writhing in the street, you put them down. You don't let them suffer." (Nirat Anop)



The Big Bang Theory -
1. Sheldon: "It's bad enough I'm being taken against my will. I don't see why it has to be in some hippy's mobile sex dungeon." Howard: "Well Sheldon, there's something about this van that you're going to find very interesting." Sheldon: "What? It runs on syphilis."
2. Leonard: "Guys, excuse me. Not that calling one of the Avengers isn't a perfectly reasonable choice, but we're scientists. Don't you think we can figure this out using actual science?" Sheldon: "Yes, we could use science but it's your bachelor party. Lighten up."
3. Sheldon: "Viva la Imodium."



The Blacklist -
1. Red: "I am terribly sorry for the inconvenience, but it appears we'll all be taking an extended lunch. However, if you remain calm and do exactly as I say, I promise you'll leave here with a rip-roaring story to tell your friends and families. Bon appetít." (Daniel van der Veer)
2. Red: "That's Polaris, the North Star. That's how sailors used to find their way home. When I look at you, that’s what I see. I see my way home." (Daniel van der Veer and Dahne)
3. Red: "You haven't the slightest clue how to speak to a woman, have you? Now, my friend there and I are having a very important discussion. So you just sit tight, enjoy your muffin, and if I hear you say anything other than "please" or "thank you" to Carly, I'm gonna drag you into the men’s room and wash your mouth out with soap. And if that doesn’t work, I'll cut your filthy tongue out with that butter knife. Is that clear enough for you?" (Daniel van der Veer and Dahne)
4. Ressler: "I was ordered to let Keen go and I did. I wasn't ordered to let her die." (Dahne)
5. Gerard: "Let the record reflect that I am complying under duress and that my 4th amendment right to privacy is being violated." Navabi: "As is my right not to be nauseated." (Dahne)



Criminal Minds -
1. Garcia: “One man’s cowardice is another man’s wise risk aversion.” (Emma)
2. Garcia: “Charlie reminds me of the color beige.” (Emma)
3. Garcia: “His internet search history…hot magma of homicidal rage doesn’t even begin to cover it.” (Emma)




CSI: Cyber -
1. Russell: "You always do that? Bury the lead." Nelson: "Aw, he loves the attention. You know in his mind this is the bridge and he's Captain Kirk." (Dahne)
2. Avery: "Well if he's Obi-Wan, I want to be Yoda." (Dahne)



The Flash -
1. Henry: "Do you think...Can you be all that you are becoming with me here?" Barry: "You're the only family I have left." Henry: "Well, that's not really true. Don't you have another family in this room? They need your help, too, Barry. When you need me, I will be here. But right now Central City doesn't need you to be Henry Allen's son, it needs you to be The Flash. My Kid, the superhero. I have to go. I need you to tell me that it's OK." (Ben L)
2. Cisco: "You expecting trouble?" Joe: "Cops always expect trouble. In this city, I expect super evil flying monsters." Cisco: "That's a solid expectation."
3. Caitlin: "You carry a handkerchief now. What are you? 80?"
4. Joe: "You can be sad, Barry. Your parents will understand if you're not strong all the time. That is why I'm here. It's okay, son. I've got you."



Fresh Off the Boat -
1. Eddie: "Why is Shaq selling a car he can't even fit into?"
2. Louis: "Nice. Basketball-shaped tequila." Shaq: "It seemed like a good idea at the time."
3. Eddie: "Dad, he's not going to be there. It's a licensing deal. They pay the Diesel a bunch of money to slap his name on something. Shaq Fu."



The Goldbergs -
1. Barry: "So does this mean you forgive me for ruining your tapes?" Beverly: "Of course. Look I know it's crazy how much I love them but they just remind of a time when you still needed me." Barry: "Mom, look at all the stuff you do for me. Everything I am is because of you. I'll always need you."
2. Beverly: "This is all your fault Phil Donahue, gorgeous white-haired b**."
3. Adam: "Goodbye R-2 and 3PO. I guess you were not the droids I was looking for."



The Good Wife -
1. Ruth: "Mrs Florrick, you're not paying for this, the campaign is." Alicia: "Yes, and they're not paying for me. I'm volunteering." (Darth Locke)
2. Eli: "When you were polling nothing, when you were banging your Ethics Coordinator, your freaking Ethics Coordinator! I stood by you." (Darth Locke)



The Grinder -
1. Deb: "So in trying not to be a fictional character from your brother's television show, you're letting our real-life kids do whatever the hell they want and we think this is a good idea?"
2. Dean: "Guys, it's okay. She didn't like the show. But out of curiosity, Ms. Lacoste, what exactly didn't you like about it?" Claire: "Well, um, it was just a little melodramatic and cheesy, you know. And totally unrealistic when it comes to actually practicing law in any way. Does that make sense?" Stewart: "That makes perfect sense."
3. Ethan: "Dad, this is a big episode. They have to reset the whole premise." Dad: "And that's a hard thing to do." Dean: "In a graceful way, very difficult and we didn't follow up the pilot as well as we should have. You know what? We lost a lot of our audience because of it." Stewart: "Are we sure that's why?"



Heroes Reborn -
1. Noah: "Molly, I'm just here to help." Molly: "People have been telling me that my entire life. But all they wanna do is use me for my power. You should understand that better than anyone." Noah: "I'm not proud of my past, you know if I could change it-" Molly: "Forget about the past, Noah. This is about so much more than you, and me, and June 13th. I was there in the hospital when your daughter died." Noah: "What happened?" Molly: "We all knew what was at stake, and we agreed to do whatever was necessary, to keep them safe. Erica tried to take everything from me. But I was strong. I was really strong. And I didn't give her the location." Noah: "Of what?" Molly: "If I tell you, you won't go back. And then, we're all dead anyway." Noah: "You're not making any sense." Molly: "I can't stop Erica, but I will not let her kill seven billion people." Noah: "Molly, put the gun down, and let's talk. Okay? You're the only one who can tell me what happened on June 13th." Molly: "Forget the past, Noah. Save the future." (Laura Markus)
2. Farrah: "Watch yourself, child. I know grown men who would shake in their boots if they knew the fate of the world was in their hands." Malina: "Good thing I'm not a grown man." (Laura Markus)
3. Quentin: "Look at these people, they're digital sheep peddling their free bikes, eating their precious free sushi. Completely blind to everything that's going on around them." Noah: "You worked here for almost a year before you said anything." Quentin: "It's really good sushi." (Laura Markus)



How to Get Away with Murder -
1. Annalise: "Get me some chocolate chip cookies, I hate all this healthy food!" (Daniel van der Veer and Laura Markus)
2. Annalise: "Do you want to keep your business or do you want to go to jail for being a negligent slut?" (Daniel van der Veer)
3. Bonnie: "I made you promise not to see Frank, and then I go and hook up with Doucheface? And the worst part, I fell for that putz!" (Daniel van der Veer)
4. Oliver: "You've changed." Connor: "Yeah, 'cause of you." (Laura Markus)
5. Caleb: "I was comforting her." Annalise: "With a kiss? That's not how I comfort my siblings." (Laura Markus)



iZombie -
1. Ravi: "Her new is New Hope, not Final Hope. You know this. If I wanted to give her a depressing name, I would have gone with Phantom Menace."
2. Gilda: "We've located the instrument of their destruction." Vaughn: "Is that my cue to start cackling manically or shall I wait for you to provide the details?"
3. Liv: "Great. I'm grossing out a rat."



The Last Kingdom -
1. Ravn: "So, who have they been killing below?" Udtred: "Prisoners. Just now, a king." Ravn: "Did he die well?" Udtred: "No." Ravn: "Well, then he shouldn't have been king." (Sandi)
2. Ravn: "Tell me your name." Uhtred: "Udtred. I'm the Ealdorman of Bebbanburg." Ravn: "You are, eh?" Udtred: "I am. I own lands to the north." Ravn: "How long have you been an Ealdorman of these lands? Your father chose to fight us and is now dead." Udtred: "He, he was not fond of me." Ravn: "I now understand why my son spared you, Uhtred of Bebbanburg. You are a warrior. Have some ale. Drink it. Lots of it." (Sandi)
3. Ragnar: "You laid hands on my daughter. You stripped her naked." Sven: "Half-naked, lord." Kjartan: "He's at an age, lord." Ragnar: "Is this true? Half-naked?" Udtred: "Yes, lord." Ragnar: "Then I shall only take his one eye." (Sandi)



Life in Pieces -
1. Jen: "I cannot believe you are getting a night away." Greg: "I'm going to jail. This is not night away."
2. Matt: "Don't ever get in the middle of an argument between Jen and mom that starts with 'I hear you.' The subtext is always 'I'm the one who loves Greg more.'"
3. John: "I haven't been this disappointed since you wanted that magician doll last Christmas." Greg: "It's a Darth Vader action figure." John: "It had a cape and a magic wand." Greg: "It's a light saber, Dad."



Limitless -
1. Sands: "You belong to Mr. Morra now, which means you belong to me." (Darth Locke)
2. {imagined) Rebecca: "You ran like a rabbit, and now you're gonna die like a snake!" (Darth Locke and Laura Markus)
3. Brian: "So I'm wondering does she likes me or does she like me on the drug?" Harris: "They're the same guy." Brian: "Absolutely not. Not true. NZT Brian can do way more stuff than regular Brian. What?" Harris: "There aren't two Brian's. There's you. Sure you can do more when you're on the pill but either way it's your character." (Laura Markus and Dahne)
4. Brian: "Honestly, I'm nervous about this whole thing. I am, okay? And I just…you know what I want to say? What I should say is thank you." Shauna: "For what?" Brian: "For being a good person. I mean you stuck with me for a long time and I know it was hard. I was really down." (Dahne)
5. Harris: "If she's interested in you because of what you can do instead of who you are, then she isn't worth your time. And if she isn't, then you're worried about nothing." (Dahne)



OUaT -
1. The Dark One: “As long as the Dark Ones existed, one thing has always held us back. The pull of the family we were so desperate to protect. The friendships that make it impossible to forget who we used to be. The magic that threatens to undo our most evil deeds. And, worst of all, the love that refuses to give up on us.” (Nirat Anop)
2. Grumpy: “Snow Queen, Pan, Trio of Terror. We can handle villains like that but Emma. She knows how we beat the bad guys. Heck, she beat most of them for us." (Missions)
3. Regina: “I should be figuring out how to free Merlin, not fox trotting my way across Club Medieval." (Missions)
4. Regina: “If you’re dumb enough to cross the line, be my guest.” (Missions)



Quantico -
1. Liam: "You better pray Agent Booth corroborates your story when he gets out of surgery 'cause if he doesn't, I am putting your face all over the news. You won't last a day in the wind." Alex: "A day is all I need." Liam: "What are you gonna do?" Alex: "I'm gonna find the needle." (Samy Bgs and Ben L)
2. Booth: "You ever think your trust issues impact your ability to see clearly. You read my file. What does it say?" Alex: "Unlike you and these e-mails, I don't believe everything I read." (Dahne)
3. Alex: "The exercise was built on information provided to us by you, but information is only worth anything if you trust the source that it came from. So I went back to the rooms to see what I hadn't seen before. You were playing us and you even left clues in each room to taunt us." (Dahne)
4. Shelby: "How are you guys not exhausted? It's like we have the Olympics in the morning and then we have to pass the Bar every afternoon." (Dahne)



Scorpion -
1. Sylvestor: "I was nearly drugged and choked to death today. All less scary than your driving." (Prpleight and Dahne)
2. Sylvestor: "Amusement parks, funhouses, a store near my home called “Le Sexy Hutch”, and theme restaurants. all places I will not voluntarily walk into but number one on my list is prisons.” (Prpleight)
3. Molina: "Your team did fine work." Cabe: "I wish I could say the same for you." Molina: "Excuse me." Cabe: "You were willing to sacrifice one of my team to make your case." Molina: "I was thinking about 3 members of the federal judiciary." Cabe: "You were thinking about what would look worse for you - three dead judges or one dead kid. I'm a Marine. No man left behind means something to me." Molina: "My hope was to protect everyone involved." Cabe: "Don't try to politic your way out of this. I don't trust you anymore. I will never put my people's lives in your hands again and if that costs me my job, so be it. Some things are more important." Sylvester: "Thanks, Cabe." Cabe: "We're a team, right? Family."
4. Sylvester: "I have a limit of one death per day."
5. Toby: "Voila, a near perfect mimic of death. The pulse is active but undetectable with breathing more shallow than the cheerleaders of my high school."



SHIELD -
1. Ward: "What is the point of a boat if you never take it out of the dock? It's like camping in the living room." (Swanpride)
2. Coulson: "This is why I got rid of all the S.H.I.E.L.D. logos in our vehicles. It's like screaming for attention." Bobby: "You know, there's an ginormous eagle symbol on top of our jet." (Swanpride)
3. Hunter: "Fitz, you absolute beauty!" (Swanpride)



Supernatural -
1. Sam: "Saving people means ALL of the people, Dean. Not just that baby. Not just each other. I unleashed a force on this world that could destroy it to save you." Dean: "I told you not to." Sam: "And I'd do it again in a second. I would do it again. And that is what I'm talking about. This isn't on you. It is on us. We have to change." Dean: "What are you thinking?"
2. Dean: "We were hoping you could tell us what kind of DEFCON Screwed we are."
3. Jenna: "Show me some skin." Dean: "Heh?" Sam: "What?" Jenna: "Both of you." Dean: "This like a Magic Mike moment?"

Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV. I hope your TV week was as good as mine was. I'm a big fan of CW premiere week and this week's nomination was Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, which is a personal favorite. If you have a show to nominate, please fill out the short form below. No need to add weekly shows. I use a number generator to randomly pick the nominated episode and next week it will be the Nashville pilot. Since I've never seen an episode of Nashville before, it should be fun. While I'm still horribly behind already, having no pilots debut helped me catch up on a few shows and a few more look to be heading for cancellation. Hopefully none of your favorites. A big thanks again to our guest reviewers for adding more shows to discuss. I appreciate all of them and you for reading. Until next week, happy TV viewing.









Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog - all 3 parts

I adore Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog so much that I watch it every year. Therefore, it was pure pleasure to review this web mini-series. For those unacquainted with the show, Neil Patrick Harris plays a villain trying to get into the Evil League of Evil. He keeps getting thwarted by the most douchey superhero ever, Captain Hammer, played by Nathan Fillion. Rounding out the trio is Felicia Day, who plays love interest to both. Yeah, there's a love triangle. Yeah, I despise love triangles to my core. Nope, it doesn't matter one jot in the pure pleasure this show gives me. I even suffer through watching this thing on iTunes. Trust me, that's a big deal. Still it's not for everyone. It's definitely a spoof driven mostly by NPH monologues, so if you're not into him it will be non-starter for you. Plus it's a musical, which for me makes everything better but your mileage may vary. There's also zero budget for special effects. If you can take it for what it is, a bunch of creative people passing away the writers' strike and having a little fun, it's fantastic. In fact, it is what Scream Queens tried to be but failed in that it takes a tired genre (superheroes) and pokes fun at it through exaggeration but still maintains its heart.

If you're still with me but still hesitant, at least try it out. After all, all 3 parts together clock in at slightly under 45 minutes so it's the length of your average TV drama these days. Plus Nathan Fillion does his best work here. I confess that I'm usually not of fan of his work because he often comes off as overly hammy to me. However, that's exactly what his part needs as the bully disguised as a superhero. He also has a decent singing voice so no fear of the bumps that Once More with Feeling had. Felicia Day is also a marvel as the wide-eyed ingénue just trying to make the world a better place. The original geek of the three leads, she has her own web series called The Guild but this is my favorite role for her with Charlie from Supernatural being second. Not only does she have great pipes for this but it's a sweet role that enhances the other two. Still it's Neil Patrick Harris' show. He's simply stunning as the super villain with a heart and a desire to make the world a better place - through ruling it. In 40-ish minutes, he becomes a more complete character than many TV show characters do after multiple seasons. In the end though, the real hero and star is the dialogue. It's sharp and crisp like the very best of Joss Whedon. It even inspired one of my favorite TV phrases - "What a crazy, random happenstance." Do yourself a favor and check out Dr. Horrible. You may just find yourself making it a yearly tradition like me, despite the cheesy low-grade special effects.

Grade:  A-

Best Reason to Watch - the Whedon-written sparkling dialogue
Best Scene - Horrible goes bad after Hammer gets with Penny
Best Song - Brand New Day (lyrics wise, not special effects wise)
Worst Song - So They Say
Most Fun Songs / Best Things Ever - the Bad Horse henchmen interludes
Best Character - Billy / Dr. Horrible
Best Section - Act 2
Best Acting - Act 3
Best Reaction - Dr. Horrible to Captain Hammer talking about curtains
Best Dichotomy - Dr. Horrible and Penny's different viewpoint on human nature in the song "My Eyes"
Best Headline: Country Mourns What's-Her-Name
Best Guest Appearance - Simon Helberg, who had only 8 episodes as Howard on The Big Bang Theory before the writers' strike during which this was created
Best Cameo - Marti Noxon, who took over Buffy
Best Exaggeration (not character) - Horrible's oversized chair of evil
Best Atmosphere - the music during "Slipping"
Biggest Douche - Captain Hammer
Biggest Agreement - neither Moist nor I are at all into Horrible's cheesy catchphrases
Least Effective - Hammer stops the heist only to let Dr. Horrible take off with the cargo because he's too busy flirting with Penny
Most Hammy - Nathan Fillion
Most Cheesy - the special effects
Most Interesting Date - Penny takes Captain Hammer to the homeless shelter for dinner
Most Quotable - "What a crazy, random happenstance."
Most Optimistic - Penny's Song
Most Scary - the fangirls and fanboy, who act like internet fangirls and fanboys
Strangest Potential Gift - Australia
The "Don't Kiss and Tell" Award - Captain Hammer really needs to learn when to shut his mouth. Like now.
The "If I Laugh, Am I a Terrible Person?" Award - "Everyone's a Hero" is such a tacky, offensive, and completely funny song

1. Horrible: "How are things with cheesy on the outside?"
2. Horrible: "You're kidding. What a crazy, random happenstance."
3. Horrible: "I'm not gonna kill a little kid." Moist: "Smother an old lady?" Horrible: "Do I even know you?"
4. Hammer: "But home is where the heart is / So your real home's in your chest."
5. Horrible: "I saw Penny today." Moist: "You talk to her?" Horrible: "So close. I'm just a few weeks away from a real audible connection."
6. Horrible: "I want to do great things, you know. I want to be an achiever like Bad Horse." Penny: "The thoroughbred of sin?" Horrible: "I meant Gandhi."
7. Bad Horse Henchmen: "He saw the operation you tried to pull today / But your humiliation means he still votes nay / And now assassination is just the only way / There will be blood and it might be yours / So go kill someone. Signed, Bad Horse"
8. Penny: "He's a really good looking guy and I thought he was kind of cheesy at first." Horrible: "Trust your instincts."





Quantico - 1.02 - America

Now that is more like it. I was iffy on the premiere, but I really liked this follow up. It had the best pacing of the week. Mostly I enjoyed the combination of brains and action, which is helped along by the mixture of past and present scenes. Those can be tricky to sell to an audience but I thought they were very well done here. In fact, they are the reason that this episode narrowly surpasses The Flash premiere to become my show of the week. By switching up the timeline, nothing has time to get stale or frustrating. It also helps that every single person in this show is hiding something, giving us a wealth of suspects and for once I have no clue which one it is pointing to. As long as the writers do, I'm good with getting the information piecemeal and in hints - provided none of them are too long drawn out. So far so good on this front. I'm also pleasantly surprised by how intriguing the training at Quantico has been. I thought that would be the part to drag but the puzzles are complex enough to keep me actively engaged as a viewer. If the show continues in this vein, it will become the second new show to make it on the weekly viewing list.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - every single person here is hiding something so everything is suspicious
Best Scene - Alex shows everyone up in the Quantico test
Best Action - Natalie vs. Alex
Best Logic - Alex realizes that no public school teacher can afford first class anything so Liam is tricking them
Best Addition - Natalie Vasquez, who pushes Alex to be better in everything
Best Twist- Shaw already knows about the twins
Biggest Douche - Caleb, still. I don't care about his little rich boy woes.
Least Competent - The FBI because Alex goes across the street from her own apartment to collect evidence and the FBI have no one outside to see her…or to keep someone from entering the crime scene, which she does when the team pulls out
Most Unsettling - Someone put a fake wall in Alex's bathroom to get easy access to her apartment
Worst Plan - Natalie finds Alex in her apartment but doesn't call for backup immediately once Alex locks herself in the bathroom. By trying to be a hero, she just looks incompetent.
The "Say What?" Award - Caleb is now an analyst? How does a washed out party boy get that gig? Oh yeah, his family connections.
The "How Does This Help?" Award - Why would Booth say Alex shot him? Wouldn't it make more sense to say that he couldn't see anything and allow them to fill him in on what they know about Alex? You can pretend to think someone's guilty without adding fake evidence to the fire.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Rick Cosnett, formerly Eddie on The Flash (RIP buddy)

Best Quotes -
1. Booth: "You ever think your trust issues impact your ability to see clearly. You read my file. What does it say?" Alex: "Unlike you and these e-mails, I don't believe everything I read."
2. Alex: "The exercise was built on information provided to us by you, but information is only worth anything if you trust the source that it came from. So I went back to the rooms to see what I hadn't seen before. You were playing us and you even left clues in each room to taunt us."
3. Shelby: "How are you guys not exhausted? It's like we have the Olympics in the morning and then we have to pass the Bar every afternoon."
4. Liam: "The needs of the Bureau…" Shaw: "Funny, they never finish that sentence but we somehow always know what they mean."
5. Shaw: "Evidence lies. Information can be spun. Your intellect may have gotten you here but it will be your instincts that will make you special agents. This exercise was set up for you to fail. Use it. Learn from it."





Criminal Minds - 11.02 - The Witness
By Emma

Last week’s premiere was firing on all cylinders. This week - not so much. It wasn’t a bad episode per se. The acting was great, especially by guest star Tim Kang; I was just bored. There was no mention of the hit man group so now I’m not sure if that really was a set up for a season long arc or the writers were just pointing out that Morgan really hates being blown up. Dr. Lewis is meshing well with the team but overall there was very little humor, no sassy Rossi at all, and even Garcia seemed subdued. The COTW had some great twists but it still lacked a sense of urgency. To steal a quote from Garcia, this episode was just beige.

Grade: C+

Best Reason To Watch – COTW had a great twist on a typical cheating spouse storyline
Best Scene – Charlie completely flips out on the Unsub over the phone (Tim Kang knocked it out of the park here)
Best Character Interaction – Lewis and Reid discussing “Synchronicity”
Best Teamwork – the whole team, including the local FBI agents the BAU is working with, figures out that Charlie is indeed a killer, just not the one they are looking for
Worst FBI Job – watching six weeks of security footage from bus stops
The “Wait, When Did That Happen” Award – When did Reid get fish?
The “Welcome Back” Award – Marisol Nichols from 24 and Tim Kang from The Mentalist

Best Quotes –
1. Garcia: “One man’s cowardice is another man’s wise risk aversion.”
2. Garcia: “Charlie reminds me of the color beige.”
3. Garcia: "His internet search history…hot magma of homicidal rage doesn’t even begin to cover it.”
4. Reid: “You’d be surprised what someone with a broken heart will do.”



Heroes Reborn - 1.04 - The Needs of the Many
By Laura Markus

Based on how sad the episode made me, I thought I was going to give it a terrible review. For the tears I shed, it deserved an F. But in reality, it was a really well done episode, the best of the entire show so far. Every character seemed to be a bit more fleshed out. We finally got to see Malina and Farrah, Luke and Joanne are at an emotional crossroads, Tommy's in trouble, Taylor has disbanded from working with her mom and has joined forces with Noah and Quentin, and more. I think they dealt with certain issues very well (Luke's apparent depression and how he first reacted to killing people, Molly killing herself for the greater good, etc.). However, Tim Kring's obsession with killing off characters who appeared on the original series is going too far. Two are already dead. If he touches Matt Parkman, I might have to prepare my pitchforks.

Grade: A

Best Reason to Watch - Molly's sacrifice. She ultimately killed herself for the greater good, to save everybody. It'll make you cry, but it's worth it.
Best Scene - Joanne finding out Luke has a power and her reactions.
Funniest Scene - Yet again, a Quentin and Noah scene.
Biggest Tease - Noah's reference to Sylar.
Best Indirect Reference - The scene of Luke and Joanne's tearful fight was oddly similar to that of Chuck and Sarah from Chuck.
Creepiest Special Effects - The bodies of EVOs are being contained in Renautas, but there were just so many of them! And the way they were set up! Super creepy.
Saddest Moment - Molly's death scene. RIP - I will miss you.
Best Callback - Tommy asking, "You ever get the feeling you were meant to do something extraordinary?"

Best Quotes -
1. Farrah: "Watch yourself, child. I know grown men who would shake in their boots if they knew the fate of the world was in their hands." Malina: "Good thing I'm not a grown man."
2. Quentin: "Look at these people, they're digital sheep peddling their free bikes, eating their precious free sushi. Completely blind to everything that's going on around them." Noah: "You worked here for almost a year before you said anything." Quentin: "It's really good sushi."
3. Quentin: "If they're really sucking out Molly's power, they're probably doing the same thing to Phoebe. Turning her into some kind of...like, a shadowblaster, or something. [...] What? It's a thing. It could be a thing. You don't know!"
4. Joanne: "Things change, Luke. You gotta keep changing with 'em."
5. Quentin: "That's the guy that took my sister. Or, at least, one of them is." Noah: "Hit the ground on the count of three." Quentin: "Wait, what?" Noah: "One." Quentin: "What if they know where she is?" Noah: "Two." Quentin: "I hate your face, Bennet."
6. Luke: "Remember the first one we killed?" Joanne: "Of course." Luke: "Afterward, you were so content. You were so blissfully satisfied. I have never seen anyone sleep so soundly. I spent the rest of that night hunched over a toilet." Joanne: "Why are you saying this now?" Luke: "We lost our son, Joanne. For the last year I've been so terrified that I would lose you too. And the truth is, I have lost you. I have lost myself. We have lost each other." Joanne: "I really did love you."
7. Noah: "Molly, I'm just here to help." Molly: "People have been telling me that my entire life. But all they wanna do is use me for my power. You should understand that better than anyone." Noah: "I'm not proud of my past, you know if I could change it-" Molly: "Forget about the past, Noah. This is about so much more than you, and me, and June 13th. I was there in the hospital when your daughter died." Noah: "What happened?" Molly: "We all knew what was at stake, and we agreed to do whatever was necessary, to keep them safe. Erica tried to take everything from me. But I was strong. I was really strong. And I didn't give her the location." Noah: "Of what?" Molly: "If I tell you, you won't go back. And then, we're all dead anyway." Noah: "You're not making any sense." Molly: "I can't stop Erica, but I will not let her kill seven billion people." Noah: "Molly, put the gun down, and let's talk. Okay? You're the only one who can tell me what happened on June 13th." Molly: "Forget the past, Noah. Save the future."



Once Upon a Time - 5.02 - The Price
By Missions

The season premiere was already amazing; however, this episode was just excellent! Last week’s episode ended with a flash-forward, taking place six weeks after everyone had entered Camelot and presenting a full dark Emma to us, the “Dark Swan”. In “The Price” those two stories were being told at once, on the one hand in flashbacks we could slowly see how things developed once the whole crew entered Camelot and on the other hand, how in Storybrooke they were trying to retrace their memories while the Dark Swan revealed secrets of her own and moved the storyline rapidly. So much happened in this episode that it's difficult to decide where to start. The biggest surprise to me in this episode was Fury taking Robin and the entire team trying to save him which thankfully happened! Damn, that scene was all kinds of epic. We had many great character interactions, my favorite being the one between Regina and the Dark Swan where she tells Regina about “The Price”. Jennifer Morrison is doing an excellent job at portraying someone that dark yet deep down so hurt. Additionally, I thought it was adorable how Mary and David tried to teach Regina how to dance before everything went to hell at the actual ball. However, the highlight of this episode was definitely the ending in my opinion. The Dark One’s monologue leading to the reveal that the Dark Swan also brought the Excalibur to Storybrooke and finally to the scene where she TRIES to pull it out of the stone in order to reconnect it with the dagger. Absolute perfection, the scene gave me goose bumps! Overall, it was a fantastic episode with tons of character development, interesting interactions and more mysteries setting up the fifth season which seems like it could be my favorite season after of course the exceptional season 1. I completely adore this show and am loving the direction they are going in. Kudos to the writers and directors.

Grade: A

Best Reason to Watch - Everything that happened in this episode, lol. The Dark Swan is absolutely creepy and intriguing. The Camelot storyline is very interesting and I think it will lead up to something big.
Best Scene – Everyone saves Robin to stop Fury (amazing scene!!) / The Dark One’s ending monologue leading up to the Dark Swan trying to remove Excalibur from the stone which gave me goose bumps and definitely left me wanting more.
Best Character Development – Like last week, both Emma and the Dark Swan. Yes, actually both were different characters this episode. Emma had great character development back in Camelot when she saves Robin and the Dark Swan in Storybrooke as well, of course!
Character That Is Starting to Grow On Me – What a surprise, Henry! Finally, I thought this episode he was not as annoying as usual. The whole love interest thing is a bit weird to me but could go in the right direction.
Favorite Character - Regina! I love Regina and I think it is really interesting to see her wanting to be the “Savior”. Besides, her one-liners are priceless.
Most Cringe-Worthy Scene - When David stabs Percival with his sword yet there is no blood on his sword. That makes no sense. They really need to work on such aspects. Every aspect counts!
Best CGI Effect – Everyone saves Robin and stops Fury. While not the best, I thought it was far better than most of the effects on the show. They also really have to work on that.
The “Eye Candy” Award – I know this is a weird award, but for me it goes to Hook and David. They are both so handsome and I realized it again in this episode!! Regina is stunning as well.
Storyline I Am Most Looking Forward To - Seeing if the Dark Swan can actually remove Excalibur from the stone and reconnect it with the dagger. / Of course finding out how Emma became dark. / Finding out more about Merlin’s state /And last but not least, to see if Regina can indeed become the “Savior”.

Best Quotes –
1. Grumpy: “Snow Queen, Pan, Trio of Terror. We can handle villains like that but Emma. She knows how we beat the bad guys. Heck, she beat most of them for us."
2. Regina: “I should be figuring out how to free Merlin, not fox trotting my way across Club Medieval”
3. Regina: “If you’re dumb enough to cross the line, be my guest.”
4. Emma: “You want to believe you’re the savior then step up and do what needs to be done.”
5. Hook: “I spent over a century trying to find a way to kill the bloody crocodile. I can spend at least that long trying to save the woman I love.”
6. Regina: “I could kill them with the swipe of my hand.”



SHIELD - 3.02 - Purpose in the Machine
By Swanpride

"The Well" is one of my least favorite episodes in season one (which is saying something), and the aspect I like the least about it is Professor Randolph. I really like the actor, but I feel that he was miscast for this particular role, which in itself borders on annoying. So while it is nice to know that everything we have seen in the show can become relevant again at any point, I was kind of nervous going into the episode.
I shouldn't have worried. The show runners did more or less everything right. They start out with a cold opening which immediately had my attention since it was so unexpected, and then, to my great surprise, the episode continues exactly where it left off last week. And like last week, there is still some catching up to do. We learn what May and Ward have been up to and a lot of time is spent on character studies of the various team members. I'll be honest here, the science treasure hunt in the episode feels a little bit contrived and too many pieces fall into place a little bit too conveniently, but the build up to an incredible gripping rescue scene is so well done that it doesn't really matter. It is rare that a show can suck me in that well. In my mind I knew that Fitz would most likely succeed, but the whole scene was so well staged, I was trapped in a rollercoaster of emotions and enjoying every second of it. I can't wait to see what the show has in store next.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - A perfectly paced plot with a satisfying climax.
Best Scene - Is there any doubt? Fitz rescuing Simmons is not just the best scene of the episode, it is one of the best the show has ever done.
Best Character Interaction - The team pulling a distraught Fitz away from the Monolith. Oh the feels!
Best Character Moment - A traumatized Simmons snuggling up to Fitz
Best Reaction - Hunter, when he learns that Simmons is safe
Most Creepy - Ward, who has apparently decided to quote Garret's peculiar wisdom to the next generation of Hydra recruits.
Best Addition - Ward's new "protégé". My prediction - he will eventually betray Ward and take over.
Best In-Universe Commentary - Yeah, Baron von Strucker was wasted in more than one sense of the word in Age of Ultron. Hopefully the show has better use for his son.
Biggest Head Scratcher - What was the point of Professor Randolph in prison? Just some unfunny jokes?

Best Quotes -
1. Ward: "What is the point of a boat if you never take it out of the dock? It's like camping in the living room."
2. Coulson: "This is why I got rid of all the S.H.I.E.L.D. logos in our vehicles. It's like screaming for attention." Bobby: "You know, there's a ginormous eagle symbol on top of our jet."
3. Hunter: "Fitz, you absolute beauty!"





American Horror Story: Hotel - 5.01 - Checking In

Nope. Just nope. Even with Matt Bomer, this is not a show for me. I find the excessive nudity and gratuitous, graphic violence…well, excessive and gratuitous. So much so that it distracts from what could be a very interesting tale. Of course that also supposes the show would spend more time in the flashbacks because they really were the most interesting part of the premiere. The present day stuff dragged on in an already overly long episode, causing the pacing to be stuck in the mud. By about 20 minutes in, I was staring at the clock wondering if the Countess had stopped time too. Still the visuals, minus the wannabe Hannibal-death art, were stunning and whoever made the sets should be lauded because they are fantastic.

Grade: C-

Best Reason to Watch - the back story of Donovan and Iris and Sally
Best Scene - flashback to Donovan's death
MVP - set designer for these lavish hotel sets
Best Character - Iris
Most Intriguing - the Countess
Best Horror Trope - creepy, silent kids in the hall
Best Matched Couple - Donovan and the Countess, who not only have synchronized sex but they also synchronize their kills
Best Room - the kids' videogame room
Most Likely to Get Hired as Cruella De Vil - the Countess
Most Shoddy Police Work - if he thinks it was a credible threat, then why didn't he call the police on patrol to get there first and bring back up
Stupidest People on Earth - the couple that goes back to the hotel for the orgy / the kid who gets out of the police car
Worst Pre-Death and Orgy Decision - sharing needles
Weirdest Casting - Lady Gaga
The "Nope, No Way" Award - I don't care if there was no room in any inn, I would not stay there ever. Ever.
The "Say What?" Award- Matt Bomer is Kathy Bates' son in this one? Who knew?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Matt Bomer, who I miss terribly as Neal Caffrey on White Collar
Best Music - Downtown by Petula Clark
Most Obvious Music - Hotel California by the Eagles

Best Quotes -
1. John: "Sorry I'm late. Did you get my text?" Alex: "Yes and it's clearly more considerate than you because it showed up at 6 like you were supposed to."
2. Sally: "I've seen what your caring looks like. We've all seen it." Iris: "Yeah well at least I care about something. You think I want to be here surrounded by junkies and decay?" Sally: "Well then why don't you leave? Go. You've been whining about the same thing for 20 years. You talk a good talk but you stick around because the truth is you like it." Iris: "No. I'm stuck in this godforsaken cesspool of pain and sh** because of you. You're the beginning and the end of all my suffering." Sally: "Good."
3. Alex: "I love you so much. He just looked so much like you. I see him in your face every day and I just want to die. It's not fair they took my little boy from me and I can't even look at the one person in the world who understands how I feel. I just need a break from it all." John: "You have to hope." Alex: "I can't stop hoping. That's the worst part."
4. Liz Taylor: "I'm sorry. This is a no-tell motel."
5. Countess: "Messes are always forgiven…the first time."



TBBT - 9.03 - The Bachelor Party Corrosion

I think I'm picking the wrong TBBT episodes to review because last week's was vastly superior to both the premiere and this episode. The biggest problem with this one was that it was boring. I guess some might find the 32 different ways to NOT get a lug nut off entertaining but I kept wondering why they didn't just call the girls, who could look online for a Mexican tow truck. Worst case scenario, sleep in the van until morning. The girls' night in wasn't any more exciting except we saw Penny's dad again for the first time in what? 5 years? This episode felt like it was an hour long. Good thing episode 9.02 was utterly charming and funny. Otherwise, I would have backburnered TBBT by now.

Grade: C

Best Reason to Watch - Penny's dad comes back
Best Scene / Biggest Laugh - Sheldon sings "We Will Rock You"
Least Surprising - the van goes up in flame
Biggest Shock - I'm with Sheldon. Being kidnapped by friends and taken to some unknown place for the weekend does not sound like fun. I'm too old for that. Give me a place and I'll give you an agenda.
Worst Plan - everything they did besides call the girls to say they have a flat, who could have then called someone in Mexico to help or come to get them
Worst Sign - Sheldon tells Leonard to lighten up. Sheldon.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Keith Carradine (as Penny's father) from Dexter and Deadwood

Best Quotes -
1. Sheldon: "It's bad enough I'm being taken against my will. I don't see why it has to be in some hippy's mobile sex dungeon." Howard: "Well Sheldon, there's something about this van that you're going to find very interesting." Sheldon: "What? It runs on syphilis."
2. Leonard: "Guys, excuse me. Not that calling one of the Avengers isn't a perfectly reasonable choice, but we're scientists. Don't you think we can figure this out using actual science?" Sheldon: "Yes, we could use science but it's your bachelor party. Lighten up."
3. Sheldon: "Viva la Imodium."
4. Bernadette: "Really? They didn't eat him?" Penny: "No, he was a beloved member of the family." Bernadette: "Breakfast meat family?"
5. Raj: "Dude, how many races can you offend in a single breath." Howard: "I don't know. Have you watched the Olympics with me?"



Blacklist - 3.02 - Marvin Gerard

I am utterly fascinated by how much Lizzie is breaking down in this situation. Her almost killing the abusive husband in the diner reminded me a bit of when she had Tom locked up. (By the way, woo hoo that he is back! He's one of my favorite characters.) Liz has always been a collected character so the times in which she is not are her most interesting. Plus it improves her relationship with Red, who is acting full on like a father now. I adored both scenes where he acted like a papa. The first when he snaps Lizzie back into control in the diner and also when he looks on her with so much love as she is starting to hate herself and what's she's become. It was beautifully acted. I also like Ressler better in this one. I respect his desire to catch Liz but I loved how he was willing to risk everything to make sure she wasn't killed first. He's also playing very smart these days. What with figuring out Red's plans twice now. The only thing this episode needed more of was Aram. Otherwise it was well paced with good character bits and moved the story slightly along.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - Lizzie continues to fall apart and lean more on Red
Best Scene - Red tells Lizzie to knock it off
MVP - music director
Best Awww Moment - Red tells Lizzie that she's his way home
Best Character Interaction - Red and Lizzie
Best Reason to be Employed by Red - your pension plan includes a vacation home in an anti-extradition island country
Best Twist - Red got them out on a barge
Best Kidnapper - again Red charms as he's holding people at gunpoint
Coolest Invention - the pantry elevator
The "About Time" Award - Cooper is finally in his rightful position as head of the division without blackmail hanging over his head, especially since he turned down the pension
The "Back Off Now" Award - Solomon, I hope Dembe kills you. You suck out loud.
The "Welcome Back" Award (Character) - Tom Keen, woo hoo!!!!
The "Welcome Back" Award (Actor) - Fisher Stevens, formerly guesting on just about everything
Best Music - Our House by Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young

Best Quotes -
1. Red: "That's Polaris, the North Star. That's how sailors used to find their way home. When I look at you, that's what I see. I see my way home."
2. Ressler: "I was ordered to let Keen go and I did. I wasn't ordered to let her die."
3. Gerard: "Let the record reflect that I am complying under duress and that my 4th amendment right to privacy is being violated." Navabi: "As is my right not to be nauseated."
4. Red: "You haven't the slightest clue how to speak to a woman, have you? Now, my friend there and I are having a very important discussion. So you just sit tight, enjoy your muffin, and if I hear you say anything other than 'please' or 'thank you' to Carly, I'm gonna drag you into the men’s room and wash your mouth out with soap. And if that doesn’t work, I'll cut your filthy tongue out with that butter knife. Is that clear enough for you?"
5. Navabi: "You've been briefed?" Gerard: "Rousted out of bed, cavity searched, shackled, transported like livestock - yes. Briefed - no."



CSI: Cyber - 2.01 - Why-Fi

I'm one of the few people who really enjoyed CSI: Cyber last season. Sure it had its flaws and its overly preachy moments, but it had more action than any show about computers has a right to have. I found the crimes interesting and I liked all of the characters by the time the show went on hiatus. This new season starts rough though. First it never explains who the random CSI export is or what he's doing there. Since this is the only CSI that I watch, I was left baffled. He doesn't appear to be taking Simon's place so I'm even more confused. Second, the crime wasn't as intriguing as I would expect from a premiere. This felt like more of a run of the mill episode that could easily have been a third or fourth installment with the exception of Krumitz. For better or worse, CSI: Cyber lives or dies on its case so I wish it had chosen something more action driven. On a positive note, they did spread the attention around so it wasn't Avery-focused. It gave each side character a storyline, even if Raven and Nelson get stuck with the hidden love trope. Blech! Raven deserves so much better.

Wish List:
1. Less overly dramatic explanations
2. More Elijah, more Raven
3. No more series explanation voice over
4. Less fear mongering in general
5. Keep up the interesting info on everyday tech

Grade: C+

Best Reason to Watch - they did a good job of giving everyone a little bit of focus
Best Character Interaction - Avery and the little girl
Best Scene - Krumitz finds out his sister was stalking the guy she shot, not the other way around
Technology to Fear of the Night - any of your child's toys that use wi-fi
Best Friend - Nelson, who is worried about Krumitz even when he snaps at him
Best at Working with Kids - Avery with her doll talk technique
Biggest Hmm - Elijah tells a random bartender about his fathers' cancer
Biggest Shock - Nelson and Raven are together
Biggest Jedi - Nelson
Least Defined - Ted Danson's character. I don't even know why he was in this.
Most Missed - Simon Sifter
Most Like a Frat - cockroach racing
Most Odd - vacuum as eye witness
Most Creepy - A talking doll that helps thieves break into your house. As if a talking doll wasn't creepy enough on its own.
Most Out of Left Field - Ted Danson and Elijah's dad's cancer
The "Whoa, That was a Lot of Exposition" - the opening scene with Ted Danson, whom I vaguely remember was on some other CSI show, feels like a 4 month recap
The "Welcome Back" Award - Ted Danson from Cheers and Becker

Best Quotes -
1. Russell: "You always do that? Bury the lead." Nelson: "Aw, he loves the attention. You know in his mind this is the bridge and he's Captain Kirk."
2. Avery: "Well if he's Obi-Wan, I want to be Yoda."



The Flash - 2.01 - The Man Who Saved Central City

The Flash and iZombie are my two favorite comic-based shows on TV. In fact, they may be the only ones I still like. Having them back makes my TV week. While iZombie disappointed in its premiere, The Flash came back as entertaining as ever until the very end (which knocked it out of the running for best show of the week). I was worried when Barry was trying on the lone wolf outfit. There are far too many emoangsting heroes on TV these days so Barry's optimism and reliance on teamwork over douchery is refreshing. To see him embrace the flip side was heartbreaking. Therefore I am very happy that they created a 6 month time jump. It allowed him to be all emoangsty away from my eyes and actually gave Iris a purpose for being on screen, kind of. She's still pretty peripheral. As always the Joe and Barry scenes were the highlights. Henry however seemed completely out of character. He's been separated from Barry for so long already. Now he's voluntarily keeping them apart? No way. They should have just made Henry a regular and added him into the team. After all if Barry has 2 dads, we all win.

Grade: B+

Wish List:
1. Make Iris NOT completely useless and a waste of time OR kill her. Either one.
2. The vortex cannot be a reset button. Many fan theories include how things will be so much different now that Wells was never born so he couldn't go back into the future so Barry's mom won't be dead so Barry will be a completely different person so……so the theories alone are giving me a headache. Playing with time travel sucks everything up. I'd prefer to pretend it never happened and keeping going with things as usual. Logic issues be damned. (CHECK)
3. Don't break it - the tone and camaraderie is what makes The Flash unique in a world of dreary comic worlds. Don't mess with the optimism and humor levels.
4. Give us a smart villain like Wells was and can the hokey cartoonish ones.
5. Keep the core relationship between Joe and Barry and not romantic ones. (CHECK)

Best Reason to Watch - things get back to their normal entertaining levels fairly quickly so we're not in Guiltville for too long
Best Scene - Henry is released from prison and reunites with Barry. Got to love free father hugs. Also double father hugs.
Best Character Interaction - Joe and Barry of course
Best Advice - focus on the people and not the property when starting to rebuild
Best Snark - Cisco as always
Best Laugh - the new villain, because hoodies are all the rage in cyborg fashion these days
Best Parenting - Joe lays it on the line to Barry, whether he wants to hear it or not
Biggest Awww - Joe hugs a crying baby Barry
Biggest Huh? - Since when does Barry have a Bat signal?
Biggest Ouch - Way to discount Joe and everybody else who has been a part of your family since your mom died, Barry? You have plenty of family and your dad just adds to it.
Biggest Shock - Wells confesses to the murder of Barry's mom so that Barry's dad can go free
Biggest Mystery (For Those Who Don't Comic Book) - What's a Zoom?
Biggest Clue - unless that background crescendo of "this is important" music is wrong, mystery guy must be introducing the spin-off…already
Most Interesting Promotion - Cisco is now working for the police department. Those 2 things just don't seem to go together.
Most Incongruous - sullen kid Barry feels like a retcon given what we've heard about him in season 1
Most Heartbreaking - Everyone blames themselves for Ronnie's death. I blame the writers and producers. Bring back Ronnie.
Most Confusing - I DO NOT get it. What the heck was that? Why in the world can't Barry be Henry's son and the Flash? I mean he's been both for awhile now. This is one very lame reason to get Henry off screen and I deserve some Barry-Henry time as much as Barry does. With all that we know about Henry, this makes not one iota of sense unless there is some underlying other stuff going on. Barry can have 2 dads. He should have 2 dads. I don't understand this twist one iota.
Worst New Game - Bowling for Cops, using police cars as the bowling ball
The "AGAIN, There's NO Cone of Silence" Award - nothing like spilling Barry's secret identity in a room full of cops, Cisco
The "Say What?" Award - 6 months later and now all of Central City is talking metahumans? I feel like I've missed some big steps in the local psyche.
The "Not Them Again" Award - I am sure that Wentworth Miller and Dominic Purcell are decent actors but Captain Cold and Heat Wave are such Arrow-level cartoon villains that I can't help but eye roll in anticipation of all the cheesy dialogue headed my way.

Best Quotes -
1. Cisco: "You expecting trouble?" Joe: "Cops always expect trouble. In this city, I expect super evil flying monsters." Cisco: "That's a solid expectation."
2. Caitlin: "You carry a handkerchief now. What are you? 80?"
3. Joe: "You can be sad, Barry. Your parents will understand if you're not strong all the time. That is why I'm here. It's okay, son. I've got you."
4. Cisco: "According to the coroner's office, Al Rothstein's body was in the morgue all night so we can scratch off zombie attack."
5. Cisco: "Professor Stein, you are a genius." Stein: "I believe that's already been well-established."
6. Barry: "Alright guys, I don't want any of you here right now." Joe: "Tough. You need your partners. You need your friends." Iris: "Barry, everyone in this room cares about you, but we also care about this city. We all want to make a difference and that means fighting metahumans and that means working with the Flash. You can't deny us that. Not anymore."



Fresh Off the Boat - 2.03 - Shaquille O'Neal Motors

If I were judging this against other comedies, it would be pretty decent but I judge it against other episodes of Fresh Off the Boat and this one just wasn't very funny. I think the manager roulette thing was supposed to make me laugh but it didn't. Instead that whole section coasted on the Shaq guest appearance and some sweet moments between Jessica and Louis. Thank goodness for these because they brought most of the heart to the show. Eddie realizing how much Evan's Beanie Babies meant to him was another golden heart moment. So thumbs up on the heart but let's not forget to bring the laughs along with it next time.

Grade: B- (average of bigtime heart and few laughs)

Best Reason to Watch - the heart
Best Scene / Biggest Awww Moment - Eddie gets Evan's Beanie Babies back
Best Visual - tiny Jessica shaking Shaq's hand
Best Maneuvering - Luis gets Jessica to haggle car prices again
Best Use of Being Bilingual - Jessica and Louis fake fight to get higher up the managerial rung
Worst Nostalgia - the Beanie Baby craze
Least Surprising - the head manager is Shaquille O'Neal
Most Missed - Honey
Most Sympathetic - I can't imagine trying to buy for Jessica so I feel for Louis
Most Over Dramatic - Jessica, if the biggest mistake of your life was not getting the free floorboards, then you very, very lucky. Hang on to that.
Biggest Jerk - Eddie sells Evan's beanie babies

Best Quotes -
1. Eddie: "Why is Shaq selling a car he can't even fit into?"
2. Louis: "Nice. Basketball-shaped tequila." Shaq: "It seemed like a good idea at the time."
3. Eddie: "Dad, he's not going to be there. It's a licensing deal. They pay the Diesel a bunch of money to slap his name on something. Shaq Fu."



The Goldbergs - 3.03 - Jimmy 5 is Alive

I am getting increasingly frustrated with the ABC comedy suggestion that kids are always right and parents need to give into them. Here again we have Adam getting his way because he sulked about something. That's terrible parenting and the idea that susceptible parents are watching this and getting ideas terrifies my teacher heart. Just stop. I love this show but always giving kids what they want is not helping anyone and it makes for lousy TV. The fact that the only Goldberg child I could stand in this episode is Erica shows just how off the rails things have gotten. What happened to logical consequences and smart parents? That being said, the final Beverly and Barry scene was so sweet that it raised the final grade an entire grade level for me. That's the heart I want out of The Goldbergs. Now if they could balance it better.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - Beverly and Barry trying to cheer each other up
Best Scene / Biggest Awww Moment - Barry tells Beverly that he's always going to need her
Best Character Interaction - Erica and Adam
Best Save - Barry lets Beverly hug him to avoid her finding out that he taped over his 5th birthday party
Best Nickname - Mellor calls Adam "Muppet Boy"
Best Return - Barry's funky run
Best Cheerleader Mom Ever - Beverly
Worst Parenting - Why the heck is Murray suddenly giving in to his kids ALL the time? It started last season and now it is getting super annoying. Good parenting does NOT mean buying your kids the stuff they want because they sulk about it. Urgh!
Biggest Brat - tie - Barry and Adam are both obnoxious and annoying
Biggest Filler - the montages
Biggest What The Heck - Wine coolers are a hobby? Since when?
Most Anachronistic - Did anyone in the 80's use the word "bro"? I don't remember that.
Most Pun-ilicious - Barry
Most Cringeworthy - Murray calls the robot "robit"
The "I Feel for You" Award - Pops is stuck in the middle of Adam and Murray
The "Say What?" Award - Mellor, I don't think you know how VHS works
The "I Still Don't Get It" Award - the Weather Channel
Best Music - Forever Young by Rod Stewart

Best Quotes -
1. Barry: "So does this mean you forgive me for ruining your tapes?" Beverly: "Of course. Look I know it's crazy how much I love them but they just remind of a time when you still needed me." Barry: "Mom, look at all the stuff you do for me. Everything I am is because of you. I'll always need you."
2. Beverly: "This is all your fault Phil Donahue, gorgeous white-haired b**."
3. Adam: "Goodbye R-2 and 3PO. I guess you were not the droids I was looking for."
4. Erica: "Everyone else moves on to real hobbies like sports and boys and wine colors, and I was still sniffing the Straw."
5. Mellor: "Third graders out. You are of no use to me until you develop adult bodies that can play something besides tag."
6. Pops: "I liked it better when you hated everything."



Grandfathered - 1.02 - Dad Face

This show has great potential and I really liked the pilot, but it needs to stop insinuating that Jimmy must drop everything to cater to Gerard's wishes or else he is a bad person. On the flip side, Jimmy needs to stop being pressured into doing things and then making everyone uncomfortable by obviously not wanting to be there. Plus the pacing of this was way off. Loved the side plot with Sara and Vanessa though and Annelise still rocks.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - Vanessa
Best Scene - Sara appreciates Vanessa after Vanessa tears into a drum circle for tossing a bottle near her baby
Biggest Buzzkill - possibility of the woman you're about to screw ending up being your daughter
Biggest Hmmm - Not sure about using your granddaughter as a pickup line. That seems rather shady.
Most Manipulative - Ravi talks Jimmy into attending family day in hopes of getting his White Party ticket
Worst Dichotomy / Filler - clips of the family vacation interspersed with the White Party
The "I Don't Get It" Award - Why is everyone always down on Jimmy when he can't drop everything and do what Gerald wants? Give him a few dates to choose from.

Best Quotes -
1. Gerard: "You know family is just an endless stream of exhausting cr** that makes you feel like the least cool person on earth but you do it because you love your kid and because sometimes you get these amazing moments, like watching her go into the ocean for the first time which I'm not going to miss just explaining this to you."
2. Sara: "Hey, I know you have a tremendous, soul-killing crush on her." Gerard: "Sure do." Sara: "Can I ask why? Aside from the fact that she's the mother of your child and that." Jimmy: "Look, it's like an M. Night Shyamalan movie, you know? You think you've got it all figured out. Then bang! You know it hits you with a crazy awesome surprise you never saw coming." Sara: "So Vanessa's been dead the entire time."
3. Gerald: "You guys ready? Jimmy said he'll be here any minute." Sara: "Just so you know based on when I was dating him, that could mean anything from he'll be here soon to we'll never see him again."
4. Jimmy: "You know what? I wrote down this really smart observation. Hold on one second. It's like…um, it's like those people are the ones in cages." Annelise: "You were driving and you stopped to write that down?" Jimmy: "Yeah." Annelise: "Hmm."
5. Gerard: "Wow, you really do have skinny legs. I'm glad I got mom's. Her's are more…" Sara: "There's no good way to finish that."



iZombie - 2.01 - Grumpy Old Liv

Maybe it was my high expectations for the return of one of my favorite new shows, but this could be the worst episode of iZombie yet. It committed a cardinal TV sin. It bored me. The case was uninspiring and watching Liv be a douche to everyone was not as much funny as it was painful. I also hate the further deconstruction of Major's character and the fact that Peyton is MIA. Let's hope that is temporary. Starting Liv in such a low place dragged down the mood almost as much as her temporary brain-eating personality. All in all, it was missing the fun and quirkiness of season 1 although it started off brilliantly. I loved the beginning banter between Ravi and Liv. Sadly, it quickly devolved into a slow moving mess where I didn't care who the killer was because they were almost guaranteed to be better than the victim. Here's hoping this episode is just a fluke.

Grade: C

Wish List:
1. Keep adding the fun and snark
2. Give Liv some more unique brains to munch on
3. Fix the rift between Liv and Peyton
4. Keep giving us great moments between Ravi and Liv
5. At the end of the season, have Clive learn about zombies and kill off Blaine

Best Reason to Watch - the season can only go up from here
Best Scene - Ravi and Liv in the morgue
Best Character Interaction - Ravi and Liv
Biggest Ouch - Liv's brother wakes up in the hospital and tells her to go away
Biggest What the Heck - Major is now being blackmailed to kill people
Least Surprising - Gilda is Liv's new roommate
Most Handy - internal zombie detector that makes your hair stand up on end when they're near
The "That's Not Ironic; It's Lame" Award - hipster t-shirts
The "Not You Again" Award - Vaughn, who should be in prison and off my screen by now
The "Missed You" Award - Peyton

Best Quotes -
1. Ravi: "Her new is New Hope, not Final Hope. You know this. If I wanted to give her a depressing name, I would have gone with Phantom Menace."
2. Gilda: "We've located the instrument of their destruction." Vaughn: "Is that my cue to start cackling manically or shall I wait for you to provide the details?"
3. Liv: "Great. I'm grossing out a rat."
4. Blaine: "Somewhere out there, Major Lilywhite - the most presciently named zombie of all time - roams the earth." Liv: "Whitey Shamblemore begs to differ."
5. Clive: "Haven't you heard? That stuff will rot your brain." Liv: "I think we're too late."



Life in Pieces - 1.03 - Sleepy Email Brunch

This is my favorite episode of Life in Pieces so far, largely because I liked all of the segments for the first time. The second was really rough at first but by the time they got to the end where Tim helps out Heather, it was golden too. The best segment was the family dinner where everyone meets Colleen, largely because of the nonverbal acting. Everyone's surprise at Joan's taking Colleen's hands was confusing and then sweet. The polite battle between Joan and Jen felt spot on. I loved how Greg is caught in the middle and his face when he loses his bacon is shattered. Plus this episode may be the very first time that any fictional character on TV rooted for the St. Louis Rams. Props to the home team even if they suck. While this comedy is not appointment TV, I see enough potential to keep it on the to-watch list as I have time.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - it's the first time I liked all four segments
Best Scene - Colleen meets the family
Worst Babysitter - Calliope
Most in Need of the Cutting Room Floor - Tim's bowel issues that were not funny at all
Most Repulsive - the Quick Mart's shriveled up hot dogs with flies buzzing around them
Most Intense - Joan when the Rams lose…so all the time
Most Inappropriate - Tim's swinger jokes
Least Likely to Get a Job as a Landscaper - any of the second generation with their remote-controlled espresso machines
Best Shout Out - St. Louis Rams
The "There are No Winners" Award - if it's a war between your wife and your mother, you are just screwed
The "It's Always a Bad Sign…" Award - when you think of jail as a night off
Best Music - Holding Out for a Hero

Best Quotes -
1. Jen: "I cannot believe you are getting a night away." Greg: "I'm going to jail. This is not a night away."
2. Matt: "Don't ever get in the middle of an argument between Jen and mom that starts with 'I hear you.' The subtext is always 'I'm the one who loves Greg more.'"
3. John: "I haven't been this disappointed since you wanted that magician doll last Christmas." Greg: "It's a Darth Vader action figure." John: "It had a cape and a magic wand." Greg: "It's a light saber, Dad."
4. John: "This used to be a do it yourself country. Generation App, that's what you boys are. Hey you want to see an app? Here's an app. You use it when you can't find your nuts."
5. Greg: "I've got to admit. That was fun. I've never chopped down a tree before." Jen: "You still haven't. Tree guy's coming on Tuesday and your chiropractor appointment is for Wednesday."



Limitless - 1.03 - The Legend of Marcos

That was the best episode of Limitless so far and it is all because of the improvement in Brian. The case of the week was paper thin but that was actually a good thing because it allowed more time for Brian to grow up. And he desperately needed to grow up. I found this more humble, caring, and approachable Brian to be far superior to the man-child he has been so far so hopefully they keep this transition moving forward. I also loved the introduction to Colin Salmon's character. I adore Salmon every time I see him so I'm excited that he's finally shown up on Limitless. His character is appropriately menacing and it makes Morra seem even shadier than before. I have no idea if he's a good guy or bad guy now but he does have reach. If they don't drag out Brian's secret from Harris for too long, this is a great new layer. Basically I am more excited about Limitless than I have been so it gets 2 more episodes before I decide whether to marathon it or not.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Brian is sympathetic, caring, and NOT a selfish douche throughout the entire episode
Best Scene - Harris pep talks Brian in his apartment
Best Character - Harris for her wisdom
Best Character Interaction - Harris and Brian
Best Nostalgia - Miami Vice
Most Fun with Post-It Notes - Brian's post-it note crime scene mockups
Most Threatening - Mr. Sans
Most Likely to Tell You Like It Is - Agent "Mike" who pretty much tells Brian to stick it
Most Improved - Brian
Worst Jigsaw Puzzle - putting together someone's shredded documents
Weirdest Filler - the faux drug legend movie
Best Filler - the date
Least in Love with Their Job - Mike and Ike, who bodyguard Brian at his brattiest
Least Surprising - the task force is corrupt
Best Meta / The "Welcome Back" Award - Analeigh Tipton, who played Jake (Brian) McDorman's love interest on Manhattan Love Story
The "Welcome Back" Award - Colin Salmon, who was one of the best things about Arrow

Best Quotes -
1. Brian: "So I'm wondering does she likes me or does she like me on the drug?" Harris: "They're the same guy." Brian: "Absolutely not. Not true. NZT Brian can do way more stuff than regular Brian. What?" Harris: "There aren't two Brian's. There's you. Sure you can do more when you're on the pill but either way it's your character."
2. Brian: "Honestly, I'm nervous about this whole thing. I am, okay? And I just…you know what I want to say? What I should say is thank you." Shauna: "For what?" Brian: "For being a good person. I mean you stuck with me for a long time and I know it was hard. I was really down."
3. Harris: "If she's interested in you because of what you can do instead of who you are, then she isn't worth your time. And if she isn't, then you're worried about nothing."
4. Brian: "Sergeant Moore, keep it real…or don't. Keep it however you want to keep it."
5. Harris: "We're at the relationship advice stage?" Brain: "Well we kind of have to be. The only people that know the details of my life work at the FBI. You are by far the most normal person at the FBI so you're really the only person in the world I can talk to about this stuff."



Scorpion - 2.03 - Fish Filet

After last week's disappointing episode, it is good to have Scorpion back in all its glory. They just cannot go wrong when they devote the episode to Sylvester and this one was even better than the cruise ship episode from last year. In many ways, this is Sylvester's crowning moment in character development. Although he has been placed in increasingly intense situations throughout the series, this time he is largely on his own, unable to communicate with his team. Plus he has to confront a plethora of fears because let's face it. Prison would scare anyone. While largely focusing on Sylvester, both Cabe and Toby had shining moments as well. I loved Cabe's speech more than anything else in this season so far. He stood up for his family to his boss and laid down the home truths that Molina needed to hear. How are they supposed to trust her in the future if she leaves one of the team to rot in jail and die? That's some shoddy leadership there. I also loved Cabe teaching Toby to punch. It was such a father-son moment and right when Toby needed it. The only drawbacks to this episode was the Ralph interlude, who is still more irksome than cute.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - it's all about Sylvester
Best Scene / Best Speech - Cabe tells off Molina for being willing to let Sylvester die as long as they completed the mission
Best Character / Best Problem Solver - Sylvester
Best Use of a Fire Hose - Happy, who saves them all from the shady guard
Best Dad Moment - Cabe teaches Toby how to punch
Biggest Ouch - Toby's face after seeing Chet
Best New Addition - Ray, who could add humor as an occasional guest star
Biggest Laugh - Sylvester doing an egret bird mating ritual to show Megan he loves her
Most Kick Butt - Sylvester saves himself from Ten-Ton
Most Incredulous - the look Sylvester gives Ray
Worst Place to Stop - right in front of the cell of the guy who's trying to kill you
Worst Trash Talker - Sylvester, who manages to sound scared stiff while he does so
Worst Return - Ralph, who needs to be talked about but never seen
Worst Pun-ing - Ray
Worst Plan - In an episode with fake suicide overdoses and prison breaks, the worst plan is Ray's involving adult men in their skivvies lathering up with Crisco. I'll take an order of brain bleach immediately.
The "Say What?" Award - since when can prisoners just walk down the hallways whenever they want
The "That's a Sure Sign of Friendship…Or Being a Cult Leader" Award - Toby knows just what to say to talk Sylvester into a fake suicide
The "Too Much Shakespeare" Award - Toby's Romeo and Juliet drug plan
The "I'm Team Sylvester" Award - No one had any right to ask so much from Sylvester and then to basically keep him there beyond his will. I did like how it gave us so much Sylvester time though.
The "Famous Last Words" Award - "You'll be fine." That's never a good sign

Best Quotes -
1. Molina: "Your team did fine work." Cabe: "I wish I could say the same for you." Molina: "Excuse me." Cabe: "You were willing to sacrifice one of my team to make your case." Molina: "I was thinking about 3 members of the federal judiciary." Cabe: "You were thinking about what would look worse for you - three dead judges or one dead kid. I'm a Marine. No man left behind means something to me." Molina: "My hope was to protect everyone involved." Cabe: "Don't try to politic your way out of this. I don't trust you anymore. I will never put my people's lives in your hands again and if that costs me my job, so be it. Some things are more important." Sylvester: "Thanks, Cabe." Cabe: "We're a team, right? Family."
2. Sylvester: "I was nearly drugged and choked to death today. All less scary than your driving."
3. Sylvester: "I have a limit of one death per day."
4. Toby: "Voila, a near perfect mimic of death. The pulse is active but undetectable with breathing more shallow than the cheerleaders of my high school."
5. Paige: "Are you holding up okay?" Sylvester: "I am in prison, Paige, about to be killed. Would you like to start with a new question?" Paige: "Sorry. Good news is we're getting you out of here. Bad news is it's through the morgue."
6. Paige: "Walter, maybe this is a mistake. No offense but I just don't want Sylvester's life in the hands of a guy who lives in a Gremlin."



Supernatural - 11.01 - Out of the Darkness, Into the Fire

I'm still leery about Supernatural after the debacle that was seasons 8 and 9, aka the Screw You Carver Years. So I always approach SPN with caution now. However season 10 fixed Sam, or at least stopped throwing him continually under the bus and what I've heard about this season is promising. I love the idea of the brothers together on a common mission, side by side. That's what first attracted me to Supernatural and their brother bond is the core upon which everything else is built. If they can continue to move forward together, this could be a great year. The season 11 premiere did its job of setting up the Big Bad and creating enough twists to move the pacing forward. While I don't like the idea that Sam is infected, it should give him great opportunity to be the Smart Sam of the first few seasons. More importantly, I am glad Sam addressed the key issue of how the brothers have somewhat fallen away from the primary objective. I love that they brought up the family motto again. This is the kind of arguing I can stand between the brothers because it is mission focused and they came to consensus instead of it being about tearing each other down. This is the maturity I am looking for in their characters. They do have to stop repeating old patterns like Sam said if the show is going to keep going, but they need to do it together and in a way that is true to the characters. For once, Jeremy Carver didn't screw things up. Well, not yet.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Reunited and it feels so good. I love when the brothers can argue WITHOUT being in a contrived brother rift
Best Scene - Sam reminds Dean that the family motto starts with "Saving people" and then "hunting things"
Best Addition - Jenna, I hope you come back and maybe intern under Sheriff Jody
Best References - Magic Mike and 28 Days Later
Best Call Back to a Previous Season - the whole set up reminds me of Croatoan, which I love
Best Reason to Look Before You Lock - Sam traps himself in with a creeper
Biggest Shock - baby Amara has the Mark of Cain and yet another child on SPN gets ultra creepy
Worst Shock - Sam is infected
Worst Plan (As Proven by 10 Previous Seasons) - Sam, keeping secrets has never worked for any Winchester ever. Tell your brother what's happening.
Worst Shots - the dead dog family can't shoot Cas even though he's 20 feet in front of them
Worst Sign - Older than Death? Yikes! That can't be good.
Worst False Hope - at first I thought Sam was protected by The Darkness too so I was happy when the creepers walked away
Worst Birth Day Gift - the mark of Cain
Most Catchy - the new opening title card
Most Disappointing - the opening song feels too tame musically for all that happened in season 10
The "Say What?" Award - Dean and the Darkness are bound. Hmm, what does that mean? Is this another killing one means killing the other thing? Is Dean under her spell? Can he physically not hurt the Darkness or is it less literal than that?
The "I'm with Sam" Award - it is time to get back to the family motto with its emphasis on saving people
The "I'm with Dean" Award - I'm all for you doing what you do, Sam. Right up until it means getting yourself killed. I draw the line there. You're too important to play bait.
The "Scene to Launch a Thousand Fan Fics" Award - Dean talking about Magic Mike
The "No Thanks" Award - Close-up of a dead, fly-ridden dog? Nope, just nope.
The "This Never Ends Well" Award - Dean, stop getting chatty with the Big Bad. It didn't work with Ruby. It won't work here.
The "Thank Goodness for Small Favors" Award - Crowley is still alive
The "Ooh Me, Pick Me" Award - Sam asks, "When did we forget how to do this?" That's easy. When Carver took over and forgot what the show is about.
The "Oh How I've Missed You" Award - Baby, you're looking fine. And I missed the Winchesters too.
The "It's Your Turn" Award - seems like a brother goes missing every season
The "Nope, I Still Don't Care" Award - nothing about angels interests me at all, making everything Cas completely fast forward-able to me
The "I Can't be the Only One" Award - when Dean starts talking about how the brothers were the lock and key, I immediately thought of The French Mistake

Best Quotes -
1. Sam: "Saving people means ALL of the people, Dean. Not just that baby. Not just each other. I unleashed a force on this world that could destroy it to save you." Dean: "I told you not to." Sam: "And I'd do it again in a second. I would do it again. And that is what I'm talking about. This isn't on you. It is on us. We have to change." Dean: "What are you thinking?"
2. Dean: "We were hoping you could tell us what kind of DEFCON Screwed we are."
3. Jenna: "Show me some skin." Dean: "Heh?" Sam: "What?" Jenna: "Both of you." Dean: "This like a Magic Mike moment?"
4. Sam: "When did we forget how to do this?" Dean: "What?" Sam: "Dean, if we don’t change right now, all of our cr** is just going to keep repeating itself." Dean: "Okay, I…I…I don't even…uh. What?" Sam: "This. This 'kill first, question later.' What happened to us? Hunting things, we're good at that. Sure, we're great at that but that's only half of the bumper sticker, man?"
5. Sam: "And she told you she was The Darkness?" Dean: "No, she was wearing a name tag. What do you think?"
6. Jenna: "This job is supposed to be saving people." Dean: Yeah well it sounds better on paper, doesn't it?"





Blindspot - 1.03 - Eight Slim Grins
Grade: C
~Worst episode yet. I'm not a fan of when all the characters suddenly become stupid. I'm still iffy about the Taylor reveal too. Here's hoping it’s a hoax.

The Goldbergs - 3.02 - A Chorus Lie
Grade: B+
~I love both Beverly and Murray in this episode. Even Barry's dorky friend grew on me.

The Grinder - 1.02 - A Hero has Fallen
Grade: C
~Dean is still a complete schmuck, the logic is still way off base, Deb still rocked, and Lacoste is a great addition. In fact, Deb and Lacoste are the only hope I have that the 3rd episode will be better and thus make the show worthy of watching still.

Life in Pieces - 1.02 - Interruptus Date Breast Movin'
Grade: C+
~The first 2 segments were hilarious. The second two, not so much.

Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV. It's been a late night kind of week at my day job so I apologize for not getting to all the shows I wanted to this week. Thankfully we have our awesome guest reviewers, who keep picking up my slack. Thanks to them all! This week the nominated show was Nashville, which I enjoyed despite it not being my kind of show. I tend to favor more action-oriented and less character drama shows but I loved the commentary on our celebrity culture throughout the episode. Just as a reminder - once I review a nominated show in a season, I will not review it again. This allows me to cover far more shows in a year. Because of that I am glad to announce that Jessica will be the newest guest reviewer joining us and she'll be adding Nashville to the column on a regular basis. We also welcome Toni, a longtime commentator on this column and SpoilerTV in general, who will be reviewing NBC's Chicago franchise. Welcome, Jessica and Toni. I love that we are getting so much more variety in the series showcased here this season. Next week I will be reviewing The Americans, a show I watched throughout much of its first season but dropped due to time constraints. It's still on my to-watch list so I'm anxious to see how this episode stacks up to the ones I remember. If you would like to nominate a show (other than Nashville or a show I review regularly), just fill out the short form below. I'm anxious to try some of the shows I've been missing. Until next week then, happy TV reviewing.









Nashville - 1.01 - Pilot

To me, Nashville is Dallas with less big hair and much better music. It's also more real. Well in some parts. Now I don't know anything about the Nashville music scene but I'm guessing all the relationship drama and hardly subtle hints will be about as real as AutoTune. However the change in the music world is fascinating stuff and people are being shunted to the wayside in the big transition. Switch Rayna and Juliette's names to Reba and Taylor and you've got a pretty good summation of country/pop music today, hopefully minus the cat fights and general witchiness. And that's where Nashville gets very interesting. Both Connie Britton and Hayden Panettiere play their roles with abandon, even with the catfight in the beginning. While Rayna definitely comes off as the better character and person, Juliette is sufficiently layered so that she doesn't completely come off as the next 20-something celebrity train wreck no matter how hard she is trying to be one. There's a real character trapped under layers of superficiality and since Nashville is in its 4th season, I suspect they have fleshed her out better than the pilot does. They need to or else this will get one-sided way too fast. As for the plot, it moved fairly quickly in part because of the humongous cast, most of whom we barely caught a glimpse of. I'm not even sure I caught most of the regulars' names since they flittered on and off the screen so quickly. Hopefully they culled the cast somewhat to make it more manageable or else I don't see how the writers can juggle them all. Better to take an Empire approach and keep the focus somewhat narrowed but add in guest stars for an episode or two. For my tastes, they also need to tone down all the melodrama. I'm not a nighttime soap person so it felt like there were 16 emoangsty drama tropes in 42 minutes. I can do without the illegitimate kids, junkie bottom feeder moms, evil mustache twirling dads, and unrequited love geometry. It's the frank talk about ageism and flash over substance in our current celebrity culture that makes Nashville unique to me and for that it goes on my summer to-watch list. I'm interested in where this is going but if I'm being honest, I probably won't get far with it. Once the melodrama and love shenanigans (flash) take over the real-world discussion (substance), I'll drop this show as fast as anything starring a Kardashian. In that regard, I have a feeling that Nashville itself is going to become its own meta as enjoyable as most of the pilot was.

Grade: B
Ranking - 3+
Audience - those who like good music and great acting all wrapped up in one super soapy bubble

Best Reason to Watch - Connie Britton, who can sell any character and can sing to boot
Best Scene - Rayna tells off the record company (I know I wasn't the only one clapping.)
Best Character - Rayna right now but it could change rapidly
Best Song - Scarlett and Gunner's
Best Mean Girl Verbal Catfight - Rayna vs. Juliette
Best Plan - even with her reservations, Rayna still shows up for her husband's mayoral kickoff
Best Pep Talk…By the Devil - Wyatt convinces Teddy to run for Mayor. I've only seen 30 minutes of this show and I already know this guy is a snake. Be careful.
Biggest WTH - I think this cast rivals that of Lord of the Rings. How can they fit this many people in one 42 minute show? I can't keep most of them straight. They need to cull the cast or have people show up on alternating weeks.
Biggest Scandal - I'm guessing one of Raina's kids is actually with Deacon instead of Teddy
Biggest Brat with a Sympathetic Background - Juliette and her deadbeat mama
Most Likely to Hook Up - every single person on this show is bound to hook up, break up, and then hook up with someone new in an endless cycle
The "And It's All Downhill from Here" Award - AutoTune and package over substance, that's where music has gone
The "Welcome Back" Award - Connie Britton from Friday Night Lights / Robert Wisdom, formerly douche angel Uriel on Supernatural / Eric Close from Without a Trace / Hayden Panettiere from Heroes


Best Quotes -
1. Rayna: "So you're telling me after 21 years at this label, if I don't open for your little ingénue who wouldn't make it as one of my backup singers that you're not going to support me." Marshall: "Those are your words, not mine, but still I need to know your decision." Rayna: "Well you can kiss my decision as it's walking out the door."
2. Teddy: "Don't do that. You're beautiful and if you ever get a facelift I'm gonna leave you."
3. Manager: "Looks like we've got a little work to do on that 'Be Nice' deal."
4. Rayna: "She's got Randy doing her records. She wants you in her band. What? She coming for my house next?"
5. Wyatt: "Your first order of business as a mayoral candidate is to grow a pair."








Scorpion - 2.04 - Robots

Awww, that was a fun, uplifting hour of TV. Sure it was predictable and sometimes illogical but trust Scorpion to keep viewers' attention with its always present ticking down clock and a light, sweet moment to send them on their way. It's never going to win any awards but I always end up glad I've watched it. This week that's enough to skyrocket it to the top of the list. What made this episode particularly good was the amount of personal growth for both Happy and Walter. Both characters need more rounding, although I have been pleasantly surprised at how much more I've liked Walter throughout the season so far. Nice job of toning down his edges, writers. Allowing Happy to admit that she has feelings was a great touch since she's generally either snarky or reticent. I also really like Peri Gilpin's return to my TV. She was awesome in Frasier and I think she brings a softer touch to the show, which even Molina couldn't get. For the record, I liked Molina too and hope that occasionally she shows up again. Both are a huge improvement on Merrick. However the real kicker is the ending with all of them just enjoying each other's company. I adore them dancing together and being silly. For a team that was largely business in season 1, their more relaxed endings means that I can smile myself right out of the episode and feel like it was time worth spending. I love a feel-good ending.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - Walter and Happy's personal growth
Best Scene - Happy and Walter talk about not being robots
Best Aww Moment - Toby gives Happy a dollhouse
Best Ending - rooftop dancing
Best Back Story - Happy as a kid
Best Overused Trope on Scorpion - the high stakes countdown to sure death
Best Deductions - Toby, who guesses the highly classified mission by eye flutters / Sylvester, who gets the correct coordinates via a TV commercial
Best Product Placement - Go Pro camera
Best Return - Happy's dad, whom I wouldn't mind seeing more of
Biggest Ouch - dislocated shoulder to fit into the escape hatch
Biggest What the Heck - How is it at all conceivable that Walter doesn't know Morse code? Shouldn't he have mastered that in preschool?
Biggest Shocker - Walter has issues with the military guy in charge
Most Fun - Sylvester dancing
Most Old School - Sylvester's teacher sized compass
Most Heroic - Happy and Hall decide Walter's plan is a 3-person job so all 3 are willing to die for the crew
Worst Job - Paige having to babysit Ray
The "You're Not at All Expendable" Award - Cabe, they need you. I need you. You are the keeper of the common sense.
The "Yeah, I Don't Know about This" Award - Why open the hatch the whole way? That seems more likely to make the pressure so high that they can't close it again.
The "Say What?" Award - Ray is now crashing at Scorpion? When did that happen?
The "Oh Please" Award - I watched Bones. I know that scientists can make oxygen based on the scraps of stuff they have in their purses. Well, at least in Hollywood.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Peri Gilpin from Frasier / Travis Van Winkle who trades life on the Nathan James in The Last Ship for smaller quarters but a similar role here
Best Music - Dancing in the Moonlight by King Harvest

Best Quotes -
1. Happy: "In case we don't make it out of here, I just want to say I'm not really a robot." Walter: "Thank you for clarifying. I did know you weren't made of circuitry." Happy: "We both play a good game of denial. It might be the one thing where I can beat you but….right now my dad is up there trying to save me, the man I've been looking for over 25 years. I just never expected to want to live as badly as I do right now." Walter: "I saved 9 sailors' lives instead of us. I supported that act with calculations, but perhaps there was some sentimentality attached." Happy: "And you let that certifiable lunatic stay in our garage." Walter: "Maybe we're changing. Maybe…maybe I'm not a robot either." Hall: "You're not normal people, are you?"
2. Sylvester: "See I don't like the mojo of playing Battleship with an actual battleship."
3. Paige: "Toby, you've got to narrow it down." Toby: "We're working with a half-eaten hoagie and a piece of chalk. It's not like we're mind readers."
4. Walter: "They'll be needing me to code. I'll get my laptop." Happy: "And I will be building something so I'll get my tools." Sylvester: "And I will get my party hat because I don't have to go on a submarine." Cabe: "And I'll be going to keep anyone from wanting to kill them. Welcome to Scorpion."
5. Happy: "Sitting here is certain death. What we're talking about is just likely death." Hall: "I should volunteer then." Cabe: "I'll go. I'm the biggest and most immune to hypothermia." Walter: "You know if you leave there's a good chance that you die before any of us." Cabe: "I'm the most expendable. We can't risk Happy and you. You know the sub. Greater good." Walter: "Greater good."
6. Happy: "Toby calls us robots but tell me, what's more fascinating than a robot?" Walter: "Oh he endlessly analyzes feelings. Sylvester's a mess of feelings. Paige helps us sort them, but without the metal gears, the machine…it doesn't run." Cabe: "I guess my role is to kick the machine when it starts talking and doesn't focus."





Chicago Fire - 4.01 - Let it Burn
By Toni

Welcome back, Chicago Fire! At the end of season 3, Casey was working a human trafficking case with CPD, leaving us with an ominous cliffhanger. Gabby found out she was pregnant and doing something completely opposite of any other TV show I've seen, she went to Matt's apartment, I assumed to tell him. What she found was a ransacked apartment and a dead body. At the start of the season 4, Casey is in trouble with Nesbitt and the goons who want a little black book. In comes the small crossover with CPD. It's really ironic that Casey is beating Nesbitt only to have Voight pull him off and say, "Take it easy." It was just one of those moments that made me laugh. I know not everyone does but I love when these shows cross over. It's like one big, dysfunctional family and I enjoy that. This episode was good for me because we have a continuing story, two new characters, Severide's new story (albeit redundant), crossovers, and scenes at Molly's, which I love, while there wasn't a lot of time wasted on unnecessary story with Otis, Mouch, and Herman. The episode seemed to fly by but it paved the way for a whole lot of story this season. I think it's going to be a good one. There seems to be something for everyone.

-I'm not a fan of Dawson and there was a lot of her here. The fans will be happy. I'd like to see them use other characters more.
-Severide's story seems to be a rehash with nothing but a different reason to have him off of the truck. It's not original at all.
-Patterson is a douche.
-It looks like we have Severide's new love interest. I liked what I saw of her.
-Cruz continues to make me wonder "why is he here and Shay is not?"

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - The chief, who was everywhere/Casey and Dawson reunite and she tells him about the baby
Best Character - Chief Boden. He had little patience for BS in this episode.
Best Scene - Squad and Truck unblock the road in front of a burning building, by "any means necessary" and it was awesome.
Biggest Twist- Severide quits 51
2nd Twist - the very people who were blocking 51 from the fire at the crack house are now suing the city. Their reason? 51 had a slow response time because they are a poor neighborhood. Let's see how that goes. They could all be guilty of involuntary manslaughter for blocking emergency personnel.
Best Cameo - Chief Riddle, played by Supernatural alum, Fredric Lehne.
Best Reaction - Chief Boden is NOT impressed with the entry of our new candidate.
Worst Twist - Riddle stripped Severide of his rank
Most Welcome - Jimmy came to apologize for disrespecting the Chief and Firehouse 51 while his brother played it off as a hazing joke. Wrong answer older brother. The chief showed him the closed door and it was great. Jimmy showed a lot of character here. I think I'm going to like him.
Biggest Eye Roll - The intro of the new candidate, Jimmy, played by TVD's Steve McQueen. Not at all his fault, his brother just made him look foolish.
Least Surprising - Upper management has yet another problem with Firehouse 51. I'm getting tired of those guys.
Most Awkward - I was embarrassed for Jimmy. Boden fired him in two minutes and that has to be a record.
Most Ridiculous / Most Bizarre -The newly arrived couple from Portland.
Worse scene - Sylvie and Chili perform CPR. No way would I ever believe watching this scene that either of them passed EMT training. Never. I don't think I care what they have planned for these two this season.

Best Quotes:
1. Patterson: "I'd like you to remain with the company. Your reputation as a firefighter is not in question." Severide: "No, just my ability to lead."
2. Herman: "And the moron of the year award goes to..."
3. Boden: "Truck 81, Squad 3. Open up this street by any means necessary."
4. Herman: "You happy now? Is that what you wanted? He was a human being. You people make me sick."
5. Casey: "I don't ever want to let you out of my life again." Dawson: "I'm pregnant." (Thank you for not dragging it out)



Heroes: Reborn - 1.05 - The Lion's Den
By Laura Markus

It was kind of an uneventful episode. Certain scenes were amazing with really intense stuff going on. The standoff between Erica and Noah, later joined by Harris, Quentin, Taylor, and Miko jumping through an entire glass wall was epic (Ha, I made a pun). Erica is giving off some vibes similar to that of Angela Petrelli. Speaking of which, where is she? Where's Mohinder? Where's Matt? Where's Micah? At least we got to see Phoebe, although she might have killed Farah, which is not okay with me. Furthermore, the stellar acting done by Zachary Levi was not in vain. He broke my heart about 7 different times in this episode. And I think he used to be a dentist before he started hunting Evos with Joanne? That's kind of cool. I like how he called Joanne's brother. There were some low points of the episode too. Aside from her daring jump and getting her sword back, Miko's storyline is boring me a bit. I'm sure it'll pick up steam soon enough. As well, Carlos's story is kind of just sitting there. I did like how the police captured Captain Dearing, and Carlos, as El Vengador, gave him the option to stay put and get taken or to run away and stop chasing after Evos. Tommy finding out he was adopted was sad, and I just LOVE the Penny Guy. Here's hoping the show picks up really soon; content and ratings-wise!

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Two words: Zachary Levi. He's killing it in this role!
Best Scene - Luke burning the picture of Joanne and Dennis and watching his son's room go up in flames.
Biggest Tease - Noah talked about Hiro, Mohinder, and Molly all in one scene. Insane.
Worst Special Effects - Miko jumping through the glass wall. It just looked fake to me.
The "Are You Serious?" Award - Did they really kill Farah off? Another person of color got killed off?
Funniest Moment - Every week is going to be the same thing. Quentin's sass and ending every sentence in "Man" always make me laugh.
"Missing in Action" Award - Joanne. Hmmm, I wonder where she ran off to. I hope she gets back with Luke soon.



Nashville – 4.04 – The Slender Threads That Bind Us Here
BY Jessica

This was probably the most depressing episode of Nashville to date as it focused on Deacon and Scarlett dealing with Beverly’s death. I thought Charles Esten was outstanding in this episode. The way he portrayed Deacon’s grief and misery was very realistic, and it was heartbreaking when he destroyed his house. I hate that he blames Scarlett though. The Scarlett/Deacon relationship is one of my favorites on the show so I hope the rift between them doesn’t last too long. The postpartum depression storyline continued. Juliette is getting worse by the minute with Adderall, sleeping pills to counteract the Adderall, and finally an injection to make her numb. I’m so tired of this story. I think it’s very serious (and realistic as Hayden herself has postpartum depression), and I’m glad they’ve touched on it, but it’s time to get Juliette help and move on. Maybe they can salvage Avery and Juliette’s marriage and make me like her again. Elsewhere, Rayna brings Markus Keen to town. He’s supposed to be a huge name and he would be great for Highway 65, but I really can’t stand him. Nashville already has a huge jerk in Jeff Fordham, and we really don’t need another one. Can we focus on the plethora of men we already have on the show? Zoey made a return to Nashville this week. I’m not a huge fan of hers, but it was nice to see Scarlett talk with someone who is not her current or ex-boyfriend. I like that she finally realized Gunnar has always loved Scarlett. Maybe she can make Scarlett realize this and make her doctor boyfriend leave town?

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch- Deacon deals with Beverly’s death
Best Scene- Deacon destroys his house and punches the mirror as Maddie watches in horror
Best Actor- Charles Esten
Character That’s Growing on Me- Layla Grant. I enjoyed her scenes with Rayna and Will this week. If only she would dump Jeff.
Most Cringe-Worthy Scene- Jeff and Layla kissing. Gross.
Biggest Jerk- Markus Keen
Storyline I’m Tired Of- Juliette’s postpartum depression.
Character I Wish Would Leave Town- Jeff Fordham

Best Quotes -
1. Jeff: “Glad to see you’ve finally done right by my client.”
2. Rayna: “Shut up, Jeff.”
3. Will: “It’s all right to be happy with what you’ve got even it ain’t perfect.”
4. Avery: “I was wrong about Juliette. Whatever she used to be… whatever she used to feel… It’s gone. She’s gone.”
5. Deacon: “My whole life my sister was a fighter. You know that. She never gave up. Ever. Scarlett gave up.”



Once Upon a Time – 5.03 – Siege Perilous
By Missions

While I really loved the first two episodes of the season, I was not really a fan of this episode. It definitely had its amazing moments, as Once Upon a Time always has; however, at times in the episode I was quite bored. A lot did happen though. The best part of the episode was the fact that it was David-centric. I really like David and especially Josh Dallas, who finally got the screen time he deserves in this episode. In both settings he worked together with Arthur to get the toadstool (Camelot) and find the thief (Storybrooke). Both storylines were very interesting, especially the one in Camelot, where David had to fight in order to get the toadstool but in the end lost it in a little pond. But did he really lose it? No. At the end of the episode we see how David takes the Siege Perilous proudly while Mary is suddenly approached by Lancelot who warns her about Arthur. Shortly after we find out that Arthur stole the toadstool and therefore David did not lose it. Now we have to see which effect it has on the rest of the people in Storybrooke and how it might be an important development towards Emma becoming dark. In Storybrooke we find out that the toadstool has been brought there as well and even Regina figures out that it played an important role back in Camelot and will also play a very important role in Storybrooke. In addition to that, Rumple finally wakes up which we find out when the “rose” stabilizes and Belle rushes over the shop just to find out that he has disappeared. But where is he? Well, of course the Dark Swan took him while taking orders from the actual past Rumpelstiltskin. She tells Rumple how she will turn him into a hero while she will forever be the dark one. So as you see there was a lot going on, for my taste even a bit too much. Therefore my review is a bit all over the place. I prefer when they concentrate on only a few storylines and dig a bit deeper into them. Perhaps, that will happen in the upcoming episodes. I hope at least! Nonetheless, it was a good episode that left me wanting more.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch – Finally a David-centric episode! Last season he barely had any screen time and that really bothered me because I really like his character. Besides, it is nice to look at his pretty face!
Most Interesting Character - Arthur! The reveal that he was the one who stole the toadstool was very interesting and made his character way more inttiguing. I wonder what exactly he will do and if Lancelot and Mary will be able to stop him.
Best Character Development - Definitely David! Him taking the Siege Perilous was awesome. Unfortunately, it is all just part of a plan. Also Rumple finally has been given an interesting storyline.
Best Scene - David fights the knights leading to him “losing” the toadstool. / David takes the Siege Perilous while Mary is approached by Lancelot who warns her about Arthur. / Arthur revealing to Guinevere that he was the one who stole the toadstool. / The Dark Swan tells Rumple that she will turn him into a hero while she remains the Dark One.
“Welcome Back Award” – Lancelot! Nice to see him back. I am very curious to see what role he will play in everything.
Biggest Question – Where the hell is Lancelot in Storybrooke? / What will Arthur do? / What effect will it have on having Emma becoming dark?
Worst Scene – I am sorry Captain Swan lovers but I hated that scene! It was a nice reference to their first date in “The Apprentice” but I just am not a fan of those scenes. Besides, I just found it to be very weird. I did however include some quotes from that scene.
Most Boring Character – As much as I like Hook, I found him boring in this episode. I understand why he is acting like he is but I just cannot sympathize with him at this very moment. Also, Robin!! He has become completely boring and almost was of zero importance in this episode.
Character Most Worthy Of a Better Storyline – Zelena! I hated the fact that she was pregnant with Robin’s child and it has its repercussions. Rebecca has no material she can work with, which is a pity since she is such a good actress.

Best Quotes-
1. Zelena: “There you are my lovely voice. It’s so nice and friendly.” Regina: “Shut up!”
2. Arthur: “These people seem friendly, but they threaten everything we hold dear.”
3. Regina: “I can be a far greater nightmare than you could ever imagine.”
4. Emma: “All I need is your trust, I promise.”
5. Hook: “Do you love me? If you tell me you don’t love me, I will let you go.”



Agents of SHIELD - 3.03 - A Wanted (Inhu)man
BY Swanpride

This week I noticed that the show has come up with a construct which works surprisingly well. It has set up three storylines for the season (The Inhumans, Simmons and the Hunt for Ward), and each week puts one of them in the forefront as the most urgent one, while at least one of the others is allowed to breathe and delve fully into the emotions. This week The Inhumans were pulled to the forefront, but nearly equal time was spend on Simmons' slow recovery. I can't say how glad I am that the show actually addressed some of the possible consequences of being on another planet, even one which allows human survival. I am equally glad that even a traumatized Simmons is still Simmons. Though they naturally had to throw a curveball in the end. The main plot doesn't work quite as well. It does a lot to flesh out Lincoln's character - more by hinting details about his past, but also by showing a Lincoln who is a far cry from the peaceful doctor we have seen so far. In addition, it gives the audience quite a rundown of what exactly he can do with his abilities. There is no question that he would be a great asset, which makes Coulson's decision even more questionable. It is high time that someone calls him out on his readiness to sacrifice everything and, even worse, everyone for Daisy's sake. Plus, he is normally smarter than that. While trying to work with other agencies might be a good move, he should do it on his terms. On the Ward news front, pairing Hunter, who never shuts up, and May, who tends to be an epitome of silence was an inspired choice by the writers, but at this point their story felt a little bit like treading (or kicking) water in preparation for the big confrontation which might happen far, far down the line. This week they mostly provided some comic relief between all the drama.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Just pick a storyline, at least one of them should satisfy you
Best Scene - Daisy visiting Jemma. It was very sweet and a nice reminder of their friendship.
Best Character Interaction - Lincoln and Daisy. There wasn't really that much built up to the kiss, but the actors sold it in a way that it kind of makes sense.
Most Resilient - Ward's second in command. Wow, the guy really can take a beating. After last week I expected him to be at least in the hospital with a few broken bones.
Best Friend - Mack, who acts like a protective older brother towards Daisy
Most Underused - Bobbi. It is high time that she gets more to do than modeling a lab coat and being the sounding board for various characters.
Best Action - May taking out three wannabe rapists
Worst Twist - Coulson's actions this episode are very contrived, and it didn't help that the advertising kind of gave it away.
Best Wardrobe Choice - Daisy's black top. Want one.
Biggest head scratcher - No quarantine and no proper debriefing for Simmons? I call BS on that one.

Best Quotes -
1. Fitz: "You are self-diagnosing which is a sign that you are on the mend."
2. Jonathan (Lincoln's friend): "You are killing me with these details."
3. May: "How about I do you a favor and not tell anyone that a tiny little Asian woman kicked your a**?"





Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - 1.01 - Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

Ever watch something and at the end you still have no real grasp on what it's trying to be or how you feel about it? That's my general mood about Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. I'm a huge fan of musicals but none of these songs caught me. I like successful women characters but not ones that are so neurotic that they keep sabotaging themselves. I love wacky sidekicks but Patty came off just as bad if not worse than Rebecca in this pilot. Still I see the bones of potential and I like that the CW keeps experimenting with its programming. Greg so far is an awesome character, full of snark and yet not full of himself. Patty could easily come into her own and be a favorite. Yet the key to this show's success will lie in whether people embrace the batty Rebecca and find the humor in her flaws or if she'll get on their nerves. As for me, it's way too soon to tell but I do know this. This show should be a ½ hour comedy at best. It's not hour long dramedy material. I also know that there is no better fit content-wise for Jane the Virgin, so if Monday night fails it's not from lack of trying.

Grade: C
Ranking - 2+
Audience - those who love Jane the Virgin and don't mind musicals

Best Reason to Watch - there's nothing like it on TV
Best Scene - the end where the rapper is apologizing to all the women he objectified even if he still uses derogatory names for them
Best Character - Greg, who is snarky fun
Best Song - the reprise of West Covina
Least Appealing Character / Most Insecure - surprisingly it is Paula and not Rebecca, given her need to throw out random facts and stalk Rebecca
Best Moment - the Suits take off the school marching band for budget cuts
Best Dating Tip - stalking looks good on NO ONE
Best Aside - the rapper freaked out by how much it takes for Rebecca to get ready, who goes to apologize to all the girls he's dissed
Biggest Huh? - Rebecca's time speech to the partners
Biggest Product Placement - Sprint
Least Professional - Darryl breaks down and cries on Rebecca's first day
Least Worthy of Changing Your Entire Life For - Josh
Most in Need of Being Smacked - Rebecca when she curses her mother at camp
Most Delusional - Rebecca, who thinks it's love but it's really a nervous breakdown
Most Likely to Drive Someone Insane - Rebecca's mom
Worst Date - Rebecca, who makes out in every room of the house to find Josh
Worst Plan - It's not bad enough to move to follow a guy. It's really bad to move to follow a guy you haven't seen in 10 years and with whom you've exchanged about 15 words since. But it's really, really bad to be stupid about it. Why in the world did Rebecca move to the exact same town and get a job in it? Are there no other neighboring towns she can stalk him from? No one's going to find this charming or even sane.
The "Exactly How Old are You?" Award - Do adults actually wait by the phone for someone to call these days?

Best Quotes -
1. Rebecca: "I'm actually here because I'm meeting a friend but I don't…I don't see him." Greg: "Great. Maybe I know him. Is he eight-years-old or an alcoholic 'cause that's what we've got here?"
2. Darryl: "I hope you don't mind but I handed out copies of your résumé. I mean we are just so honored and well, confused frankly to have an attorney of your caliber here."
3. Rebecca: "I mean the motto is live, work, play." Greg: "We have a motto?" Rebecca: "Yes, on the website." Greg: "We have a website?" Rebecca: "It takes a few minutes to load but it's very informative." Greg: "This is where I live. Yea for me."
4. Greg: "Wait. So you left a job in New York to live near the beach. We're 4 hours from the beach. People say 2 but those people are dumb."
5. Rebecca: "I'm gonna go do this thing. Doesn't mean that I don't care. I'm just gonna go do the thing. I will come back later and let's circle back about the Jew thing 'cause that's a conversation that we need to have."



Truth be Told - 1.01 - Pilot

For all that people pan this pilot and hate on this show, it was just rather blah. It's boring but I wasn't offended as some people were. Sure making every single thing about race got tiring after the opening rift, but the real problem is that it's not funny. At all. The characters don't seem to have the potential to be funny either since they are largely stereotypes. Yet it's still early so anything can change and I'd be far more willing to give this the benefit of the doubt after the pilot than say The Muppets or Dr. Ken, both of which were way worse. This felt like it wasn't trying hard enough while the other two felt like they were trying too hard to be edgy and relevant and missed on both counts. As for Truth be Told, it's basically TV oatmeal. It's not going to get you excited, but if there's absolutely nothing else in the house it's palpable. Shame because the two leads are capable of a whole lot more.


Grade: C
Ranking - 2
Audience - Saved by the Bell fans who love Mark-Paul Gosselaar and those suffering from white guilt who feel they must support it

Best Reason to Watch - the diversity of the cast
Best Character - Angie
Best Character Interaction - Mitch and Russell
Best Neighbors - What kind of friends without children agree to come to your daughter's tea party complete with tiaras? That's some friendship dedication.
Best Comeback - the valet's John Mayer comment
Least Funny - making a big deal out of a kid using the word vagina
Most Embarrassing - car Dubsmash
Most Snore-worthy - most of the jokes which are stale
The "Welcome Back" Award - Mark-Paul Gosselaar, most well known for Saved by the Bell but also Franklin & Bash and NYPD Blue / Tone Bell, who was the only good thing about Bad Judge

Best Quotes -
1. Mitch: "You've got to say something." Russell: "I'm not wasting my breath, Mitch. It's a valet stand, not Selma." Mitch: "Then I'm saying something." Russell: "No, no." Mitch: "I'm your best man. That did not end at your wedding. I'm your best man everywhere we go." Russell: "I should have made my brother my best man."
2. Russell: "Wait. So who's wife are we hiding from?" Mitch: "All of them. All of the wives."
3. Angie: "Well if you see something, say something but if you just think it's something, shut the hell up. My girl T needs this night out."
4. Tracy: "So what's happening here is you're making a problem where one doesn't exist." Russell: "Oh that's his jam."
5. Mitch: "You haven't been blessed with a sweet, angelic 4 year old. We want to die."





Blindspot - 1.04 - Bone May Rot

Now that's more like it. Last week's episode had me rolling my eyes. This week's episode had me on the edge of my seat. After all, nothing's more terrifying than the idea that something you can't even see is about to wipe out millions of people. Plus there's an interesting debate to be had about how much medicine is too much medicine for the planet. Not that releasing deadly diseases is ever a good solution. For the record, neither is killing your spouse before you kill yourself. Just saying. What is a good plan is to keep Jane's identity a mystery. I love that there is some doubt now because it allows the mystery to continue. Plus it keeps the interaction between Weller and Jane from getting too creepy. Other highlights from this episode include the fight scene, Reade explaining his beef with Jane, and the introduction of Patterson's code-breaking boyfriend. Not that I expect him to last much farther. He's likely to be dead, evil, or hired in the next few episodes. The only lingering issue that troubles me is Tom. He's way to black and white about Jane, which makes him annoying. Plus inter-agency conspiracies are getting a bit old. Let's focus on that in season 2 and keep chipping away at the tattoos for now.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the case of the week was interesting
Best Scene - Dr. Suri's villain monologue, which is a strange pick for me since I usually hate those
Best Entrance - Jane flying in to save the day like always
MVP - duct tape, saving the world
Best Twist - Jane may or may not be Taylor and I am voting for NOT
Best Reference - MacGyver
Best Redirect - Mayfair stops Patterson from bugging her about the case file by questioning how she cracked the new code
Biggest Huh? - Why would someone have a 10-year-old play babysitter overnight to a 5-year-old? Wouldn't it make more sense to have the 5-year-old stay at the neighbor's house where they have actual adults?
Biggest WTH - Okay if you want to shoot yourself instead of explaining yourself, fine. Why shoot your innocent husband too?
Biggest Dummies - Why are you all standing around watching the deadly disease bag explode? You can see it just fine from the control room. If it didn't contain, you all would be bleeding out right now.
Least Surprising - the vials are missing
Least Interesting Subplot - Zapata's gambling addiction, unless it's an undercover assignment
Most Mustache Twirling Villain - Tom, the pro-assassination CIA bureaucrat
Most Likely to Die Soon - David, Patterson's boyfriend, because he already knows too much
Most Contrived Way to Make Sure the Two Leads Have Quality Time - make it so one has to share intimate details about his childhood with the other in order to spark memories
Worst Liar - Patterson, who trips and stumbles over her explanation
The "92nd Verse, Same as the First" Award - I think Reade makes good points about Jane but let's can them. It's not like Weller will pay attention so just give it up. We don't need the same conversation every week.
The "Well That Explains It" Award - Weller was on babysitting detail when Taylor went missing so no wonder he feels guilty
The "Welcome Back" Award - Joe Dinicol from Life with Derek / Paul Fitzgerald from Younger

Best Quotes -
1. Suri: "All these diseases that we're trying so desperately to find a cure for are actually the last ditch effort of a dying planet trying to wipe out the thing that is actually destroying it - us."
2. Weller: "Is she Taylor Shaw or not?" Patterson: "Both tests are conclusive but both can't be true. I don't know who she is."
3. Reade: "Oh come on. Your usual type's a mix between gladiator and Viking." Zapata: "I do not have a type." Reade: "I catch bad guys for a living, alright. The last 2 dudes you dated scared me." Zapata: "Then you scare easily because they were a loan officer and soccer coach."
4. Reade: "We should be in there with them." Zapata: "I'm glad we're not. You really want to be stuck in a room with Weller right now? No window, no way out. That'd be the control freak's worst nightmare."
5. Tom: "This doesn't have to be a straight favor. What do you need from me? Let's make a deal here." Mayfair: "I need for you to get out of my office."



The Flash - 2.02 - Flash of Two Worlds

Sorry Jay, I don't like you. You come off as a condescending douche most of the time and we already have a better Barry. We don't need you or your plot device shortcuts. Go back to your own earth. I'm also not a fan of everyone being down on Barry for being cautious and not trusting another new guy saying he wants to help. It's smart and I would think that all of them had learned from their Wells experience. Caitlin in particular comes across as out-of-character. First off, I refuse to believe that she gets dumber because of a crush. If Jay makes her an overly trusting scold, then he needs to go right now. Second off, she just lost her husband 6 months ago. It's way, way too early to start having her flirt and fawn. Back the truck up right this second. I don't need you to launch another ship and make this random guy appear more important than he really is. Not cool. Add to it that I hate Cisco being a meta, alternate universes and time travel are shortcuts for shoddy writing, and the bad guy of the week bored me, and this was not The Flash's finest moment. It feels an awful lot like they are trying to fix something that was never broken in the first place. Still they are trying to improve Iris, so there is that. Plus Patty is intriguing in her overzealousness and enthusiasm.

Grade: C

Best Reason to Watch - at least they are acting like a team this week
Best Scene - Stein calls out Cisco on his new nifty powers
Best Character Interaction - Barry and Patty, who at least had some fun
Best Father/Son Moment - Barry reassures Joe that they will find Patty
Biggest Twist - Iris' mom comes back. Not sure if this is a good or bad thing yet. Laurel's mom was awesome on Arrow.
Biggest Fan Girl - Patty fawning over Barry's forensic reports
Biggest WTH - Caitlin seems to be fawning over Jay when she just lost her husband
Biggest Laugh - dialogue like, Jay: "He's an unstoppable demon with a face of death."
Biggest Thanks - Joe for asking the questions about what the heck is happening so I don't have to
Biggest Huh? - Why does it seem like Barry is jealous of Jay?
Biggest Shout Out - Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Cheesiest Costume - Jay's helmet, which looks like the one the girl wore in Adventures in Babysitting
Smartest Plan - locking up Jay until they have more info
Worst Plan - shooting the sand guy
Worst Reason to be a Villain - Wanting to kill off all your competition to be the best. Who is this Zoom? The Evil Queen from Snow White?
Most Irksome - Flash calling the other guy Flash
Most Condescending - Jay who keeps calling Barry "kid"
Most Suspicious - Patty Spivot because she is way too good to be true
Most Randomly Annoying - News about Oliver from Arrow shows up on the news in this show. Just stop.
The "Nope, Just Nope" Award - nothing can happen to Stein because he's the only one who can kind of explain this science mumbo jumbo to me
The "Hey, At Least Someone Remembers Ronnie" Award - Stein sadly reminds everyone that he isn't one half of a Ronnie duo while they seem to be glossing over it
The "Things That Don't Make Sense" Award - Why doesn't Jay have his superpowers if all the others from his earth do?
The "One is Quite Enough, Thank You" Award - I really do NOT need another Flash. Barry is enough. I like Barry.

Best Quotes -
1. Joe: "I'm gonna be honest here. I don't understand what the hell any of you are talking about." Cisco: "So Jay is saying he's from like a mirror world or a parallel universe that's very, very similar to ours." Stein: "Multiverse would be a more apt description." Joe: "Nope, not helping." Cisco: "Bless your heart."
2. Joe: "Are you aware of what happened to my previous partner?" Patty: "Detective Thawne, yes. I know that he died and the one before him, Fred Shire, died too. But the one before that's not dead, just transferred. I'm sure it had nothing to do with you."
3. Cisco: "Did you just say War of the Americas?" Barry: "I wish you would have just told us you lost your helmet. It would have saved us all a headache."
4. Patty: "Hey, he's kind of like your dad, right? So do you have any advice on how I can crack his No code?" Barry: "Yeah, I've been trying to pick that lock since I was 11 so if you figure it out, how about you let me know."
5. Patty: "You know you got lucky, right? You think you were chosen, the rest of us don't mean anything, but it's not true. You were just at the right place at the right time. Getting those powers didn't change who you are. They only highlighted the worst parts of who you already were."
6. Jay: "This world is in danger." Cisco: "What other worlds are there?"



How To Get Away with Murder - 2.04 - Skanks Get Shanked

H2GAwM is nowhere near as exciting so far this season as it was last season. Partly it is because it's reaching for the lowest common denominator to pump ratings. Everything's about sex and incest these days. In that, this episode was miles better than the last one. Still I find the characters are not as engaging even though I liked this case and it had several good moments. For one, I cannot stand Connor. He's always playing the victim and whining while shifting blame. He gets zero passes because if he truly wanted to be sympathetic, he'd turn himself in. Right now he just comes off as a brat like he did mid-season 1. Be part of the solution or shut up! I did like Michaela in here with the exception that it feels like she's in a been there-done that plot. She's basically Wes 2.0 and it's going to backfire just as much. To be honest, the twists are starting to feel a little been there-done that too. They need a much bigger twist to be happening because if it just Annalise bleeding out, it's not much different than the whole Sam story last year. Mostly I want to feel like I'm watching something new instead of the same old, same old and I want at least some of the characters to be intriguing again. Right now I am most interested in what's up with Asher, a sentence I never thought I would utter.

Grade: B-
Current Theory - Annalise is arranging this whole being shot thing herself. My guess is that she took the poison she procured from Frank in order to slow down the bleeding so that she could be saved in time. It's a big hoax that has something to do with the prosecutor and the students and Nate are all in on it with Annalise. Those pills are definitely coming into play sooner rather than later.

Best Reason to Watch - everyone's betraying everyone tonight
Best Scene - Annalise knocks Connor down a few pegs like he deserves
Best Character Interaction - Annalise and Nate's wife
Best Twist - score for virginity / Caleb is part of whatever is happening with Annalise
Best Plotline - Ashton gets a plea deal to spy on Annalise
Biggest Creeper - Rebecca's foster brother
Biggest Say What? - Bonnie tells Asher that she killed Sam for….reasons?
Biggest Tease - we still don't know anything about Asher's past or who this girl is
Most Awkward - Nate's dying wife calls Annalise to her bedside to help her to die
Most Repetitive - all the freaking recapitations of scenes we just saw
Most Likely to Screw Up - Annalise is so focused on what Nate's wife said that she can't concentrate in court
Most Stupid / Least Sympathetic (Definite Psycho) - Zoe flips out in court and threatens to kill someone in front of the jury
Least Sympathetic (Possible Psycho) - Caleb, who if innocent has a right to be angry but doesn't have a right to keep reminding people that he's their boss and thus proving he's a douche
The "Pot and Kettle" Award - Connor is a smug jerk for someone who is also involved in covering up a murder. He gets no points from me and needs to be Gibbs' smacked out of his whiny, blame everyone else tendencies. Ugh, what a pretentious, irksome character. I don't care if he is a fan favorite because he's hot.

Best Quotes -
1. Lauren: "Just because they're smiling doesn't mean they don't want to kill each other."
2. Annalise: "Make me out to be the villain if that helps you sleep at night, but don't you ever screw with my cases."
3. Laurel: "Go for it. Look at all the fun we got out of Wes dating Rebecca."
4. Connor: "You don't know that." Nate: "Maybe not but I do know that worrying about things that are out of our control is the only way we get in trouble right now." Laurel: "Really, I think killing someone is another way we can get in trouble."
5. Laurel: "I stole Zoe's phone." Frank: "What?" Laurel: "I think she's a sociopath." Frank: "You stole our client's phone. You're the sociopath."



Limitless - 1.04 - Page 44

I liked this episode because it not only followed up on Brian's character growth from last week a little, but it also had a faster moving plot. At first I wasn't sure if they were going to be able to juggle 3 disparate plot lines but they handled it with aplomb and I ended up liking all three. The treason plot became a good tie into the main story of breaking into Naz's office to steal the NZT files. I loved the dichotomy of the spy talking about how it was his little choices that got him into that mess while also showing Brian start down the slippery slope of being a mole himself. It left an ominous feeling over where Brian himself is headed and how far Sands expects him to go. In this, it reminded me of Burn Notice and that's always a good thing. I really liked though how Brian struggled over the decision because of his loyalty to Harris. That shows the continued character growth I was hoping for. The C plot of Maciel and the dead guy had its good twists as well. I liked seeing Harris support Brian's side case even though it didn't make her look all that good. The biggest thing that bugged me in this one was the importance they gave to Harris' father being tracked by the FBI. How is this new? As soon as NZT was mentioned, it was a given that the 2 plots would tie in. It feels like much ado about nothing, although it could get awesome if it is also tied into Morra. All in all, Limitless is the most improved show from the pilot for me.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - by having three escapades at the same time, the pacing was brisk
Best Scene - Maciel thanks Brian for getting him out of jail
Best Plan - Harris goes to see her father's paintings
Best Dilemma - Should Brian break into Naz's office or not? It shows a lot of character growth in a short amount of time because old Brian would have done it in a second.
Best Remedy for a Broken Heart - learning how to explain quantum physics and double the lifespan of mice
Biggest Huh - How is it possible that Brian can't remember Ike's real name if he's on NZT? I thought the whole point of it is that he could remember everything.
Least Surprising - the FBI knew about Harris' father taking NZT and had him under surveillance
Most Surprising - this is as big of a deal as the music makes it seem
Most Cold - Sands, who threatens to kill Brian's dad if he doesn't get what he wants
Most Interesting Storytelling Device - 2 Brians
Worst FBI Agent - Harris for telling Brian to blow off the treason case
The "Ecstasy and Agony" Award - Brian gets top-level clearance…to go through someone's month-old garbage

Best Quotes -
1. Brian2: "Have you gone maybe a little nuts? Naz is leaving her office right now as we speak. The clock is running. You do not have enough room on your to-do list to help Arthur Maciel." Brian1: "There's still 2 days left and besides, Rebecca just…you know, confided in me. I can't steal files from her boss' office right now." Brian2: "So it will be easier to betray her later then?"
2. Harris: "And Brian, when I said I had your back I didn't mean breaking and entering. Next time, don't set off the alarm."
3. Boyle: "Please don't spill coffee on the top-secret file."
4. Naz: "You will have access to knowledge that if applied improperly would leave you vulnerable to charges of treason. You know I need to know that you understand this and take it seriously and that t-shirt isn't helping." Brian: "Uh, well I'll tell you this much. I don't want to go to jail. So, I'm good."
5. Harris: "Brian, you're on NZT. Are you seriously telling me you can't get out of an office building?"



Quantico - 1.03 - Cover

Quantico is winning in the flashback / flash forward competition for me, even over heavy competitor How to Get Away with Murder. While in the latter show it is used for cliffhanger shock value, Quantico is using it effectively to layer multiple aspects of the terrorism case. That is still the weakest link though as the training helps us get to know the characters better. Sadly this week's training was not near as engrossing as last, mostly because the test itself made zero sense to me. There are better ways to grow teamwork than breaking everybody apart. I did like the focus on Simon though because he's become quite the complex character. How Mark Pellegrino fits in as his boss is baffling though. It almost feels like they were grooming Alex to play this role, but not because they wanted to frame her. Instead it feels like they were grooming her to find the truth, although why they would let it go this far I have no idea. Either way, I'm staying tuned because I love the pacing of these last couple of episodes and I'm genuinely interested in how the whole thing plays out. Plus each character is more fascinating than the next.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - everything is perfectly twisty
Best Scene - Shelby and Alex reconcile
Best Pay Back - Raina punches Nimah to give her a black eye too
Best Twist - Simon is in league with the Deputy Director
Best Character - Simon
Biggest Douche - tie - Shaw / Natalie
Creepiest Kid - Shaw's son saying he was getting paroled sounded like a threat instead of sharing good news
Most Likely to Get a Job on a Crime Procedural Show - Simon
Most Intriguing - Simon got kicked out of the training but he's still an agent
Most Dramatic Announcement - Alex was being framed since she started at Quantico…and it's hot in St. Louis in the summer
Stupidest Plan - getting others to say their version of the truth about someone and then posting it to create conflict doesn't make sense in a job where you have to rely on teamwork, even with Shaw's endgame
Best Plan - Simon makes it look like duress while helping Alex
The "Welcome Back" Award - Mark Pellegrino from Supernatural, The Returned, Being Human, Revolution, and much more / Anna Khaja from Stitchers

Best Quotes -
Best Quotes -
1. Caleb: "Profile me all you want. I'm an open book." Shelby: "Yeah, I've heard of it. American Psycho."
2. Raina: "I'm not mad at them, Nimah. The things they were saying…they were talking about you. Your aggression, your bad performance that I have to match. You are average. That's why I'm mad. I didn't even want to be here in the first place and now that I'm here, I'm not allowed to do my best. I'm stuck doing your best."
3. Alex: "Are you going to vote?" Shelby: "I may not like what anyone said about me but I like myself and if I voted, I wouldn't."
4. Caleb: "Tell me what you see, Alex." Alex: "I see a narcissistic sociopath that's in over his head." Caleb: "Huh, I see a butterfly."
5. Shelby: "You reach a river in the forest. Do you cross it or go around?" Amin: "I would have checked a map first."



Rosewood - 1.04 - Vandals and Vitamins

For the majority of this episode, I had made up my mind to drop Rosewood for good. I hated that Villa was still a prick to everyone. It got on my nerves in episode 2 and it wasn't getting one iota better. I can't handle douchey characters when they complain about things that are going to happen anyway. One more time listening to her carp about Rosewood getting involved when I knew he'd be there anyway and all the socks in the world would have been depleted. That's why the end of the episode was so important. They're finally acting a bit like partners which makes her a little more palpable. Rosewood has his own character flaws in that he has to always be the smartest guy in the room. It gets annoying after awhile too. That's why I loved Dr. Foster so much. He was equally smart…until they inexplicably made him a complete moron. Foul on that play. Still the best reason to watch this series is Mama Rosewood, who has a big heart and a big butinsky tendency, which makes it easy to see both sides. It is on the fact that she's joining the team that I have not dropped this show completely, although realistically it may get buried under the avalanche of other shows that also get booted to marathon status.

Grade: C+
Verdict: marathon later

Best Reason to Watch / Best Character Interaction - Rosewood vs. Foster
Best Scene - Rosewood and his mama make up and hug
Best Career Move - Villa gives all the credit to her boss
Biggest Mistake - Making Foster a killer instead of making him a grouchy sidekick. That's one great character.
Biggest Ouch - Rosewood tells his mama to back off and she leaves his spare key
Biggest Oops - Villa is snarking about the rich and powerful guy and he's right behind her
Biggest Moron - Dr. Foster admits to killing two of his patients in the non-comic version of the villain monologue. Ugh! Just ugh!
Biggest What the Heck - They go out searching for Rosie's exes but never bother to see if they even have kids when they are narrowing it down. That's some shoddy research.
Biggest Awww Moment - Villa reassures Rosie about his girlfriend / Rosie reassures his mama about her place in his life and offers her a job with him
Most Snarky - Dr. Foster
Most Persistent - Mama Rosewood, whom no one should get on her bad side
Most Jekyll and Hyde - Kat, who offers to help Rosewood track down his possible teenage son but then suddenly feels the need to push her credentials in his ex-girlfriend's face to feel more secure
Least Shocking - Rosewood does NOT have a son
Worst Plan by a Smart Guy - trying to kill someone who the whole world knows is accusing you of murder
Worst Plan Ever - telling someone they are father to a teenager in a letter (even if it ended up being untrue)
The "Say What?" Award - How exactly would it be Rosewood's fault if he didn't help a child he didn't know he had? Someone needs to take responsibility in that equation and it would be the mother that never told the father about the kid. Back off, Mama Rosewood.
The "It was Old 2 Episodes Ago" Award - The #1 problem Rosewood has is NOT that it is utterly indistinguishable from a score of other shows but that Villa is still highly antagonistic against Rosewood. We all know they will end up working together so why do we have to listen to her grouse about it Every. Single. Time. It's beyond frustrating now and my stockpile of socks dwindles far too quickly.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Adrian Pasdar from SHIELD, Burn Notice, Heroes, and Judging Amy

Best Quotes -
1. Rosewood: "Dr. Foster, thanks for making the time to see me." Foster: "I didn't. I was hoping you'd leave." Rosewood: "Oh okay." Foster: "This seems to be the only way to make sure that happens."
Rosewood: "Well when you want to see the best, what's 90 minutes you know?" Foster: "Not long enough to get you to leave."
2. Rosewood: "I want you to come work for me, part-time as much as you want to. I don't even know what your role's gonna be but what I do know is how the police are annoyed with me. They are frightened to death of you so that's gotta be useful." Donna: "Are you sure about this? We will not always get along, you know." Rosewood: "But we are always going to be family, the only family that I'll ever have, so I would love having you closer."
3. Pippy: "Yo bro, she has no job, nothing to do. Let her sink her teeth into this so she doesn't sink them into us. I'm just saying."
4. Rosewood: "The tour's over?" Foster: "Not until you see the exit."
5. Villa: "It was just something my husband used to do. He…we would sit down to watch a movie. He's got his candy. Never eat the greens, weird superstition of his. It annoyed me when he was alive. I miss it like crazy now that he's gone."





How To Get Away with Murder - 2.03 - It's Called the Octopus
Grade: D
~This truly sucks as an episode. I don't care one jot about any of these characters' sex lives. The only interesting parts are the hints of back story on Asher and Frank and the fact that Nate is on Wes' plan to find the truth.

Rosewood - 1.02 - Fireflies and Fidelity
Grade: C
~Way, way too much bickering and Villa is a huge douche this episode. I did like the therapist twist at the end.

Rosewood - 1.03 - Have-Nots and Hematomas
Grade: C+
~Villa is still a douche to about everyone and Rosewood suddenly becomes brain dead in a car going over 100 mph. Still the scenes with his mother raise the grade as does the case and Villa may be heading in the right direction.

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.



Arrow -
1. Diggle: "It was my first chance for answers. My last chance." Oliver: "I'm sorry." Diggle: "Don't be, Oliver. This isn't your fault. It's mine. I should have trusted you. Told you about this forever ago" (Ben L)
2. Damien: "Miss Fayed hired you for one job. One. Against my objections and only because my associates are anxious to progress to phase three." Fayed: "We shouldn't talk about Genesis." Damien: "Don't lecture me about secrecy. Particularly on the same night that you were just compromised. On the same night that I lost good men in the name of protecting you." Fayed: "Damien..." Damien: "MR. DARKH!" (Bradley Adams)
3. Malcolm: "I really enjoy sparring with you, Nyssa." Nyssa: "I'm not sparring." Malcolm: "I know. That's what makes it so much fun." Nyssa: "You know I would show you no mercy given the opportunity." Malcolm: "That's why I take great care not to give you the opportunity." (Bradley Adams)



TBE -
1. Wilkin: "My name is Wilkin Brattle. I was a knight in Longshanks army. Ventris was my commander; he sent me and my legion to an ambush of certain death. I was spared by a miracle and fled to your land, only to be roused again in blood." (Robert Fruin)
2. Wilkin: "I'm sorry I lied to you Lady Love. My time with you...it was worth the punishment I'm about to receive." (Robert Fruin)
3. Father Ruskin: "With every new piece of truth, I grow more bewildered, good woman." (Robert Fruin)
4. Lady Love: "I know the burden of your soul. I recognize it as my own. I don't know if what I feel for you is God's will or the work of a clever demon. But, I am certain, Wilkin Brattle, that whatever the case may be, it is the thing for which I've been waiting. It is the other girl I hear in my heart. The other life that lives in the shadow of my own." (Robert Fruin)



TBBT -
1. Amy: "Well I was hoping the next person I dated would be a little less like Sheldon." Bernadette: "You mean not a scientist?" Penny: "I think she means not a weirdo."
2. Sheldon: "Excuse me, Barry." Barry: "Yes." Sheldon: "When can I stab one of my friends?" Barry: "In fencing we don't call it a stab. We call it a touch." Sheldon: "Uh yes, I'm aware but if I say I want to touch one of my friends, I'll get called into Human Resources."
3. Howard: "My name is Darth Vader. I am your father. Prepare to die."



Blindspot -
1. Weller: "You've been through so much. If I'm making this harder for you, then just tell me 'cause that's the last thing that I want. All these expectations…I should never have put you in that situation." Jane: "Kurt..." Weller: "I should never have let them take you. I'm sorry." Jane: "It wasn't your fault." Weller: "I've heard that my whole life." Jane: "But you haven't heard it from me. It wasn't your fault."
2. Jane: "I thought we were all on the same team." Carter: "Oh, now that is adorable."
3. Mayfair: "Smugglers have been moving cesium out of Abkhazia, selling it to terrorists on the black market." Reade: "Apparently in leaky containers."



Brooklyn 99 -
1. Charles: "You're looking a little fat." Terry: "How dare you. You can't comment on my body, this is a workplace! Now I'm feeling objectified by your male gaze!" Charles: "Please, just listen, sir." Terry: "I will not listen! You are trying to shame me and that will not fly!" (Nirat Anop)
2. Jake: "Looks like we both have a pretty bad case of "jerk boss."" Holt: "Yes, yours is an idiot, and mine is a forked-tongue lizard witch." (Nirat Anop)
3. The Vulture: "Why don't we make like Boyle's mom and debrief me." (Nirat Anop)



The Blacklist -
1. Red: "Yes, hello. I need an ambulance. A man's dying on a cross." (Jimmy Ryan)
2. Red: "What is your fantasy?" Liz: "It's been the same thing for as long as I can remember. I'm walking in a park with my husband. In between us is our little girl. I'm holding her hand in mine, and I never let go." (Daniel van der Veer)
3. Aram: "I'm so happy to see you." Liz: "Not many people are these days." Aram: "Okay, I probably shouldn't say this, but you look fantastic." (Daniel van der Veer)



Chicago Fire -
1. Herman - "Lady, you can take that high and mighty attitude back to Portland. This is Chicago." (Toni)
2. Nesbitt - "I'm a protected federal informant." Voight - "No kidding? Now get your ass up against that truck." (Toni)
3. Voight - "You know how you drown a rat, Jack? You just toss his dumbass out in the deep end and wait for him to sink." (Toni)
4. Herman - "For the love of God, will somebody get over here and arrest this moron?" (Toni)
5. Brett - "Doesn't she know what clear means?" (Toni)



Crazy Ex-Girlfriend -
1. Rebecca: "What's up with your resting Maggie Smith face?"
2. Valencia: "Do all people who go to Harvard say it as much as you do?" Rebecca: "Yeah."
3. Rebecca: "Hey I didn't move here for him, remember? I moved here because I needed a change and Josh just happens to be here. Get it straight." Paula: "Oh are we still doing that?"



Criminal Minds -
1. Reid voice over: “All sins tend to be addictive and the terminal point of addiction is damnation. W.H. Auden.” (Emma)
2. Hotch: “Six years ago, a restaurant in Las Vegas, New Mexico was robbed.” Ben: “There’s another Vegas? Hey, they got gamblin’ and hookers out there too?” (Emma)
3. Lewis: “And what that means, is that after you finish serving out your remaining 20 years here, you’ll be transferred to New Mexico. Now the good news is they’ve outlawed the death penalty but the bad news is it’s gonna be a slow death in a cage.” (Emma)



CSI: Cyber -
1. Elijah: "When two men have a problem, they talk about it. More often than not, that problem goes away."
2. Avery: "You're not racist. You're a coward. This isn't about science. This is about vengeance because you hate your brother."
3. Krumitz: "Don't plug your charger in until you know where it's been."
4. Nelson: "Oh don't worry, Krummy. You'll figure it out. Big-boned friend once said that if necessity is the mother of invention, then perseverance is definitely is the father."



Empire -
1. Cookie: "Oh, mention the devil name and he will walk right in." Jamal: "God help us all." (Nirat Anop)
2. Andre: "I'm not a good person ma." Cookie: "Stop saying stuff like that, stupid." Andre: "I've done horrible things." Cookie: "So have I, Dre. But we are good people. You wouldn't be here trying to make it right if you weren't. God knows your heart." (Nirat Anop)
3. Cookie: "So is he coming'?" Jamal: "Nah." Cookie: "It's probably for the best. That devil walk in here, this whole place might catch fire." (Nirat Anop)



Fargo -
1. Mike: "“Isn’t that a minor miracle, in the state of the world today, in the level of conflict and misunderstanding, that two men could stand on a lonely road in winter and talk, calmly and rationally. While all around them, people were losing their minds." (Nirat Anop)
2. Floyd: "Your time will come. It will. But this isn't it. And if you stand by me now, I promise you that as soon as this crisis is over, I'll hand you your legacy and I'll turn my thoughts to the grave." (Nirat Anop)
3. Floyd: "Your grandfather left the ashes of the Weimar republic and came to this country to build a name for himself. He built an empire from a shoeshine box. And then, and only then, did he send for your father." Dodd: "Ma, I know the story." Floyd: "No, you don't. Because if you did, you'd know that you are just a small part of it. That's what an empire is: it's bigger than any son. Or daughter." (Nirat Anop)
4. Molly: "What's that?" Lou: "Oh, Mama's doing Daddy's job again." Molly: "Go Mama!" (Nirat Anop)



The Flash -
1. Jay: "Ahhh. It's good to know whatever Earth you go to there's a Big Belly Burger." (Nirat Anop)
2. Caitlin: "Being a superhero isn't always about how fast you can run, it's about helping however you can, wherever you're needed most. I think Jay Garrick, physicist, has just as much to contribute as Jay Garrick, superhero. Maybe more." (Nirat Anop and Dahne)
3. Captain Cold: "You know what they say, live fast, die young." (Nirat Anop)
4. Patty: "I thought I stepped on an ear. I didn't. If I did I'd be hearing things." Joe: "Oh hell, no." (Prpleight and Dahne)
5. Joe: "I know. I should have told you sooner but I couldn't figure out the right way. And the mother you thought you remembered, the perfect mother, the stories I made up for you, that is the mother you deserve and I knew Francine couldn't be like that. She would only break your heart. I'm so sorry." Iris: "Dad, it's okay. I understand. You were just trying to keep me safe." (Dahne)
6. Cisco: "How do you feel?" Lisa: "Like we should have put down some plastic." ~This quote made me laugh since Cisco is basically trying something that could potentially blow Lisa's head off. Humor in the face of death is a win for me. (Dahne)
7. Lewis: "Okay son, make me proud." Cold: "Like I care." ~This one was all in the delivery. (Dahne)



The Goldbergs -
1. Announcer: "In life, there are certain relationships that define who you are - your first teen crush, your best friend, your family. These are the relationships that matter the most but they're also the hardest because when you truly love someone, you sometimes hold on too tight, afraid that you'll lose them. But the truth is when you give the people you love most just a little space, you'll find the place they really want to be is right at your side."
2. Bill: "Your son walks his own path. I see what Lainey sees in him." Murray: "I don't."
3. Beverly: "Bill, you don't have a woman in your life telling you all the things you do that are wrong and stupid. I will be that woman." Bill: "Actually, I really haven't missed that very much."



Grandfathered -
1. Kid: "Are you the bathroom lady?" Annelise: "I used to be so much more."
2. Jimmy: "Gerald, I've hosted Mariah Carey's 40th birthday party for the last 5 years. I think I can throw a party for a 2 year old who's not even famous."
3. Jimmy: "Annelise, I need you to throw me a party." Annelise: "Now? I'm visiting my grandmother's grave." Jimmy: "Is she going somewhere?"
4. Frederick: "Wow, that's a lot of complicated stuff for a kid's party."



Grey's Anatomy -
1. Meredith: "Isn't that right, Penny?" (about where she used to work) Penny: "That's.....(struggles to talk) That's right." Meredith: "Perfect Penny killed my husband." (Ben L)
2. Meredith: "I did nothing to you. I lost my husband and the father of my children, and you're falling apart? I don't get to do that, because I have three kids. So please shut up, and get out of my room!" (Nirat Anop)
3. Bailey: "Dr. Robbins, you're drunk. I don't think I've ever seen that. I like drunk Robbins." (Nirat Anop)



Hawaii 5-0 -
1. Steve: "Okay, well the father lied about the protection money. What else did he lie about?" Danny: "You keep asking me questions I don't know the answer to. Then you get upset when I don't -" Steve: "No, it's rhetorical! This is how we figure things out!" Danny: "Well, if it's rhetorical, then I don't really need to speak." Steve: "You know what? Enough." (Laura Markus)
2. Kono: "Feeling the burn, Danny?" Danny: "No, I'm tasting the burn. Remind me to never eat breakfast tacos before a five mile run." (Laura Markus)
3. Chin: "HBD paid him [the suspect] a visit at the hardware store where he works, but he didn't show up this morning." Danny: "Well, that's 'cause you get the day off after you kill somebody." (Laura Markus)
4. McGarret: "Iceman, like from Top Gun?" Biker: "What’s Top Gun?" McGarret: "Did he say what’s Top Gun? I should arrest him just for that." Chin: "Where do we find Iceman?" Biker: "Couldn’t tell you. I don’t even know his real name." Chin: "That’s convenient." Biker: "This ain’t the Shriner’s Club, okay. We don’t have business cards." McGarret: "You know what the Shriner Club is but you’ve never seen Top Gun?" (Prpleight)
5. Danny: "I hate the way you drive. I hate the way you look when you drive. I hate everything about your driving." (Prpleight)
6. Chin: "808 Road Warriors are a collective of stunt riders. They use social media to organize flash mob style events where they shut down traffic and perform their tricks. They have no respect drivers, pedestrians, or clearly the law." Lou: "Yeah I get it cause riding that motorcycle like a normal person isn’t dangerous enough." (Prpleight)



Heroes Reborn -
1. Luke (leaving a message on Joanne's phone): "Hi, honey. This is your loving husband. You know, the one you nearly shot in the face." (Laura Markus)
2. Quentin: "So, are you like a cosplayer? Or, do you do LARPing? [...] She's definitely not a LARPer." (Laura Markus)
3. Malina: "Well, if you're not gonna eat, you can at least tell me why you tried to kill yourself." Luke: "I used to believe in something. I had a purpose, a reason for living. But then I lost it. I was just looking for a sign." Malina: "I'm looking for something too. Someone, actually. 7 billion people in the world - and I'm supposed to find one of them. Crazy, huh?" (Laura Markus)



Homeland -
1. Quinn (to the kid): "Shut the f** up." (Bradley Adams)



How to Get Away with Murder -
1. Annalise: "I caught Wes and Nate together last night." Frank: "Screwing?" (Daniel van der Veer)
2.Annalise: "You want to know the truth? Asher was going to testify against everyone in this house, so Bonnie told him that she killed Sam in order to save your a**! Because that's what we do around here. Ruin everyone's lives to save yours. Nate's, mine and now Bonnie's. Who's next, huh? Whose life do you want to destroy to stay free?" Michaela: "Why didn't you just tell us?" Annalise: "Because I'm trying to protect you like always. When are you gonna finally accept that?" (Daniel van der Veer and Dahne)
3. Laurel: "You know who hasn't seemed worried this whole time? Who keeps sneaking off?" Michaela: "He's the only one she really trusts. He knew what was going on all along." Connor: "Screw the puppy. He's a snake." (Daniel van der Veer)
4. Frank: "Where are you going?" Annalise: "To kick some a**." (Laura Markus and Dahne)
5. Connor: "I might be going to jail." Oliver: "Very funny." Connor: "I'm not kidding. [...] Just know that, meeting you, and everything that we have...it's everything. I mean, you mean everything. I love you, Ollie." (Laura Markus)
6. Annalise: "You don't think I don't notice what's happening here? Day drinking? Acting out against me? I miss that man I first gave that trophy to." (Laura Markus)
7. Oliver: "Hey, do you think Annalise would ever pay me? I mean I do all this work for her for free." Connor: "You don't want to work for Annalise." Michaela: "Trust your boyfriend on that one."
8. Asher: "Did you…you cut a deal for yourself, didn't you?" Dad: "Of course I did." Asher: "God, is there any part of you that thought that maybe I should just do this to protect my kid and not to protect myself?" Dad: "I'm protecting the both of us." Asher: "But mostly you, dad."



iZombie -
1. Liv: "Oh, take your finger out of your mouth, sweetie, that's full of herpes." (Nirat Anop and Dahne)
2. Liv: "The color is called 'sorry Beyonce' and I might be in love with it." (Nirat Anop)
3. Liv: "I wear this dress like someone's paying me too." Ravi (twirling in his lab coat): "Oh, as I do with this." (Nirat Anop and Dahne)
4. Liv: "I can't believe my BFF Bethany was a skanky Harmony." (Nirat Anop)
5. Liv: Arranging a murder is well within his skillset. You know it, I know it." Ravi: "I know it." Liv: "It's known." (Nirat Anop)
6. Liv: "Oh I'll just wait here…for you to pull up the car." Clive: "What am I? Driving Miss Crazy?"
7. Liv: "I am literally going through hell. Do you even care?" Ravi: "Okay, you've literally forgotten the meaning of the word literally."
8. Vaughn: "There's a reason why I'm not getting hitched, detective." Liv: "Because you can't legally marry your own reflection?" Vaughn: "Burn."



Life in Pieces -
1. Heather: "Where's his starter girlfriend? You know, the freckly faced nerd that he's supposed to hold hands with and make mixed tapes for." Jen: "I don't know. He went straight for the 'I Sold an App' girlfriend."
2. Greg: "It's happening, isn't it?" Jen: "Yeah." Greg: "We're the crazy parents." Jen: "Yeah, but our baby's gonna live forever." Greg: "She'll be like the Highlander."
3. Greg: "Wow! She is….not as pretty as you are. Nope, not by a mile." Jen: "You really stuck the landing there."



Limitless -
1. Brian: "So what do a cat, a spaceship and Jack Black have to do with terrorism?" Rebecca: "That’s Paul Revere." (Prpleight)
2. Sands: "Why is there a clay effigy of me on your coffee table?" (Prpleight and Dahne)
3. Regular Brian: "Just because you remember everything doesn't mean you know everything. We are not omniscient or today would have gone very differently and if putting myself first means being okay with what happened to Chris Garber, then I'm not playing. I mean you tell me I've got to be ruthless to survive but if that means killing the part of myself that makes being alive worthwhile, that is not how I'm getting through this. That is not how we’re getting through this so deal with it. You don't have a choice really because by the time I take my next pill, the damage is already going to be done."
4. Brian: "I can be really annoying when I'm not on NZT." Ike: "We've noticed."
5. Brian: "The worst part of this job is learning about things you never knew you needed to worry about. For instance, weapons of mass disruption. Sounds like a really bad band name."



Nashville -
1. Gunnar: “You all suck as wing men.” Will: “Well it’s pretty hard when you’re choking right out of the gate.” (Jessica VanWinkle)
2. Luke: “Don’t go around trying to play cool mom with someone else’s kid just because you’ve abandoned your own.” (Jessica VanWinkle)
3. Rayna: “If I didn’t work with people who had complicated lives there wouldn’t be anyone to make music with.” (Jessica VanWinkle)
4. Avery: “How the hell am I supposed to work with crazy?” (Jessica VanWinkle)



NCIS -
1. Abby: "Gibbs, this is Janice. She's my new friend. She helped saved the lives of the hostages. And you can arrest her now, cause she's working with the bad guys." (Daniel van der Veer)
2. Brown: "You have a fire starter kit in your heel?" Abby: "You don't?" (Daniel van der Veer)
3. McGee: "That's actually really interesting what he was doing." Tony: "Not really, McNerd. What is interesting is that the fact that his CO says he's been divorced three times, has no friends or family that still talks to him." Gibbs: "Yeah." (Daniel van der Veer)
4. Abby: "Gibbs is the answer. Gibbs is always the answer."
5. Abby: "If you take a life today, then you failed yesterday."



Once Upon a Time -
1. Regina: “These two can outlive a cockroach.” (Missions)
2. David: “You tried to trick me with a catchy title and a comfy chair.” (Missions)
3. Rumpelstiltskin: “Be careful. Love is a weapon, Deary. The most dangerous weapon of all which means the pain you should worry about isn’t the kind inflicted by a broken sword but the kind that comes from a broken heart.” (Missions)
4. Guinevere: “Stop trying to mend that sword or your marriage and your kingdom will be broken forever.” (Missions)



The Player -
1. Alex: "I forgot how much getting shot can hurt." Mr. Johnson: "It's been 6 days. A Band-Aid® and an aspirin should work." (Prpleight)
2. Alex: (after Cassandra notes that hacking into the Pentagon was impressive) "I was gonna say stupid but sure we can go with "impressive". (Prpleight)
3. Alex: "The bet’s over. I lost. I’m gonna take the rest of the day off; maybe go to the spa." (Prpleight)
4. Cassandra: "Looks like low tech went brilliantly." (Prpleight)
5. Solomon: "If you give me a gun it’ll double our chances of getting to the consulate alive." Alex: "Absolutely not." Solomon: "Why?" Alex: "Because firing a weapon at another human being is a choice you should never have to make." (Prpleight)



Quantico -
1. Shaw: "Don't let your guilt re-write history."
2. Caleb: "When did Harry Potter become James Bond."
3. Natalie: "This ain't shooting skeet at the country club. This is the real deal and I've got the battle scars to prove I'm up for it." Shelby: "No scars on me. I guess that means I'm more qualified."
4. Caleb: "Wow, you're like a boss at this thing." Shelby: "Wait. My life is in your hands?" Caleb: "I'm down, Blake Lively. I'll make sure you don't chip your French tips." Shelby: "You are lucky you're an analyst because you have friendly fire written all over you."



Scandal -
1. Andrew: "Weirdos! Focus!" (Jimmy Ryan)
2. Olivia: "So, I wish we'd never met. But we did. And I tried. I tried and failed. And tried and failed again to hide. To stop loving him. But I couldn't. I was weak. I hated myself. I wore this ring to remind me of my weakness. And when our affair was exposed, I had to follow my own advice and stand in my truth." (Nirat Anop)
3. Leo: "We're going to take what the public views as a cheap and tawdry affair between the President and his former communications director and we're going to spin it into the greatest love story ever told. Olivia and Fitz, a love like no other." (Nirat Anop)



Scorpion -
1. (After everyone steps out in Super Fun Guy costumes) Sylvester: "I can’t believe I’m not there with you." Hostage: "I can’t believe I got caught by you people." (Prpleight and Dahne)
2. Sylvester: "My name is Sylvester Dodd I’m work with Agent Cabe Gallo badge number 28355. I’m requesting an immediate extraction from a humanitarian mission in Kazakstan where they are there protecting civilians from illegal nuclear weapons." Receptionist: "We’re the National Association of Theatre Owners. You want the NATO on Pico." (Prpleight)
3. Happy: "You're not part of Scorpion." Ray: "But I live here." Happy: "So does a possum in the rafters."
4. Walter: "What is our goal?" Cabe: "We need to get to the nuke." Walter: "Right. Okay and what's our obstacle?" Toby: "Guaranteed death from Eastern Bloc mobsters."
5. Ray: "Now get on." Sylvester: "What? On Happy's organ donation machine?" Ray: "You want to stop feeling powerless. You want to be a hero like your pals are being right now. Then this is your moment, Big Fella. Seize it like a superhero would."



SHIELD -
1. Simmons: "I know you're looking for signs of PTSD, but I assure you I'm fine." Garner: "You've been through something pretty extreme. There will be after-effects, and that's okay. It's okay to struggle." (Nirat Anop)
2. Simmons: "I have to go back, Fitz." (Nirat Anop)
3. Fitz: "B is for Blue is for Biological Sample." (Nirat Anop)
4. Bobbi: "There's someone in particular whose very worried about you." (Nirat Anop)
5. Hunter: "Always in a bloody boot." (Swanpride)
2. Fitz: "Sorry. It's tuff when people keep things from you." (Swanpride)



Stitchers -
1. Cameron: "No one's out here." Kirsten: "He was. I just saw him." Cameron: "Okay how about we put the knife away, Jason?"
2. Linus: "Did you guys know that the term 'selfie' was invented by an Australian?" Camille: "And did you know that the term 'Who Cares?' was invented to describe this conversation?"
3. Camille (talking about candy corn): "What do you have against corn?" Cameron: "Uh corn of the cob, nothing. Corn tortillas, bring it. Popcorn, corn chowder, corn muffins - I'm all over that, but pretend corn trying to be corn…pass." Camille: "Read the first ingredient." Cameron: "Corn syrup." Camille: "Thank you."



Supernatural -
1. Claudette: "You can't do this. I have rights." Dean: "And I have a fake badge."
2. Minion: "She looks at me like she wants to eat me." Crowley: "She wants to eat everyone. Don't take it personally."
3. Dean: "Listen, before you finish what you're about to say, know that we are the only thing between you and Crowley's ninjas." Claudette: "But I didn't try to hurt him. I am a nobody. I'm worse than nobody. I'm nobody's third cousin who doesn't even get invited to dinner."
4. Dean: "Why isn't he answering the phone?" Sam: "Because he's a d** and that's not breaking news."



The Walking Dead -
1. Carol (speaking to Sam): "Your dad used to hit you and then he got himself killed. It happened. Now, it's done. You live with it or it eats you up." (Ben L)
2. Carol: "It happened and now it's done. You live with it or it eats you up." (Nirat Anop)
3. Morgan: "You keep choosing this life, you will die." (Nirat Anop)

Sorry this is a day late. Real life and allergies have been ganging up on me, but I have started to slowly get caught up. How's your TV schedule going? I hope your shows are treating you well. This week was a mixed bag for me with some shows correcting weak points and some creating them. I will say that the nominated episode of The Americans was a high point for the acting alone. Keri Russell has certainly grown since her Felicity days. Next time's nominated show is NCIS if I can find the episode that was nominated. CBS is getting stingy with their streaming and I'm not paying to watch commercials. If you'd like to nominate a show, please fill out the short 2 question form below. Reminder - I will not review any nominated show I've already reviewed this season so no need to nominate The Americans or Nashville. Also if it is listed under weekly reviews, I will already watch those. If you have any questions about the nominating process or how shows are randomly chosen, hit me up in the comment sections. As always thanks to our guest reviewers and until next week, happy TV viewing.









The Americans - 3.09 - Do Mail Robots Dream of Electric Sheep?

To be honest, I have absolutely no clue what was going on in this episode at all. Something to do with mail and double crosses and children's services. It's all a muddled mess. Still it doesn't matter because some scenes don't need context to be great. Like watching Viola Davis break down Annalise one piece of makeup removal at a time on How to Get Away with Murder, the scene with Betty and Elizabeth is one of the finest pieces of craftwork I have seen. It's understated and very real. What is happening is so thoroughly despicable and yet Elizabeth never comes off as a cartoon monster or even a crazy zealot. Then in her last moments, Betty confronts Elizabeth as evil and she has no comeback. It's a powerful moment that probably would have been even more intense if I had any clue why it was happening, but there's no denying the brilliance of this scene. And it's not the only one. The scene between Gabe and Philip is deceptively laid back until you realize that the game is not actually on the Scrabble board but a fight for control over the Jennings' family itself. If you never have any intention of watching The Americans at least try the Betty and Elizabeth scene. If you do intend to try it, I highly suggest starting from the beginning. It really is a show you need watch in sequence.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - the acting
Best Scene - Betty and Elizabeth talking about making the world a better place
Best Moment - when Betty the hostage realizes that Elizabeth is going to kill her
Best Plan - Betty tries to get Elizabeth to feel empathy for her by telling her all about her family
Best Retro - all the cool classic cars
Best Reference - the title
Best Twist - Stan planned the threat to the witness
Biggest Awww Moment - Elizabeth lies to Betty to reassure her as she dies
Biggest Difference between Seasons 1 and 3 - In season 1 it seemed like Philip was the one trying to pursue Elizabeth. In this season, it seems like Elizabeth is more conciliatory.
Biggest Huh? - I obviously don't remember this show as much as I thought I did. Is Philip/Clark married to this woman too? I mean they are talking about having kids.
Most Intense Non-Death Moment - Gabe vs. Philip
Worst Advice - taking aspirin with beer or a raw egg
Worst Spy in the World? - Who is this Hans guy and why is he so terrible at his job? If I were Elizabeth, I wouldn't want to work with this liability either.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Richard Thomas of The Waltons' fame

Best Quotes -
1. Betty: "Do you have children?" Elizabeth: "Yes." Betty: "And this is what you do?" Elizabeth: "Sometimes." Betty: "By yourself?" Elizabeth: "With my husband." Betty: "Why?" Elizabeth: "To make the world a better place." Betty: "You think doing this to me will make the world a better place." Elizabeth: "I'm sorry, but it will." Betty: "That's what evil people tell themselves when they do evil things."
2. Betty: "You are not going to let me leave, are you?" Elizabeth: "It's not possible. No." Betty: "Oh, this is not how I expected it to end, the story. I'm not afraid of leaving the world. I don't know why, but I'm not. It's better than falling down in the street like a drunk and waiting for some stranger to pass by or sitting in front of the television alone. Oh, I hate hospitals. When Gil was sick, I hated to go see him there. I went but I hated everything about it."
3. Gabriel: "Elizabeth rejected the first officer proposed to be her husband in America. In her own way, she chose you." Philip: "It never felt like that to me." Gabriel: "Never the less, it's true."
4. Elizabeth: "It's only natural that you developed feelings for Martha. I understand." Philip: "Thanks for your permission." Elizabeth: "I didn't mean it like that."
5. Gabriel: "Stuck between a geode and a hard place."





The Flash - 2.03 - Family of Rogues

I admit it. I groaned when I heard this one was going to revolve around the Snarts. Neither of those two come off well usually because Cold has that annoyingly cheesy vocal rasp and terrible, terrible dialogue, while Lisa is schlock-ingly sexual in the most one-dimensional vampy way. Generally all I do is laugh when they are on the screen and not in a complimentarily way . However this episode built the two up as people with an actual back story and some empathy. It's a good twist for the spin-off because I need to not actively despise main characters going in. Not that I need more of the Snarts around. They're best in small doses. Not only were the Snarts a surprise, but The Flash did something no other sci-fi genre show would dare to do. It cut the emoangsting off at the knees. Woo hoo! I adore that Iris saw her dad's point-of-view right away and forgave him for lying to her all those years. It could have been a multi-episode chasm between them but instead they took the high road and didn't let it devolve into contrived drama just to give Iris something to do. Big time kudos to the writers for reminding me why this is my favorite comic-based show. It helped make this the best episode of the season so far and the episode of the week.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - Cold didn't come off as a cheesy, flat ubercomic villain this time
Best / Most Heartbreaking Scene - Joe tells Iris that her mother is still alive and Iris understands why he lied
Best Character Interaction - Cold and Barry
Best Continuity - Big Belly Burger
Best Thinking - Barry keeps Lewis from killing anyone through being smart
Best Cat Woman - Lisa Snart plays the sexy villainess in Cisco's life
Best Twist - Wells is back in this universe and perhaps won't be limited to the last 30 seconds of every episode now
Biggest Leap of Faith Literally - Iris leaps out of an office building window because Barry says he'll be there to catch her
Biggest Improvement - Cisco, making the suit cold retardant
Least in Need of Coffee - Patty
Worst Plan - telling everyone that your wife died
Worst Father Ever - Lewis inserted a bomb in his daughter's head to force his son to cooperate with his plan
Best Daughter - I'm not a fan of Iris usually, but I have never liked her more than in that scene with Joe
Most Handy - being able to catch bullets when you're pretending to be a bad guy
Most Needing to Go - Caitlin's crush on Jay
Most Overused - It used to be "my bad." It's always anytime someone uses the word "feels" as a noun. Newbie to the category is "my jam."
Most Ruthless - Lewis shoots Barry
The "Say It Isn't So" Award - Jay is staying. Please no, let him go.
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Linda is back. Woo hoo! I love the actress and the character. Now to give her something to do.
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Michael Ironside as the default military guy in the 80's and 90's, including Top Gun

Best Quotes -
1. Joe: "I know. I should have told you sooner but I couldn't figure out the right way. And the mother you thought you remembered, the perfect mother, the stories I made up for you, that is the mother you deserve and I knew Francine couldn't be like that. She would only break your heart. I'm so sorry." Iris: "Dad, it's okay. I understand. You were just trying to keep me safe."
2. Cisco: "How do you feel?" Lisa: "Like we should have put down some plastic." ~This quote made me laugh since Cisco is basically trying something that could potentially blow Lisa's head off. Humor in the face of death is a win for me.
3. Lewis: "Okay son, make me proud." Cold: "Like I care." ~This one was all in the delivery.
4. Caitlin: "Does it physically pain your family NOT to rob people?"
5. Joe: "I need you to leave town." Francine: "And you thought you could pay me to walk away from my own daughter." Joe: "Last time you walked away for free."
6. Caitlin: "Being a superhero isn't always about how fast you can run. It's about helping however you can, wherever you're needed most. I think that Jay Garrick, Physicist has just as much to contribute as Jay Garrick, Superhero. Maybe more."
7. Joe: "I don't know. Now I feel like my 1 wrong might be worse." Barry: "Look Joe, I've known you for….you know, most of my life and I know that you always have a good reason for the decisions you make and obviously you were worried that Iris would go down the wrong path if Francine raised her. I mean look at Snart. He's a criminal because he had Louis for a father. That could have been me." Joe: "Oh come on, never." Barry: "Yeah because I had you…and so did Iris. You just gotta trust in that and tell her the truth." Joe: "Yeah, how do I do that without hurting her?" Barry: "She's not a little girl anymore. You should have seen her in action the other day, putting her neck on the line for a story. She can handle anything that comes her way." Joe: "I've just lied to her for so long I'm scared she's not gonna understand or forgive me. I could lose her." Barry: "No, she's gonna forgive you. You've just got to give her a chance."





Chicago Fire - 4.2 - A Taste of Panama City
BY Toni

I'm getting really tired of 51 getting disrespected by the public, other firehouses and upper management. That needs to end. The Firehouse is always under attack from the very people that are supposed to support them. Always. That upper management has an Odin complex and half of them need to go. Boden is no fool and I relish the day he and Riddle go head to head. Gabby and Casey completely underwhelmed me but I can see how their fans will be very happy. Congrats to you guys. It was funny that they were going to tell no one about the baby and 3/4 of the way through, everybody knew. All the way to the CPD. Odd that we didn't get to see Antonio mention it instead of Voight. I love when CPD characters come on the CF. I don't love the vigilante gene that seems to live inside of Casey. In the real world, he wouldn't have his job and he might even be dead for pulling some of the stunts he's pulled. Going to the club and getting that book was stupid. No other word. Stupid. He didn't know Voight was following him. He didn't know Nesbitt was following him. Given the trouble he gets himself into, he should be a little more aware of his surroundings. Thankfully PD saved his butt.

It makes me mad that there are people in this world who act just like those idiots who are suing 51. So disrespectful to the people who put their lives on the line to protect them. I wanted Casey to punch somebody. So ridiculous. This entire plot is ridiculous. The response time is documented. What's to complain about? The police were there when they were ramming the cars out of the way. The initial call, the arrival time, the police arrival time, it's all on record. The city should be suing these jerks for obstruction and charging the ones who barricaded the street with involuntary manslaughter. This is a stupid plot. So many holes, so much belief to suspend. I just can't. I knew the Portland's were going to be entitled jerks. I wanted Herman to pull that biddy out of her doorway by her hair. What a bint. This is another stupid plot full of holes. THEY VOLUNTARILY MOVED INTO AN APT DIRECTLY ACROSS THE STREET FROM A BAR. Then they're surprised at the noise. You can't see me but I am rolling my eyes so hard. Move. Find another apartment. No one forced you to choose that building. Idiots. No, instead they file a complaint with the city. What yuppies. Patterson is a psycho. I don't care; it's coming. The man is unhinged and I need him to back away from Severide. That's the one story I'm looking forward too. He and Kelly will have a come to Jesus moment and it will be glorious. I really need our guys to catch a break next week and start giving as good as they're getting because Team Fire is getting it from all sides.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - It appears Nesbitt is gone. Thank you.
Best Scene - A very pissed off Herman announces karaoke night at Molly's after being treated like a second class, stupid citizen by Mrs. Portland. He blasts that music and sings his little heart out. Out of the back door, directly across the street. I laughed so hard. We won't forget about you Herman.
Worst Scene - Casey gets into a car chase with Nesbitt on the streets of Chicago, at night and pulls his truck into an alley. Dumb move. He's lucky Voight was following him. Nesbitt got out with a gun AND got the notebook. So weak.
Best Reaction - Gabby blurts out she's pregnant to a stunned Boden. He's as happy as if it was his grandchild. So cute.
Biggest WTF - The man 51 saved in that fire acts like he doesn't know a thing about anything that could help them with the lawsuit and won't come forward with any statement. What a jerk. They could have left you there you greedy old man.
Most Disturbing - The look in Patterson's eyes when he was trying to intimidate Kelly at Molly's. Psycho.
Best Addition - Jimmy. They're easing him in slowly and not making everything about him all at once. There is a story there with his brother coming.
The MVP - Molly's. Everybody but the Portland's loves her and now she has karaoke.
Biggest SMH - The idiot woman grabbed her fiancé while they were using a defibrillator. They call clear for a reason, lady.

Best Quotes -
1. Herman - "Lady, you can take that high and mighty attitude back to Portland. This is Chicago."
2. Nesbitt - "I'm a protected federal informant." Voight - "No kidding? Now get your a** up against that truck."
3. Voight - "You know how you drown a rat, Jack? You just toss his dumba** out in the deep end and wait for him to sink."
4. Herman - "For the love of God, will somebody get over here and arrest this moron?"
5. Brett - "Doesn't she know what clear means?"



Criminal Minds – 11.04 – Outlaw
BY Emma

This is my favorite episode so far this season. We had fast pacing, an interesting COTW, and great character moments but my favorite part was the last three minutes. The closing montage, starting with the take down of the outlaws and lasting through the funeral for the victims from the opening sequence, accompanied by a heartbreaking rendition of “Amazing Grace” by Alaska Reid, had this self-professed Grinch almost in tears. Everyone had a chance to shine tonight including the guest cast. Rossi’s discreet but pointed chat with the Chief about the drinking and the Chief’s subsequent involvement in the take down reminds us that Rossi is not only a great profiler but a seasoned agent and knows how to broach the subject without coming across as critical or condescending but supportive and understanding. I’ve missed Reid’s history lessons. In early seasons much of the factual exposition came from Reid due to his perfect recall but the writers have spread the exposition duties around more in recent years – not something I really noticed, or realized how much I missed until his story of Las Vegas, New Mexico’s claim to fame. Garcia and Morgan are always good for a laugh and they did not disappoint. Garcia and caffeine is comical enough but her interactions with Morgan while super-caffeinated garnered a good old-fashioned belly laugh from me. I gotta give the writers a huge shout out for giving us a male/female relationship that is deeply rooted in love without feeling the need to make it a romantic relationship over the years.

Grade: A

Best Reason to Watch – fast pace, interesting COTW with great character moments
Best Scene – the final montage
Best Character Interaction – Rossi and Chief Montoya / Super-Caffeinated Garcia and Morgan
Best Twist – one of the Unsubs was involved in a case the BAU consulted on years before
Best Reference – outlaw Lester wants to go down in a “Blaze of Glory”
Best Song – “Amazing Grace” by Alaska Reid
Best Ending – montage of the take down and the team at the victim’s funeral instead of the usual plane scene and voice over quote
The “Welcome Back” Award – Benito Martinez of TV, movies and video game voice work / Emily Rios of The Bridge and Breaking Bad / Jesse Luken of Star-Crossed and Justified

Best Quotes:
1. Reid voice over: “All sins tend to be addictive and the terminal point of addiction is damnation. W.H. Auden.”
2. Hotch: “Six years ago, a restaurant in Las Vegas, New Mexico was robbed.” Ben: “There’s another Vegas? Hey, they got gamblin’ and hookers out there too?”
3. Lewis: “And what that means, is that after you finish serving out your remaining 20 years here, you’ll be transferred to New Mexico. Now the good news is they’ve outlawed the death penalty but the bad news is it’s gonna be a slow death in a cage.”



Heroes: Reborn - 1.06 - Game Over
BY Laura Markus

A truly phenomenal episode in all meanings of the word. By far the best of the series, Game Over really was able to mesh all of the characters' storylines in truly intense and satisfying ways. Granted, there are storylines that are still less interesting to me than others, but the way this episode was crafted and edited made up for it. The return of Hiro felt like a breath of fresh air. He was so happy to see Noah, and vice versa. The fact that they actually had to keep him locked up in a video game world because he was so powerful is such a cool thing. Malina and Luke will make an unlikely friendship - but one that I will enjoying seeing very much. I'm still in shock by his suicide attempt, and her race to save him. Tommy's story seems a bit convoluted at this point, but he and Emily were adorable this week. Someone came up with a theory that she could be an Evo or just be working with Caspar? That's cool with me. Carlos's story is still not doing much for me, but I like this relationship he has with Captain Dearing. Miko finally played a major role in an episode where we found out she was just a game character this whole time. That was cool. Also, Ren, buddy, I'm pretty sure you're not actually in love with her. And lastly, we have Quentin and Phoebe, as well as that Renautas mess with Erica and the Harris clones. QUENTIN! He brought such a lighthearted tone to this show where it desperately needed it. I hope Noah and Hiro save him by going back in time. He needs to stay on this show! Overall, a brilliant episode, and I can only guess and hope that the next two episodes are even better!

Grade: A+

Best Reason to Watch - Hiro's triumphant return!
Best Scene - Luke's suicide attempt and Malina saving him afterwards.
Worst Special Effects - Oh god, the CGI mess of Malina saving Luke. I mean, they tried, and that's all you can hope for, right? (It was still a mess. MAJOR props to Zachary Levi, though, for acting his way through that.)
Saddest Scene - Noah holding Quentin as he's dying, and calling him "buddy", only 10 minutes after telling him not to call him buddy.
Best Monologue - Luke, after being saved by Malina, tells her about his life's choices.
Creepiest Special Effects - Phoebe's shawdowmancer hands.
Funniest Moment - Quentin asking Miko if she's a LARPer.
The "Really?" Award - Ren telling Miko he loves her.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Masi Oka as Hiro Nakamura, finally!!!

Best Quotes -
1. Luke (leaving a message on Joanne's phone): "Hi, honey. This is your loving husband. You know, the one you nearly shot in the face."
2. Quentin: "So, are you like a cosplayer? Or, do you do LARPing? [...] She's definitely not a LARPer."
3. Malina: "Well, if you're not gonna eat, you can at least tell me why you tried to kill yourself." Luke: "I used to believe in something. I had a purpose, a reason for living. But then I lost it. I was just looking for a sign." Malina: "I'm looking for something too. Someone, actually. 7 billion people in the world - and I'm supposed to find one of them. Crazy, huh?"
4. Quentin: "I won't let you down, buddy." Noah: "Don't...call me buddy."
5. Noah: "Quentin!" Quentin: "Did I do it? Did I save her?" Noah: "You did good, buddy. You did good."
6. Noah: "Good to see you old friend."



Nashville – 4.05 – Stop the World (And Let Me Off)
BY Jessica VanWinkle

This is episode was all about realizations. Deacon realized that Scarlett did the right thing by taking Beverly off life support, and Avery came to a decision about his marriage: he wants a divorce. Clare Bowen was amazing this episode. The way Scarlett remembered her mother and lashed out at Deacon broke my heart. Charles Esten also delivered another good performance as Deacon apologized to Scarlett for not being at the hospital. I loved that he told her he thinks she made the right decision. Hopefully the rift between these two is over. Juliette also realized that she needed Avery and tried to make amends. She fired her staff and her obnoxious “friend”, but it’s too late. Avery is tired of her behavior, and in addition to divorce, he wants full custody of their daughter. I do understand Avery; Juliette has been out of control for months. I hope that this will motivate her to get help. In other news, this episode did have some lighter moments that were much needed. I loved that Will and Kevin tried to set Gunnar up and that Gunnar failed miserably. I really enjoy Will and Gunnar’s bromance. What could I have done without in this episode? Maddie Conrad. She has to stop complaining about how she wants to be famous and how people treat her like a kid. I couldn’t care less about her relationship with Colt, either. I could have done without Markus, too, but I don’t think he’s going to be around for much longer. Overall I liked this episode better than the previous one. I think we’re starting to make progress in most of the stories which is very refreshing!

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch- Scarlett and Deacon continue to deal with Beverly’s death, and Juliette tries to improve her life.
Best Scene- Deacon tells Scarlett that she was right to take Beverly off life support. This scene was so emotional. Charles Esten and Clare Bowen were phenomenal.
Best Actress- Clare Bowen
Best Decision- Juliette firing her staff.
Most Annoying- Maddie Conrad. Listen to your mother, Maddie. I promise that she knows what’s better for you than Juliette Barnes.
Biggest Jerk- Markus Keen (again!)
Funniest Scene- Gunnar trying to hit on that woman. His speech was absolutely hilarious, and it showed he has no game.
Best Mentor- Rayna James. I think she’s going to be really good for Layla. I loved the song that she helped Layla write.

Quotes -
1. Gunnar: “You all suck as wing men.” Will: “Well it’s pretty hard when you’re choking right out of the gate.”
2. Luke: “Don’t go around trying to play cool mom with someone else’s kid just because you’ve abandoned your own.”
3. Rayna: “If I didn’t work with people who had complicated lives there wouldn’t be anyone to make music with.”
4. Avery: “How the hell am I supposed to work with crazy?”



Once Upon a Time – 5.04 – The Broken Kingdom
BY Missions

I really love Once Upon a Time and it was one of the first shows that I actually started watching. While I adored the first two episodes of this season, the last two have unfortunately been a bit disappointing, especially this one. The problem is not the pace or the storyline but for me personally the problem is that everything is executed too easily. The writers have these brilliant ideas and storylines which I will dig into in a second but the way they present it is just too “easy” and very cheesy in my opinion. I looked closely in this episode and realized that things happen way too easily. A tiny bit of sand can all of a sudden create an entire kingdom? That is just lazy writing. But now to talk about the actual episode, in which actually a lot happened. In this episode we jumped back and forth in about three or four time periods, which was way too confusing and at one point was just annoying. So we had: “Camelot, a long time ago” where we could see how the relationship between Arthur and Guinevere, who plays a very important role in this episode, started. Then I believe we had “Camelot 5 years before the curse”, where we got to see how Arthur was only focused on finding the dagger and almost completely ignored Guinevere on her birthday. The only person who was there for her was Lancelot who escorted her when she went looking for the dagger. We also had “Camelot 6 weeks before the second curse”, where we saw how Mary tried to convince David that Arthur was evil, which thankfully worked, even though for a second I thought it would not work. Last but not least we had “Present Day Storybrooke” where Dark Swan is about to plan something very big and very bad with Merida. I wonder what she has planned. This episode was really all over the place and I had a very hard time concentrating on the different stories and trying to completely understand them. However, I think the idea itself was actually really good, but as I said above, it was executed poorly in my opinion. They made characters that I was beginning to like, for example Arthur, very unlikable, which I guess is important for a villain sometimes, but not like this. Please correct if I said something wrong. I was very confused by the episode.

Grade: C

Best Reason to Watch – We finally find out what happened between Guinevere and Lancelot and why Guinevere “hates” him (since she actually does not). / Merida is finally back and will play a very important role in the upcoming episodes.
Best Character Development - For some reason I thought Mary finally had some development in this episode. She was actually smart for once, lol.
Most Interesting Character - Lancelot and Merida! I was very interested to see what had happened between him and Arthur (+ Guinevere). While I was disappointed with the outcome, I still thought it was interesting. And Merida being part of Dark Swan’s plan, makes her even more interesting. Besides, she knows Lancelot now!
Best Scene – Merida is in Storybrooke and part of Dark Swan’s “big” plan. / Mary and David trick Arthur with the fake dagger. / Lancelot is locked up across from Merida.
Most Annoying Character – Arthur! This episode made me completely hate him. Everything about him is just bad.
Character Worthy of a Better Storyline – Hook, Robin and Zelena. We hardly saw anything of Robin and nothing of Zelena in this episode, which is really sad since Rebecca is such a good actress. And all we see of Hook this season is him kissing Emma. There is so much more they could do with him.
Worst Scene – Arthur uses the Sand of Avalon on Guinevere and on the Kingdom. I already said why I hated that scene. It was way too “easy”!!
Biggest Wish – Please execute these brilliant ideas in a good and beautiful way. There are so many other possibilities most of these scenes could have been written and finally shot. They would have come across less cheesy then. / Give Zelena and Robin an actual storyline. Robin is becoming last season’s Henry.
Biggest Question – What does Dark Swan have planned with Merida?

Best Quotes –
1. Regina: “These two can outlive a cockroach.”
2. David: “You tried to trick me with a catchy title and a comfy chair.”
3. Rumpelstiltskin: “Be careful. Love is a weapon, Deary. The most dangerous weapon of all which means the pain you should worry about isn’t the kind inflicted by a broken sword but the kind that comes from a broken heart.”
4. Guinevere: “Stop trying to mend that sword or your marriage and your kingdom will be broken forever.”



SHIELD - 3.04 - Devils You Know
BY Swanpride

I am not gonna lie: When Daisy said that it felt as if they were driving in circles, my thought was "yeah, I know that feeling" because for around 30 minutes, the show was pretty much spinning its wheel. Daisy is still far, far away from leading the team of Inhumans which was promised to us at the end of last season (though seeing Alicia again was a welcome surprise). We still don't know what exactly Ward's plan is, aside from him wanting to take down SHIELD. And, most important, we don't know why Jemma wants to go back. Instead of answering any of those questions, it piles on a number of new ones. Does Coulson have a bigger plan in all of this? Is Andrew still alive? Why is Bobbi covering for Jemma? Weren't we done with team members having secrets from other team members without any explanation? Why didn't Lash try to kill Daisy? And most important: Who is Lash in his human form? The show points not so subtly into the direction of Rosalind, but I am calling it now, even though I might be totally off the mark: It's Andrew. Werner looked like he just had seen some sort of monster in his last scene. What kept the show firmly in B-territory were basically the last ten minutes, even though they do feel more like a lead in to the next episodes than a conclusion to the current one.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - You like riddles? Here are a bunch of them.
Best Scene - The stand-off between Ward and Hunter, especially when May is thrown into the mix. Best Character - I have become surprisingly invested into Daisy and her cause. It helps that she currently speaks more or less my mind when she talks to Coulson.
Best Twist - Lash having a human form? I really didn't see that coming.
Best Character Interaction - May and Hunter. It is good that at least one of them has common sense.
Best Action - May. Just May.
Most Twisted - Can we talk about the fact that Ward shaped his new group after the organization he intends to take down?
Most underused - Still Bobbi. Even in-universe she is pretty much side-lined at this point.
Biggest head scratcher - Why did May wait so long to inform Coulson? Other than to add to the tension, that is.

Best Quotes -
1. Hunter: "Always in a bloody boot."
2. Fitz: "Sorry. It's tough when people keep things from you."





TBBT - 9.05 - The Perspiration Implementation

Overall I really enjoyed the swordfight bits, mostly because I love swordfights. I haven't seen them used for comedy as much so that was novel. Plus I learned some things. Thanks, Sheldon. I'm not a fan of Barry, but in small doses here, he was tolerable and I wouldn't mind seeing the guys continue taking lessons. Not so much if he's going to be dating Amy, who really needs better taste. The biggest problem I had with this episode though was the B story with Stuart. It's hard to find Stuart funny at all when he's so creepy. They need to tone him down a lot if he's going to make regular appearances. He was good when he was with Howard's mom. Now there's nothing redeeming about him and his low self-esteem. I would rather have spent more time exploring Sheldon and Amy getting back into the dating scene (minus Barry) than the entire unfunny comic store subplot.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - swordfighting
Best Scene / Most Funny - Sheldon trying to pick up women at the bar, especially the grandma
Best Reaction - Penny to Stuart's breast feeding area
Best Reference - Princess Bride ALWAYS
Best Non-Verbals - While Barry's on the phone, the guys all whack each other with their swords. When he stops, they go back to the parry position.
Biggest Product Placement - FitBit
Biggest Huh? - Shouldn't the drama department be here for swordfighting as well? Why are the guys the only ones taking this class? It would have been better if it had been fuller and they could bounce comedy off the bystanders. Surely this show can afford some extras.
Most Creepy - Stuart
Most Tacky - sending a naked photo when asking for a date
Most Long-Reaching Plans - challenging to a duel in 3 years
Least Welcomed Back - Kripke, whom I never like

Best Quotes -
1. Amy: "Well I was hoping the next person I dated would be a little less like Sheldon." Bernadette: "You mean not a scientist?" Penny: "I think she means not a weirdo."
2. Sheldon: "Excuse me, Barry." Barry: "Yes." Sheldon: "When can I stab one of my friends?" Barry: "In fencing we don't call it a stab. We call it a touch." Sheldon: "Uh yes, I'm aware but if I say I want to touch one of my friends, I'll get called into Human Resources."
3. Howard: "My name is Darth Vader. I am your father. Prepare to die."
4. Leonard: "Look at all these activities the university has: rock climbing club, archery, flag football." Sheldon: "Had me at flag. Lost me at football."
5. Sheldon: "I'm not sure I have a dominant leg. They're both pretty submissive."



The Blacklist - 3.04 - The Djinn

This episode didn't do it for me. I liked all the twists but I am so very tired of religion being blamed for everything instead of balancing it out with all the good it does too. Hollywood can take its agenda and leave it off my screen. Other than that, I am super curious as to where Dembe now is and I hope he's reunited with Red soon. I adored how Red said that he was more than a colleague to him and the fact that both men are incredibly loyal to each other is awesome. Currently I am leaning towards the idea that Dembe did not trust his associate and led him on a wild goose chase. At least I hope that's the case. I find Tom's staunch loyalty weird in a stalker kind of way, but the process he goes through to become whatever character he needs to be is thrilling to watch. I hope we get to see more of the con and that Tom continues to be a part of the show. Someday he's going to end up dead but I'll enjoy the ride as long as he stays here. As for Liz and Red, I love how much Liz's dream of having her own family affected Red. It's the one thing he absolutely cannot give her because she's not that carefree, largely innocent person anymore.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - all the twists
Best Moment - Red kicking back in the theater
Best Irony - Liz tells Red that he's a terrible actor
Best Twist - the daughter was the son
Most Preachy - Red
Most Fascinating - watching Tom create his con story
Least Surprising - Dembe was played by the informant
Worst Surprise - to come home and find a wanted fugitive in your house conducting business
Biggest Kick Butt - Dembe
Biggest Yikes - if you are so evil the CIA disavows you, that's a whole new Hitler level of low
Biggest Awww Moment - Lizzie explains her fantasy of a family with Red

Best Quotes -
1. Red: "I'm not sure we should start the party before the hostess arrives, but so be it."
2. Liz: "Listen Tom, I have done so many terrible things. I have hurt so many people." Tom: "I don't care what you've done. Liz, I know who you are. I took that for granted for a long time but I don't now. So you're right. I do have plans. I'm coming to save you." Liz: "Tom, listen…" Tom: "It's too late 'cause I'm already in."
3. Red: "Dembe is more than an associate to me. Please find him."
4. Red: "Hello. I need an ambulance. A man's dying on a cross."
5. Liz: "You're a terrible actor."



Blindspot - 1.05 - Split the Law

Carter needs to go. He's the kind of moustache-twirling, cheesy dialogue spewing, politics-wielding, flat, cartoon government villain that is overplayed and hard to take seriously. A hero is only as good as the villain they play off of and this one is beyond lame. I'd love to see him killed and have someone with more dimension take his place or at least someone who is not so predictable. Having him as one focus of the episode brought down the grade and my interest. It wasn't a question of if he was going to find a mole in the unit but whom. It wasn't a question of if he was going to try to kill Jane, but how she would survive. That's the kind of flat writing that does not inspire in a story that for the most part has been otherwise good. Speaking of the good, I liked Weller and Jane's interactions again and especially that they know just what to say to bring the other off the ledge. Yes, it's still creepy but at least it cut the emoangsting short. I also loved everything about the cemetery fight and Jane's memories are getting far more interesting every episode. Who was stockpiling children and why would they take a kid who they know would have created a lot of publicity when she went missing? No child should of course be kidnapped but that was exceptionally stupid when part of a covert operation. I mean the town still memorializes the day she disappeared.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - the action is superb
Best Scene / Best Action - cemetery fight
Best Character Interaction - Weller and Jane, like usual, and yet it's also the creepiest
Best Save - Mayfair keeps Carter from assassinating Jane
Best Banter - Zapata and Reade
Best Standoff - forget the terrorists or the hostage takers when different departments of the US government pull weapons on each other
Worst Time to Break Down - Jane's memories come right when they are tracking a dirty bomb
Biggest Awww Moment - Jane tells Weller that Taylor being taken wasn't his fault
Biggest Betrayal - Weller's sister who ekes out Zapata simply because she has the nerve to betray Weller in his own house
Biggest Smug Douche - Carter, who is beyond love to hate and into straight up hate and frankly, boredom
Biggest Huh? - Why are they giving the team potassium iodide if they're staying in headquarters? At least wait until they're going out in the field if it has a time limit for working.
Biggest Meddler - Weller's sister
Least Surprising - the hostage situation is NOT about pensions and the terrorist is NOT dead
Most Stubborn - Weller, who refuses to even consider that Jane may not be Taylor
Most Scary - Jane's child abduction site memories
Most Impressive Take Down - Jane and Dodi's henchman
Most in Need of a Program - Zapata, who needs therapy if her gambling addiction leads her to becoming a mole for Carter
The "What the Heck?" Award - Weller's sister deserves to be Gibbs' smacked. Who is invited to stay with someone and then invites someone the owner hates into their house. Have you no decency? I don't care if you are trying to mend your family. Invite your father into your own place when you get one. Don't force Weller to come home and find his dad there.
Cheesiest Line: "Tom Carter, deputy director of the CIA, and this place…this place doesn't exist."

Best Quotes -
1. Weller: "You've been through so much. If I'm making this harder for you, then just tell me 'cause that's the last thing that I want. All these expectations…I should never have put you in that situation." Jane: "Kurt..." Weller: "I should never have let them take you. I'm sorry." Jane: "It wasn't your fault." Weller: "I've heard that my whole life." Jane: "But you haven't heard it from me. It wasn't your fault."
2. Jane: "I thought we were all on the same team." Carter: "Oh, now that is adorable."
3. Mayfair: "Smugglers have been moving cesium out of Abkhazia, selling it to terrorists on the black market." Reade: "Apparently in leaky containers."
4. Jane: "Look at how he's covering the room, optimizing angles and sight lines. Is that part of MWA training?" Zapata: "The MWA has training?"
5. Zapata: "Do I need to worry about you?" Reade: "Nope, but you're gonna do it anyway."



Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - 1.02 - Josh's Girlfriend is Really Cool!

I cannot watch Rebecca or Paula any longer. First off, I am offended by the Hollywood notion that women cannot be friends with each other without it getting into a competition or a scuffle over some guy. That's completely ridiculous. It's about time that Hollywood creates strong female friendships that don't revolve around romance of any kind and which celebrate each other's victories instead of tear each other down in some catty jealous fit. It's a complete stereotype that needs to be debunked. It's not entertaining AT ALL. Yes Hollywood, you really can have 2 or more strong females on the same show and not have a bitter rivalry between them. Second, this show is entirely too long and simply not funny. Every time I get to the 22 minute mark, I'm expecting the show to be about over only to find that it's only halfway there. The songs are generally either stupid or loathsome and the characters are terrible. The only things I really liked from the pilot, like Greg's snark, are completely missing in this one. Two episodes are enough. Dropped!

Grade: D
Verdict - Dropped

Best Reason to Watch - Rebecca is as zany as in the pilot so if you liked it, you will probably like this one
Best Scene - Rebecca apologizes to Paula
Best Song - opening credits
Most Disturbing Song - "Feeling Kinda Naughty" could rival "To Excess" by Kooman + Dimond
Most Fun - Paula's victory dance
Biggest Tip - Rebecca tries to pay the bouncer $500 so he refuses to let her in on the grounds that either she's a cop or a drug dealer
Most Awkward - the entire grocery scene
Most Weird Reaction - Rebecca kisses Josh's girlfriend's hand
Worst Stereotype - females can and are friends and that's something that should finally come across in Hollywood
Worst Friend - Rebecca, who keeps shafting Paula and not caring about what's up with her because she's too wrapped up in her own world
Least Funny - jokes about statutory rape
The "Take It Down a Few Decibels" Award - every time Valencia and Rebecca talk to each other, their voices go into high squeal mode
The "Say What?" Award - Matching what foods you eat to your blood type? Is that a thing?
The "Even I'm More in the Know" Award - …and that's just sad. I used to like Vampire Weekend. And no Rebecca, it's not a weekend away with vampires.
The "I Can So Relate" Award - I'm big into alone time too. Also meeting people I don't want to see in the grocery store.
The "Say What?" Award - How in the world could anything at West Covina be so hopping that they won't let people in? This isn't LA and nothing in West Covina except made a frat club or golf course should be members only.
The "No, Just No" Award - stalking your ex is bad enough but stalking his girlfriend too is even worse

Best Quotes -
1. Rebecca: "What's up with your resting Maggie Smith face?"
2. Valencia: "Do all people who go to Harvard say it as much as you do?" Rebecca: "Yeah."
3. Rebecca: "Hey I didn't move here for him, remember? I moved here because I needed a change and Josh just happens to be here. Get it straight." Paula: "Oh are we still doing that?"
4. Greg: "I'm gonna go out on a limb and say telling the truth from the beginning probably would have been the better option here."
5. Paula: "I have never met anyone in my life who lies to themselves as much as you do."



The Goldbergs - 3.05 - Boy Barry

It's a great change to watch someone pursuing Barry instead of Barry always trying to impress other people. That's what made this episode so much better than the last couple. It was also inspired to have the storyline of the adults mesh with the kids. I love how Erica inadvertently taught Beverly an important lesson too, although it was inevitable that Beverly would have to make nice with Bill. It's good to see her bend sometimes. All kudos to Murray as well for not sulking in the situation, but trying to be proactive. It's a good look on him. Mostly though it was the end that did me in. I love how this show can make me laugh and awww at the exact same time. And that's what keeps me coming back and makes The Goldbergs my #1 comedy.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - always the heart
Best Scene - Erica reconciles Barry and Lainey and inadvertently gets Bill back into her dad's life too
Best Moment - Bill leaves and Beverly sits in Murray's lap
Best Visual - Barry and Beverly running in the rain together to patch relationships with Bill and Lainey and then Bill running in the rain to Murray. Good thing they live close to each other.
Best Halloween Costume, Worst Everyday Wear - Barry's Boy George look
Best Nostalgia - classic TV and the fact that this show is modeled after it
Worst Nostalgia - the bushy moustache, which mostly looked bad on everyone
Most Screwed - Randy, who keeps getting jerked around but never gets a sale
Most High School - Laney's attempt to embarrass herself just makes the whole thing popular
Most Least in Sight - Why hello there Adam in the last 15 seconds? I didn't even realize we hadn't seen you all episode until then. Hope you had a great work vacation.
Worst Move - Oh Bill, you can't force a man to choose between his wife and his best friend. In the 80's that decision was wife every time.
The "Say What?" Award - Did anyone actually think Boy George was hot? Hmm. That should have been a big red flag, Barry.
The "Yeah, I've Got to Agree" Award - Beverly's winking puppy eyes look is very creepy / Lainey's waxing poetic over Barry's lips makes me nauseous too
The "Welcome Back" Award - Lainey's dad

Best Quotes -
1. Announcer: "In life, there are certain relationships that define who you are - your first teen crush, your best friend, your family. These are the relationships that matter the most but they're also the hardest because when you truly love someone, you sometimes hold on too tight afraid that you'll lose them. But the truth is when you give the people you love most just a little space, you'll find the place they really want to be is right at your side."
2. Bill: "Your son walks his own path. I see what Lainey sees in him." Murray: "I don't."
3. Beverly: "Bill, you don't have a woman in your life telling you all the things you do that are wrong and stupid. I will be that woman." Bill: "Actually, I really haven't missed that very much."
4. Murray: "Enough. You, me, and Bill are going to talk this out." Beverly: "You want to talk?" Murray: "Of course not, but you forced me into it."
5. Beverly: "That was an amazing thing you just did, honey." Erica: "I guess sometimes two people just need each other no matter how weird it seems to everyone else."



Grandfathered - 1.04 - Deadbeat

Grandfathered knows heart and that's half of a great comedy for me, which is probably why it's likely to be my last comedy standing for newbies this fall. Only Life in Pieces is still around as competition. I think this was actually my favorite episode of the show too. It wasn't hysterically funny but the understanding between Sara and Jimmy made the middle stand out and the ending was fantastic. I especially like how they each owned up to their past mistakes and saw things from the other's point of view. That's a maturity that has been lacking in the show so far. I hope they continue to play it smart. Kudos to the character development in this episode. Plus, The Cure. Need I say more.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - character development
Best Scene - Sara tells Jimmy why she decided not to tell him about Gerald
Best Awww Moment - Jimmy watches Gerald's second birthday party with the family
Best Reaction - Jimmy and Richie Sambora to Frederick singing, "Frederick the Farmer"
Best Dad - Gerald, who dresses up in a chicken suit to please his daughter
Best Music - Pictures of You by The Cure
Most Nostalgic - Richie Sambora of Bon Jovi guests on the show
Worst Plan - Criss Angel as magician for a kid's party
Worst Party Game - True Confessions by Jimmy and Sara
Biggest Ouch - Frederick sings that Jimmy is a deadbeat
Least Likely to be Ready in 5 minutes - Jimmy and his extra long decision making and super sized morning routine
The "Welcome Back" Award - Patrick Fischler from OUaT and Mad Men

Best Quotes -
1. Kid: "Are you the bathroom lady?" Annelise: "I used to be so much more."
2. Jimmy: "Gerald, I've hosted Mariah Carey's 40th birthday party for the last 5 years. I think I can throw a party for a 2 year old who's not even famous."
3. Jimmy: "Annelise, I need you to throw me a party." Annelise: "Now? I'm visiting my grandmother's grave." Jimmy: "Is she going somewhere?"
4. Frederick: "Wow, that's a lot of complicated stuff for a kid's party."
5. Jimmy: "Alright, I get it. I screwed up, but you know what? I know how to make this up to Edie. You know how?" Gerald: "By paying for her college education?"
6. Vanessa (holding a cake knife): "I just cleaned this. Don't make me get it dirty again."



How to Get Away with Murder - 2.05 - Meet Bonnie

We're only in the 5th episode and I think it has to be declared the Season of Asher already. I haven't felt such a complete reversal for a character in years. I like that Asher is struggling to do the right thing throughout this episode, despite people with contrary motives pushing him to follow their agenda. It shows a steadfastness that his character lacked in season 1. Things are now getting difficult for him as he is slowly pulled deeper into the abyss that started with Lila's murder. Bonnie was also a marvel with Liza Weil doing her finest work. From pulling at Asher's strings to breaking down to Annalise, Weil was breathtaking. Still my biggest criticism of the episode was that we really didn’t learn much about either Asher or Bonnie. Asher's role in the lake incident is still foggy since we have no clue what that incident contains. We got confirmation that Bonnie was sexually abused but that seemed like mostly a given. It still doesn't tell us how she's connected to Annalise or why she feels so indebted to her that she would give up her own freedom to protect Annalise.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - Bonnie, Asher, and Frank
Best Scene - Annalise defends Bonnie from the students who are going all lynch mob on her
Best Character Interaction - Bonnie and Asher
Best Moment - Annalise breaks down in front of Bonnie and Frank
Best Acting - Liza Weil, who takes Davis' crown for this episode only
Best Reaction - students to hearing that Asher might be wearing a wire
Best Reference - Heisenberg
Biggest Facepalm - Wes opens the suitcase without using gloves or anything
Most Improved - Asher
Most Persistent - Wes, who won't take a suitcase of cash as an answer
Most Masterful Manipulator - Frank, who takes Annalise's crown for this episode only
Most Obnoxious - every single one of the students not named Asher

Best Quotes -
1. Annalise: "You get away from her. You want to know the truth? Asher was going to testify against everyone in this house so Bonnie told him that she killed Sam in order to save your a** because that's what we do around here. Ruin everyone's life to save yours: Nate's, mine, and now Bonnie's. Who's next, huh? Whose life do you want to destroy to stay free?" Michaela: "Why didn't you just tell us?" Annalise: "Because I'm trying to protect you like always. When are you gonna finally accept that?"
2. Oliver: "Hey, do you think Annalise would ever pay me? I mean I do all this work for her for free." Connor: "You don't want to work for Annalise." Michaela: "Trust your boyfriend on that one."
3. Asher: "Did you…you cut a deal for yourself, didn't you?" Dad: "Of course I did." Asher: "God, is there any part of you that thought that maybe I should just do this to protect my kid and not to protect myself?" Dad: "I'm protecting the both of us." Asher: "But mostly you, dad."
4. Asher: "Sam Keating was not a good guy. He knocked up a law student and he strangled her with his bare hands. Who cares if he's dead?" Sinclair: "Me." Asher: "Why?" Sinclair: "He was murdered, Asher. Maybe working in that house has messed with your head a bit, but people can't get away with killing each other and definitely not if you're a woman who's responsible for educating an entire generation of law students." Asher: "What? Do you think the world is going to be filled with Annalise Mini-Me's? That we're going to be walking around killing people for fun?"
5. Frank: "Where are you going?" Annalise: "To kick some a**."



iZombie - 2.03 - Real Dead Housewife of Seattle

Ha! iZombie got its humor back and it makes all the difference. Sure high maintenance Liv got old about 2/3 of the way in but she was a heck of a lot of fun in the meantime. I laughed more in the first half of this episode than the last two combined. Plus, Peyton returned and I am all for that. I've missed her. If Gilda isn't lying about the cake, then we might be in for a reconciliation far sooner than I was hoping. While the perpetrator was pretty obvious again, the episode did have some nice twists too like Gilda being Vaughn's daughter or the full on zombie doctor. I think I prefer Liv's pale style than the green skinned look the once not-so-good doctor is currently sporting. He looks like he's been hanging out on a cheesy D horror movie set. In as much as I want Gilda gone so Peyton can move back in, I will say she is growing on me a little mostly through her ties to other characters. Vaughn and the Major as murderer plotline still need to go though.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - iZombie found its humor again
Best Character Interaction - Liv and Clive
Best New Look - Liv is smashing in her new style
Best Reaction - Ravi to Liv getting a call about the new fabulous shoes the stylist found…or to get Liv to leave him alone. You choose.
Easiest Way to Get Rid of Your Enemies - zombie kill
Worst Plan - Vaughn allows Liv to see Major with him at his work
Biggest Woo Hoo - Peyton's back
Biggest Say What? - Gilda is Vaughn's illegitimate daughter
Biggest Reaction - Taylor's husband puts a fist through his coffee table when finding out his wife screwed Vaughn
Biggest Awww Moment - Liv realizes that Peyton brought her a birthday cake
Least Surprising - Gilda and Major start screwing / Liv's new BFF is a murderer
Most Surprising - Liv goes full out zombie eyes on Bethany after she maces her
Most Needing to Go (character) - it's a toss-up between Vaughn and Gilda. No, it's definitely Vaughn.
Most Needing to Go (plot) - Major as drug using murderer for hire
Most on Point Song - the soon-to-be redead guy is pleading for Major to let him go when Voices Carry by Til Tuesday comes on. "Oh Shush" indeed.
Most Awkward but Still Awww - the Peyton and Ravi hug
The "What the Heck was That?" Award - Liv freaks out and tries to throw water on Vaughn. That'll go over well.
The "There's No Cone of Silence…Oh Just Forget It" Award - I give up. All characters, especially those with super secret secrets, will freely blab in whatever public place they just happen to be in, about said secrets. At this point it's as useless as grousing about female detectives running in high heels to chase a suspect or people who don't use gloves at crime scenes.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Ona Grauer from Intelligence / David Starzyk from about a million guest spots, making him one of the "Oh That Guy" guys

Best Quotes -
1. Liv: "Oh I'll just wait here…for you to pull up the car." Clive: "What am I? Driving Miss Crazy?"
2. Liv: "I am literally going through hell. Do you even care?" Ravi: "Okay, you've literally forgotten the meaning of the word literally."
3. Vaughn: "There's a reason why I'm not getting hitched, detective." Liv: "Because you can't legally marry your own reflection?" Vaughn: "Burn."
4. Ravi: "Look, you and Peyton have been best friends since college. You just don't casually walk away from that. I bet she'll want to be back in your life. Maybe not right away, but eventually and when she does, I hope you've left the door open."
5. Major: "Don't worry. I'm on it. I crossed another name off this morning." Gilda: "Not a zombie." Major: "Not a zombie. Just a normal human being. I'm allowed to NOT kill those, right?"



Life in Pieces - 1.05 - Babe Secret Phone Germs

At first I wasn't sure about the way Life in Pieces is blocked into 4 separate stories. Now I really like it because I always know if a segment isn't for me, it will be over quickly. That was great news for this one because I couldn't stand 2 segments, ½ of another one, and really loved the second. The whole boob thing in the first was juvenile and completely unfunny. Way to make your entire family look like psycho imbeciles. I am also not a fan of shows where kids brat their way into getting what they want so the third segment made me want to Gibbs' slap everyone except Joan. She rocked this one. I'd thumbs up Heather too but their whole family was obnoxious about their phones. Nothing Sophia did was any different than the others. Thank goodness, there was Colleen and Matt's story this time. I thought it was sweet but foolish of Matt to quit his job so they didn't have to sneak around. Here's hoping it doesn't come back to bite him but at least the obnoxious co-worker is out of the picture.

Grade: C+

Best Reason to Watch - Colleen and Matt in this one
Best Scene - Joan gives Heather advice on how to deal with your kids growing up
Best Consequences - John has to take Sophia's phone away
Best Product Placement - Diary of a Wimpy Kid
Least Surprising - skunk in the house
Most Romantic / Least Thought Out - Matt quits his job so he can date Colleen
Most Obnoxious - Will, the co-worker
Most Manipulative - Sophia, who cons John into buying her a phone
Worst Family Meeting EVER - Tyler's well-endowed new girlfriend meets the family and they are all distracted by her boobs
The "Sad but True" Award - Families are so busy on their phones that they can't even have a conversation while eating a meal together. Sometimes I hate this century.

Best Quotes -
1. Heather: "Where's his starter girlfriend? You know, the freckly faced nerd that he's supposed to hold hands with and make mixed tapes for." Jen: "I don't know. He went straight for the 'I Sold an App' girlfriend."
2. Greg: "It's happening, isn't it?" Jen: "Yeah." Greg: "We're the crazy parents." Jen: "Yeah, but our baby's gonna live forever." Greg: "She'll be like the Highlander."
3. Greg: "Wow! She is….not as pretty as you are. Nope, not by a mile." Jen: "You really stuck the landing there."
4. Heather: "I'm not ready for this." Joan: "You never will be so you do what I did. You let the first 2 go and you baby the third one until you die." Jen: "Do us all a favor and don't do that."
5. Pest Control Guy: "I've got 9 kids. All boys and girls."



Limitless - 1.05 - Personality Crisis

This is a great example of a bad beginning giving way to a great ending. The first 10 minutes of this episode drove me nuts because it was largely recapitation and filler. It was slow and boring. Then they sent Brian in to talk with the kid and everything picked up. By the time the episode was ¾ done, I didn't even care that there was still too much filler. That ending monologue might be my favorite part of the series thus far. I like how Brian realizes that not only does his intellect switch on NZT but his whole personality does too. Maybe that's what Morra's problem is. NZT has burned out his compassion and humanity. I like that Brian is taking steps to stay human and the very best version of himself. Watching him humble his NZT side was magnificent and makes me want to see more of his character. What a difference a couple of episodes have made. I'm totally Team Normal Brian now.

Grade: B (A- for everything after the first 10 minutes)

Best Reason to Watch / Most Improved - Brian has come a long way in only 2 episodes. This is a character I can really get behind.
Best Scene - the ending monologue
Best NZT Skill (after total recall of course) - 2 keyboard typing
Biggest Awww Moment - Brian learns that Chris died
Biggest Surprise - Harris and Rooks are together / Brian shares what he knows to Harris this early
Biggest Huh? - Why are they giving Brian NZT before his training? Wouldn't it make more sense for him to train as his everyday self?
Most Bizarre / Biggest Filler - The claymation recap for zero reason and the montage of clay death afterwards. Did this episode not have enough context that they wasted the first 5 minutes? Following with Brian's bladder and martial arts no know-how, didn't help either.
Crummiest Break - the kid got shot in the process and died
Worst Security - writing the password code on the door jamb
The "Welcome Back" Award - Derek Goh from Eye Candy

Best Quotes -
1. Regular Brian: "Just because you remember everything doesn't mean you know everything. We are not omniscient or today would have gone very differently and if putting myself first means being okay with what happened to Chris Garber, then I'm not playing. I mean you tell me I've got to be ruthless to survive but if that means killing the part of myself that makes being alive worthwhile, that is not how I'm getting through this. That is not how we’re getting through this so deal with it. You don't have a choice really because by the time I take my next pill, the damage is already going to be done."
2. Brian: "I can be really annoying when I'm not on NZT." Ike: "We've noticed."
3. Brian: "The worst part of this job is learning about things you never knew you needed to worry about. For instance, weapons of mass disruption. Sounds like a really bad band name."
4. NZT Brian: "You know what happens in Supermax prison? Probably not death by giant boot. Of course if Mr. Sands finds out that you told your FBI BFF about the secret mission he gave you, you will be praying for death by giant boot."
5. Brian: "And if Bruce Lee taught me anything, it's that I needed to unlearn everything."



Quantico - 1.04 - Kill

This was a decent episode of Quantico for me. I loved all things Shelby and Alex. Whether they are sparring or having heartfelt conversations, these two made the episode. I especially like how Shelby is worried about Alex's mental state when they are going into the training exercises. Pulling Booth in made a lot of sense too, given that she doesn't know he's a spy. I also enjoyed Shaw coming clean on her son's arrest and future parole to Nimah. It was a smart play to inspire Nimah to come back and fulfill Shaw's plans for her. However, the overall story is starting to unravel fast. Why have they been trying to frame Alex since she first got to Quantico? At first it seemed like they were going to frame any of a number of people, but now it feels like they specifically targeted Alex. If so, what makes her the best candidate? Is it about her father? Why do they suddenly want to kill her? It feels like we're getting all the wrong answers, piling on even more questions, and twirling in circles instead of getting anywhere, which always makes me nervous in a highly serialized show. (Thanks, Chris Carter for my utter lack of TV faith.) Still, the characters have grabbed my attention and there's always at least one good twist involved so I can't wait to see where this ends up. Here's hoping the writers know exactly where that is.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the relationship between Alex and Shelby and watching Alex own killing her dad
Best Scene - Alex and Shelby get real with each other
Best Job - fake employee in FBI training neighborhood
Best Back Story - Shaw's son's back story and how much it hurts her
Best Twist - Shaw knows O'Connor is conniving behind her back
Best Action - Shelby vs. Alex in her house
Best Roommate - Shelby
Biggest Awww Moment - Shaw tells Nimah about how she hopes her son does NOT get parole
Biggest Huh? - Why do they want their best trainee to wash out? Were they planning on framing her and using her washing out as an excuse for the bombing? This makes no sense to me.
Biggest Douche - Natalie, who needs to work on her people skills big time because always having something to prove makes life exhausting
Biggest Question - What secret about Shelby's parents did Alex uncover?
Worst Plan? - deciding to shoot first and ask questions never with Alex only works as a plan if the person who gave it is actually behind the attack
Most Creepy - Elias, who started flirting with Simon and is now stalking him in the creepiest creepster way possible
Least Surprising - Alex hasn't had any friends before Quantico
Scariest Decorating - Who has an abstract of a gun on their wall?
The "Say What?" Award - Shelby's house doesn't have an alarm system? That seems odd.

Best Quotes -
1. Shaw: "Don't let your guilt re-write history."
2. Caleb: "When did Harry Potter become James Bond?"
3. Natalie: "This ain't shooting skeet at the country club. This is the real deal and I've got the battle scars to prove I'm up for it." Shelby: "No scars on me. I guess that means I'm more qualified."
4. Caleb: "Wow, you're like a boss at this thing." Shelby: "Wait. My life is in your hands?" Caleb: "Calm down, Blake Lively. I'll make sure you don't chip your French tips." Shelby: "You are lucky you're an analyst because you have friendly fire written all over you."
5. Caleb: "I guess now that you're here, you're probably gonna report me." Shelby: "I'll only report you if you can't keep up."



Scorpion - 2.05 - Super Fun Guys

This was one rollercoaster of a episode, chock full of utter nonsense but still fun. Yeah Scorpion is often a leave your brain at the door type of show but I don't think there's ever been an episode that made less sense than this one. They shot a nuclear missile into a mine in a foreign country for goodness sakes. There ought to be some consequences. Still the character development, particularly with Sylvester, was fantastic. I loved how he is confident enough to say he's not doing something now and especially to say it to Walter. Speaking of, I'm loving the changes in Walter too. He's not near as annoying as season 1 and that's a great change. In fact, it's #1 on my wish list. Nice to see that a fun show like Scorpion can get even better.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the fast pace combined with sweet Sylvester moments
Worst Reason to Watch - not a single ounce of realism is in this episode at all
Worst Spelling - Ray
Worst Plumber - definitely Ray
Worst Mix-Up -Ray confused the National Association of Theater Owners with NATO
Best Scene - tie - both of the times Sylvester was there for Megan
Best Awww Moment - Megan asks Sylvester to be there for her when she wakes up from her procedure
Best Plan - Sylvester suggests that they dress up in costume to get through
Best Reaction - Sylvester to it being the Super Fun Guy movie (both times)
Best Reference - Jesse Owens
Best Pep Talk - Ray talks Sylvester onto Happy's motorcycle
Biggest Pervert - Toby and his innuendo
Biggest Fortune Cookie - Ray and his advice
Biggest Rip-Off - this whole plot sounds like Argo
Most Improved - Toby as a boxer
Most Depressing - superheroes can never be happy or fulfilled according to Sylvester
Most Embarrassing - everyone one in costume
Most Likely to be Confused with AC/DC - love the schoolboy costume Cabe is wearing
Most Convenient - a hatch that just happens to go to the missile and doesn't have anything big impeding it
Sweetest Gift - Toby gives Happy a toy motorcycle for her dollhouse / Walter gives Sylvester a Super Fun Guy costume
Strangest Musical Interlude / Biggest Ear Worm - Mambo #5 by Lou Bega
The "Say What?" Award - They just set off a nuclear weapon in a foreign country. Hmmmm. Yeah.
The "Yeah, I Don't Think So" Award - My grandparents lived in farm country so the first thing we learned was not to mess around in silos or anything filled with corn because you go under like quicksand and can drown in it. Unless there was a lot less sand in those towers than it looked like, Happy would have sunk to the bottom the second she landed. It certainly would not be compact enough for her to stand on the sand.
The "Sucks to be Good at Your Job" Award - Happy gets the worst position because she's the most qualified
The "Got to Agree" Award - I'm with Walter about comic books

Best Quotes -
1. Happy: "You're not part of Scorpion." Ray: "But I live here." Happy: "So does a possum in the rafters."
2. Walter: "I want Homeland to double our fee. I feel absurd. I don't like feeling absurd." Sylvester: "I can't believe I'm not there with you." Terrorist: "I can't believe I got caught by you people."
3. Walter: "What is our goal?" Cabe: "We need to get to the nuke." Walter: "Right. Okay and what's our obstacle?" Toby: "Guaranteed death from Eastern Bloc mobsters."
4. Ray: "Now get on." Sylvester: "What? On Happy's organ donation machine?" Ray: "You want to stop feeling powerless. You want to be a hero like your pals are being right now. Then this is your moment, Big Fella. Seize it like a superhero would."
5. Toby: "Settle down, Beavis. I doubt anyone cares what nerd burg Super Dork Guy hails from."



Stitchers - 1.11 - When Darkness Falls

Stitchers was one of the few shows I watched all the way through over the summer. It started off rough but then I really liked it. The characters grew on me and it had a great twist to the standard procedural with a nice overarching story. Kind of a Flatliners meets Monk thing that I urge people to try. This episode though feels like we're missing a few. Considering that when we last left off both Cameron and Fisher were dying, it's a bit disconcerting that they are alive and well in this one with nary a word hinted at their oh so precarious situations. I get time jump. I don't get unresolved cliffhanger. Therefore I think they are shuffling episodes out of order so this Halloween themed one isn't shown in November. Nice planning, ABC Family or whatever you're going to be calling yourself next year. Thanks for the banners running across my screen to announce that by the way. Other than the episode mixing, this was a good return for Stitchers. I love that Kirsten is getting more human by the episode and the gentle scares were ripe for the season. Yes, the murderer makes no sense and the plot is paper thin, but it was good to have these characters interacting on my screen again and to get back to the Stitcher program.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - Kirsten actually shows emotional growth
Best Scene - Kirsten outsmarts the bad guy
Best Use of the 20th Century - cell phones as flashlights
Best Guess - Fisher figures out what Linus is supposed to be for Halloween
Least Surprising - Devon was the good guy and his evil twin is the kidnapper
Biggest Surprise - Kirsten does feelings
Biggest Horror Trope - black cat freak out
Biggest WTH - How did the police miss that Devon had a twin?
Most Interesting Costume - pregnant zombie
Worst Way to Wake Up - with a big old kitchen knife in front of your face
Worst Guest - Kirsten comes in, eats Cameron's food, drinks straight out of the milk carton, and then takes his bed and kicks him to the couch without even asking
Cheesiest Line - Kirsten: "You're my ghost." Gavin: "No, I'm your nightmare."
The "Wait a Minute" Award - Are we not going to talk about the fact that Cameron was dead when we left off in the last episode? Are we not even going to discuss the fact that Fisher was shot and in critical condition? What the heck, show! I call foul on that play.
The "That a Girl" Award - Kirsten may be seeing ghosts and she brought the iron poker out to swing at it. The Winchesters would be proud.

Best Quotes -
1. Cameron: "No one's out here." Camille: "He was. I just saw him." Cameron: "Okay how about we put the knife away, Jason?"
2. Linus: "Did you guys know that the term 'selfie' was invented by an Australian?" Camille: "And did you know that the term 'Who Cares?' was invented to describe this conversation?"
3. Camille (talking about candy corn): "What do you have against corn?" Cameron: "Uh corn of the cob, nothing. Corn tortillas, bring it. Popcorn, corn chowder, corn muffins - I'm all over that, but pretend corn trying to be corn…pass." Camille: "Read the first ingredient." Cameron: "Corn syrup." Camille: "Thank you."
4. Cameron: "A girl is missing. You can't throw a party where the kidnapper lived." Camille: "Because?" Cameron: "Because it's wrong on every level." Camille: "I think there's a grey area where it's a wee bit right."
5. Camille: "Missing girl, possibly murdered. Happy Halloween."



Supernatural - 11.03 - The Bad Seed

Too much time spent on angels and way too much time searching for Metatron. Can't we just pretend he doesn't exist and move on? I still like Rowena but she's becoming this season's Bela and I liked Bela better. Amara started out interesting but there's only so many times someone can demand to be fed. Best part of the episode was the brothers talking in tandem, secrets are out, and Crowley. I can never get enough Crowley.

Grade: C+

Best Reason to Watch - Jensen did a fine job directing it
Best Scene - angel and demon grouse at a bar together
Best Moments - times when the brothers speak in tandem
Best Flashback to Early Seasons - woman listening to music while about to be attacked in an alley reminds me of the opening scene of Shadows
Worst Get-Up - Dean's tourist costume, although it made me laugh
Worst Name Ever - mega coven
Worst Idea Ever - involving Metatron in anything because then he appears on my screen again
Smartest Plan - Rowena NOT keeping the codex and book together
Most Likely to Bite the Hand that Feeds Her - Amara, who has "rabid dog biting through the leash" written all over her
The "Isn't This the Start of a Really Bad Joke?" Award - an angel and a demon walk into a bar
The "Welcome Back" Award - Tasya Teles, who was Echo on The 100
The "Recycle, Rinse, Repeat" Award - Lane Edwards is in Dark Side of the Moon too

Best Quotes -
1. Claudette: "You can't do this. I have rights." Dean: "And I have a fake badge."
2. Minion: "She looks at me like she wants to eat me." Crowley: "She wants to eat everyone. Don't take it personally."
3. Dean: "Listen, before you finish what you're about to say, know that we are the only thing between you and Crowley's ninjas." Claudette: "But I didn't try to hurt him. I am a nobody. I'm worse than nobody. I'm nobody's third cousin who doesn't even get invited to dinner."
4. Dean: "Why isn't he answering the phone?" Sam: "Because he's a d** and that's not breaking news."
5. Magda: "Well we were being burned or hung by the thousands." Claudette: "It put a lid on our enthusiasm."
6. Rowena: "What new hell has Dean Winchester unleashed upon the world?"





TBBT - 9.04 - The 2003 Approximation
Grade: B-
~I really don't agree with Penny and Leonard putting their life on hold for Sheldon. This could be a good growth opportunity for the character. However, and I'm not sure how, that Thor and Dr. Jones song started to grow on me.


The Blacklist - 3.03 - Eli Matchett
Grade: B+
~Another great episode even if I already saw this case of the week on Leverage. I love that Tom's back even though I facepalmed when Lizzie called Ressler. She's smarter than that.


Code Black - 1.02 - We Plug Holes
Grade: B
~The awwww's keep coming as one patient's story is more touching than the next. This show is getting to my heart. Still loving the interaction between Rorish and Jesse.


Code Black - 1.03 - Pre-Existing Conditions
Grade: C+
~I wasn't feeling this episode as much as the first two and then they took a walk on the wild side and I started singing along. Also Rorish helping a mother grieve was pretty darn awesome and led way to the best acting of the night.


CSI: Cyber - 2.02 - Heart Me
Grade: B
~Appropriately creepy case, show back on track


CSI: Cyber - 2.03 - Brown Eyes, Blue Eyes
Grade: C-
~Good twists, very preachy, convoluted bad guy


Fresh Off the Boat - 2.04 - The Fall Ball
Grade: B
~This wasn't as funny as usual but it had some great moments with Louis and Eddie. The character interaction between Jessica and her mother-in-law was fantastic as well. Plus it was good to see Honey again.


The Goldbergs -3.04 - I Caddyshacked the Pool
Grade: C+
~The moral of The Goldbergs these days seems to be the kids brat and everyone bends over backwards to give them what they want. That sucks. Points though for Murray's speech and Barry coming through for Erica.


Grandfathered - 1.03 - Guys' Night
Grade: B-
~a good ending made up for a mostly blah episode


The Grinder - 1.03 - The Curious Disappearance of Mr. Donovan
Grade: So painful I turned it off mid way
Verdict: Dropped


iZombie - 2.02 - Zombie Bro
Grade: B-
~better than the pilot but about 9,000 bros too many


Life in Pieces - 1.04 - Prison Baby Golf Picking
Grade: B-
~not as funny as other episodes but better than most comedies this week


NCIS - 13.05 - Lockdown
Grade: C+
~I'm a few seasons behind on NCIS so I have no idea who the new woman is. To be honest, I decided to watch this episode because Abbey was in trouble and those are usually my favorites. This time though, Abbey drove me nuts because she talked the entire time with armed gunmen right next to her. Way to stay silent, Abbey.

Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV - once again, a day late.  Things in life should slow down so I should be on time next time.  I don't know about you but my week went well. I'm ever more behind on my shows but of the ones I did watch, they tended to be better than average. No more so than the Show of the Week, Supernatural, with its old school case that felt more like seasons 1-3. New shows were more of a mixed bag, although they all show potential. In keeping with last week's Halloween theme, next week's nominated show is The Vampire Dairies which I don't think I have seen since season 1. I'm sure it has changed a lot in its post-Elena form and since I hate love triangles I can only think that's good. If you would like to nominate a show, please fill out the short, 2-question form below. I will only review a nominated show once per season so there is no need to nominate Nashville, The Americans, or NCIS. I've also decided not to include any show a guest reviewer covers. Other than that, provided I can find it streaming somewhere, any show is fair game - current or already ended. So dust off those old favorites and nominate away. Until next time, happy TV viewing!











NCIS - 13.01 - Stop the Bleeding

NCIS is one of those shows with a formula and that formula has been incredibly successful. After all, it's now in its 13th season and still going strong. Much of that lies in the fact that NCIS is comfort food viewing but it is also a credit to the strong character interactions. That's where my only concern for this episode comes from. Is it just me or does Gibbs seem really off here? Maybe it's because I haven't seen the last 2 seasons but it feels like the best character interaction in here is Gibbs and the new doctor. Not that it's a bad thing because Jon Cryer's comedy kept this episode singing along. I'm just curious as to why there seems to be so much tension between Tony and Gibbs. (Again, watching episodes out of order makes reviewing less easy.) Here's hoping that it's only my imagination or it's resolved soon because those 2 have one of the better faux father-son relationships on TV. As for the comfort food part, this episode hit on all cylinders. There was plenty of action to keep the plot zipping along and Gibbs seeing his daughter was touching. I loved how even she urges him not to live in the past. The humor of Dr. Taft took the place of Tony's normal one-liners although Tony still got a couple himself. Also, there was the Abby-Gibbs hug that always gets me. This team cares about each other and it shows. Therein lies their success because in turn they make the viewers care about the characters.

Grade: B
Ranking - 3, but only because CBS is soooo annoyingly stingy with their material
Audience - everyone who is the audience is already watching NCIS, given it's the mothership of all crime procedurals these days

Best Reason to Watch - there's a lot going on, what with kid assassins and possibly starting WW3
Best Scene - ending scene between Gibbs and Taft
Best Character - Taft, who is a fun new character
Best Awwww Moment - Gibbs sees Kelly
Best Bedside Manner - Dr. Taft, who will keep you in stitches while he stitches you up
Worst Bedside Manner - Vance, who doesn't give Tony anytime to process before sending him back into the field
Most Old School - Dr. Taft's cassette player
Least Surprising - Gibbs puts a pen through the terrorist's hand
Least Smart - delaying for a kid who already took down Gibbs instead of having all of these kids down on their knees and starting to handcuff the would-be assassin / warning the Big Bad that you are there so that he can flee
The "I Don't Get It" Award - Why does Tony seem to think this is all his fault and why does there appear to be tension between Gibbs and Tony? I'm not a fan of tension in the ranks.
The "It's a Conspiracy" Award - everyone is giving Gibbs fruit for his recovery
The Welcome Back" Award (character) - Mike Franks in ghost form
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Jon Cryer, last sent being daft in 2.5 Men / Mimi Rogers from the Tom Cruise heydays / Giles Matthey from 24: LAD / David Andrews from everywhere in another "Hey It's That Guy" performance
Best Music - My Girl by The Temptations
Best Quotes -
1. Tony: "You're not a Bond villain, Daniel. You're a fraud and frauds don't get to speechify like Bond villains. They do get to die like them."
2. Taft: "And could somebody please let Dr. Winthrop know I've requested his company. I've got us a lovely table overlooking Agent Gibbs' aorta."
3. Gibbs: "Things are changing. Can't do it alone." Taft: "I've met your team. Who says you're alone?"
4. Gibbs: "Just following up." Vance: "With your pen stuck in his hand?" Gibbs: "Is that where I left it?"
5. Taft: "I don't know what's got your ticker pumping, Agent Gibbs, but keep it up. You know I'd like to shake the hand of whomever invented the exploding bullet…and then shoot him."





Supernatural - 11.04 - Baby

Metallicar, aka Baby, is the only Winchester who has never let me down and she didn't this time either. Even beat all to smithereens, she still starts when Dean needs her too. Now time to get her some of the TLC she desperately needs. She's a rock star! To be honest though, this episode was deadly dull in the middle in large part because it was told from her point of view. Still it gets the best episode award, and is the best Supernatural episode in a very long time, because it got every other thing right. This episode finally remembered that the whole reason for Supernatural is the Winchester brothers. It was nice to just hang out with them while they were hanging out with each other. We saw glimpses of their everyday life as hunters that we hadn't before and watched them laugh together as well as bringing back the infamous Impala chats. While I prefer laughter over philosophizing, it was a great balance of both and the brothers were as one in a way that hasn't been seen since Carver took over. If it weren’t for Cas annoyingly phoning in, this would have been just like season 1 - which, shockingly, I think the writers have now seen. (Congrats on completing your Supernatural marathon, writers. It's nice that you're caught up with the rest of us now.) At least they had a huge number of callbacks to the earlier, better seasons. In fact, there were so many things that reminded me of SPN's glory days that I eventually lost track. Below you will find all the Easter eggs for me, whether they were on purpose or not. (Yes, I know some of it is fanwanking but it made me happy to think of the better days.) In the end, this episode is made of win for me purely because it brought me back to when I was obsessed with all things Winchester, to the days when a mere TV show changed my life and opened up all the opportunities I now enjoy at SpoilerTV and Southgate Media Group. This is the Supernatural that I fell in love with and devoted all of my time to. This is the Supernatural that is unafraid to take chances, builds on the brother bond, and still occasionally knocks one out of the park. Thanks for the trip down Nostalgia Lane. It's what I sorely needed and it now has me aching for more.


Easter Eggs (not everything and some fanwanking applies):
Previouslies include the Swan Song ode to Baby and Dean convincing John to buy her in "In the Beginning"
Close-up on the interior of Baby shows the same things that brought Sam back into control in Swan Song
Return of classic rock in abundance
Impala chat(s)
Dean's "good times speech" reminds me of "That's fun" from Dead in the Water
Dean smiles at Sam getting some like he does in Provenance
Car singing like Wanted Dead or Alive
Dean calls Sam "Samuel" and Sam corrects him, "It's Sam" like in all those season 1 episodes where Dean calls him "Sammy" to Sam's chagrin
Dean teases Sam about his love life and Sam calls Dean an idiot
Sam talks about wanting a real relationship and Dean says it isn't possible, like a kazillion other episodes in seasons 1 through Amelia
Young John Winchester
Inference to all the times the Winchesters have died
John says he never wanted this life for his sons, which is the same speech he gave Sam in Dead Man's Blood
Dean and Sam have a discussion, disagreeing about religion like in Houses of the Holy
Secrets come out…like every freaking season because they can never be secret-free
"B**.""Jerk." - A brother exchange that we haven't heard since season 2, well at least not to each other.
Dean makes up the creature's name like Jefferson Starships in season 6
Agent Walsh - classic rock names
Dean says he shot the deputy reminding me of when Henriksen shot the sheriff in Jus in Bello
Lilly saying, "Your family, you'd do anything for them, don't you?" is like Michael in Something Wicked saying, "You'd take care of your little brother? You'd do anything for him?"
Sam shoots Baby's window trying to save Dean like Dean shot her window trying to save Sam in the pilot
Impala crash to save a Winchester like the Pilot and Mannequin

Grade: A -

Top 5 Small Brother Moments -
1. Sam calls Baby their home
2. singing Seeger together
3. Dean dreams about a non-hunting John teaching him to drive/Sam dreams of normal life with their mom
4. Sam refuses to say "werepire"
5. Sam tries to take the wheel while Dean's eating and driving

Best Reason to Watch #1 - Forget the 200th episode. This is the true love letter to the fans, full of early SPN Easter eggs, back when Supernatural was at its best. It's like the writers finally watched the whole series and fell in love with the first few seasons like we did.
Best Reason to Watch #2 - all the brother moments, especially the general lack of any other recurring character except Cas' phone calls, which I could have done without
Best Scene / Best Nostalgia / Best Line - After Dean and Sam chat in the Impala, they have the first real "Jerk. B**." moment since season 2. It's a wish list item I never thought would be checked off again. Now for the return of the amulet.
Best Character Interaction - it goes without saying that this one goes to the Winchester brothers
Best Twist - it's Sam that gets some in the Impala / monsters are making an army to fight The Darkness
Best Reaction - Dean to the head still moving so he flips it off Baby with the windshield wipers
Best Visual - the brothers sleeping in the Impala
Biggest WHAT THE HECK!!!! - NO WAY Dean lets some random valet drive his Baby. No way! I call foul in so many ways on this. It's the biggest sore spot in a great episode.
Biggest Huh? - all of a sudden Young John Winchester is in the car talking to Sam and he's NOT a complete douche like later John Winchester, going as far as complimenting the brothers and not being freaked by the idea that Sam is seeing visions
Biggest Product Placement - Netflix
Biggest Huh? - What happened to Dean's "Oh sweetheart, I don't do shorts" line? That's episode #2, baby.
Biggest Creeper - Dean, leering back through the Impala window at Sam's one-night stand
Biggest Thank You - finally someone points out that "God helps those who help themselves" is NOT anywhere in the Bible
Biggest Reveal - Dean dreams of a regular life with John teaching him how to drive at 16, while Sam dreams of a regular life but starring Mary
Most Unique Way to Kill - by car door
Most Reliable Winchester - Baby, who always comes through even when she's all beat up
Least Helpful - John Winchester, yeah I know that's a shocker
Least Likely - a town that small would have valet parking for the restaurant
Worst Plan - Driving around with the Impala's window all bloody. Like the clerk at the motel isn't going to take one look at that and call the police. Do you no longer carry water in the Impala or a rag to make it less obvious?
The "Poor Baby" Award - Baby, who gets beat up worse in this episode
The "About Time" Award - we finally see Sam sleeping in the backseat instead of crammed up in the window, which has to be slightly more comfortable…but not much given Sam's height
The "Back Away Slowly" Award - Supernatural sucks at anything having to do with God, so leave Him out of it and go on your merry way please
The "It Does My Heart Good" Award - I have a soft spot in my heart for Dean taking care of Baby so watching the brothers washing her was a great way to start
The "At Least Spring for a Motel" Award - C'mon Sam. You're the classier brother. No need to have sex in a parking lot when you've got fake credit cards to pay for a questionably clean and interestingly designed motel room.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Matt Cohen as young John Winchester again / Sarah-Jane Redmond, who was also in Changing Channels and Smallville

Best Quotes -
1. Sam: "Goodnight, jerk." Dean: "Night, b**."
2. Dean: "Okay, mom. Let's go home." Sam: "You know what? We are home."
3. Sam: "I tried to give her my number. You know what she said?" Dean: "We've got tonight. Who needs tomorrow." Sam: "Is everything a Bob Seeger song to you?"
4. Young John Winchester: "The Darkness is coming. Only you boys can stop it." Sam: "Okay fine, how? We need help, not visions of dead people."
5. Dean: "Step away from the Netflix."





Criminal Minds – 11.05 – The Night Watch
BY Emma

This week’s episode was all about the case for me. Incorporating the murders into street art in order to discredit a non-violent Unsub was a new one for the series. All of the scenes were beautiful in a dark and twisted way – kudos to the designers for such creativity, the crew for the imagery, and Gibson’s excellent direction for giving it the right feel. Hannibal would be proud. The episode also had some great character moments but with the child abduction and the Unsub’s loss of a child, JJ’s absence was very much felt. There were several moments I found myself thinking JJ would’ve been better suited to handle this situation. It’s been nice seeing the team cope being short a person but I am very much looking forward to her return in a couple weeks. Overall, it was a solid episode but I wish we could get some movement on the “Dirty Dozen” storyline.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch – case of the week
Best Scene – Rossi telling Reid a joke and him totally not getting it
Best Character Interaction – Rossi and Reid
Best Change of Pace – Wheels up in 20, not the normal 30
Best Macabre Use of Imagery – murders incorporated into art, including the murder/suicide
Best Worst Surprise – Tara’s fiancée leaves her, but he’s not killed by an Unsub (yet)
The “Creepy Creeper” Award – The serial killer Tara’s been interviewing getting excited when Tara admits that her boyfriend left and he was part of the reason

Best Quotes:
1. Tara: “Went on a diet last night. Lost 185 pounds.”
2. Tara: “I chose me.”
3. Tara (voice over): “A Spanish proverb says more grows in the garden than the gardener knows he has planted.” ~ this is particularly creepy as it was the voice over leading out of the scene with Tara interviewing the Creepy Creeper



Heroes: Reborn - 1.07 - June 13th Part One
BY Laura Markus

If I'm being fully honest, I didn't enjoy this as much as the previous week's episode. But, that being said, it was still a fantastic adventure. I loved all of the time travel aspects; I loved seeing Mohinder and Angela again; I loved finding out about Nathan (Tommy) and Malina being Claire's twins. I hope Erica and Harris get their comeuppance soon. And how about that cliffhanger? Noah Bennet jumping on Noah Bennet? That's gonna ruin the world as we know it! Hiro was awesome as usual, and Luke and Joanne trying to find Dennis broke me. I have many more thoughts on the episode, but stay tuned for my review later in the week, where I review both Part One and Part Two!

Grade: A+

Best Reason to Watch - Mohinder and Angela return and share an interesting scene.
Best Scene - Hiro reunites with Mohinder and fights the Harris clones, and also says the classic line, "Yatta!".
The "Oh, Cr**!" Award - Hiro stabbing a Harris clone only to be surrounded by more afterwards.
Funniest Moment - Hiro's "Oh, like Harry Potter!", after Noah opens the door.
Weirdest Use Of Time Travel - Hiro practically raised Nathan (Tommy) for 15 years via time travel? That was a bit odd to me.
The "I'm Not Buying It" Award - Claire's death. Nope; it's just not happening, Kring.
Saddest Scene - Molly shouting for Mohinder paralleling Luke shouting for Dennis.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Sendhil Ramamurthy as Mohinder, and Cristine Rose as Angela!



Nashville- 4.06 - Please Help Me, I’m Fallin’
BY Jessica VanWinkle

What an ending! Jeff falling off that roof took me completely by surprise. Jeff Fordham was a complete jerk, but I find myself kind of sad about his death. The one time he actually does something good and tries to save Juliette’s life he ends up falling to his death. I’m worried that this will cause Layla to downward spiral. I think her character has come such a long way, and I don’t want her regress. On the other hand, this could make her become even more likeable since Jeff won’t be around to bring her down. Besides the ending I thought this episode was boring. We had more of the same with Maddie being a brat and arguing with Rayna about everything, Will still dealing with being a gay country music singer, and Juliette sinking further into depression. I really hope that this is the final straw in Juliette’s post-partum depression storyline. She’s completely lost touch with reality: attacking a fan, drinking all day long, and almost committing suicide. And now her illness caused Jeff’s death. I know Hayden is on a break from the show so this storyline has to be almost over. Finally! There were a few positive things about this episode; one of them being Scarlett and Deacon bonding over Beverly (I could have used more of that), and Markus Keen became more tolerable. I still don’t love Markus, but at least he listened to Rayna this week. Overall, I didn’t really like this episode, and I would have given it a lower grade if it wasn’t for the insane ending. It gave me hope for the future, and I can’t wait to watch to see what happens.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch- Juliette sinks deeper into depression.
Best Scene- Jeff tries to save Juliette and ends up falling off the roof.
Biggest Shocker- Jeff dies
Best Actress- Hayden Panettiere. I’m tired of her depression storyline, but I thought her acting was really good this week.
Biggest Brat- Maddie Conrad
Character I Feel Sad For- All of them. This episode was so depressing.
Best Quotes -
1. Gunnar: “It’s what women do. They leave something behind so you’re forced to track them down. Come on. It’s a game.” Will: “No. It was a one night stand.”
2. Glenn: “I know you’re still in love with Juliette, but it doesn’t matter how much you care about her if she doesn’t care about herself.”
3. Luke: “Told you this would be fun. Colt: “Yeah. Hanging out with a bunch of stuffy old people instead of my girlfriend? Time of my life.”
4. Deacon: “How do you feel about ‘The Beverly’?”



Once Upon a Time – 5.05 – Dreamcatcher
BY Missions

After two disappointing episodes, Once Upon a Time finally had a very good one called “Dreamcatcher”. There was only one thing I did not like about it and that was Henry. I do not care about Henry and I do not care about Henry’s love life, even though in the end it played a very important role in the episode. So, the episode starts with a flashback to Camelot many years ago, where we got to see how Merlin is unable to defeat the Dark One and is therefore turned into a tree. I thought the scene was a bit haunting yet beautifully done. In addition to that, in Camelot before the curse, Emma realizes with help of a dreamcatcher that Arthur had cursed Mary and David and thankfully is able to stop Regina from giving them the actual dagger. Of course dreamcatchers overall played a very important role in the episode, hence the title. We also had Henry invite Violet for dinner, however she rejected him. But does she really reject him? No. In Camelot Regina and Emma think of a spell that would free Merlin from the tree. That spell would have to include a tear of someone who is heartbroken. At first it fails when Regina looks into the dreamcatcher and relives the moment that Daniel was killed. Her tear is not enough since she has already moved on with Robin. Shortly after however, Henry, completely heartbroken by Violet, arrives and provides Emma and Regina with a tear. Before Arthur can hinder them, they free Merlin from the tree. At the end of the episode we find out that it was not a coincidence that Violet broke Henry’s heart. It turns out that Emma took her heart and commanded her to break Henry’s. This was something so unlike Once Upon a Time, but I thought it was great. It should be darker more often! We discover this when in Storybrooke, Henry distracts the Dark Swan so that the team could go in her basement where they end up finding Excalibur. The Dark Swan in the meantime was helping Henry find Nicodemus for Violet. Fortunately, they find it and Henry returns the horse to her, which makes her extremely happy. Now Henry was happier than ever, but that changes very quickly when he sees Regina looking into a dreamcatcher that she had stolen from the Dark Swan’s house, where we see how Emma took Violet’s heart. Well, that was it for Henry. In all this madness, we also got to see how Merida, controlled by the Dark Swan of course, is forcing Gold to fight since otherwise the Dark Swan would harm Merida. That was a lot now and usually I would not go into such detail, however in this episode so much happened. I throughly enjoyed this episode and think that it moved the storyline in a very interesting direction. I actually sympathized with the Dark Swan once Regina made her aware of her faults. I know I should not, but behind her evilness, she is still our beloved Emma Swan.

Grade: A-

Best Scene – Emma and Regina use Henry’s tear to free Merlin from the tree. / Regina relives the moment when Daniel dies when she looks into the dreamcatcher. / Regina discovers that Emma took Violet’s heart, which is why she broke Henry’s heart.
The Sympathy Award – The Dark Swan! I know I should not feel sorry for her, but as I said above, behind all that evilness (which is of course not her) we still have our beloved hero, Emma Swan.
The "Welcome Back" Award – Welcome back, Merlin. I already really like him. First, the actor is extremely handsome and second, he will play a very important role in turning Emma back to normal.
Best Character Development – The Dark Swan/ Emma. This episode showed us a whole new side of Emma, a very dark and manipulative side and on the other hand we saw an emotional side of the Dark Swan. Nice observation!
Least Interesting Storyline – While I know it played an important role, Henry’s love life. I really do not care about Henry (in my opinion he is the most annoying character on the show) let alone about his love life. I do not ship Violet and Henry at all!
Character We Did Not See Enough of – Hook! I am missing the old Hook. We hardly see anything good from him anymore. Hopefully, when his father appears on the show that will change quickly. Also, Zelena! I hate the fact that she is having Robin’s child and not having her appear, let alone giving her a proper storyline, does not make it any better.
Most Cringeworthy Scene – OUAT does this very often and it bothers me: When Emma and Regina were trying to free Merlin from the tree, Arthur and his knights hardly did anything to stop them. Why was he just standing there? It makes no sense.
Biggest Question – What happened to Lancelot? Is there a possibility that he is in Storybrooke?
Bittersweet Moment – Cruella’s car was for sale in this episode. How I miss Cruella de Vil!

Best Quotes –
1. Regina: “If I’m the one on the moral high ground, you’ve fallen quite a ways, Ms Swan.”
2. Merlin: “Put it away, Arthur. We both know that broken sword can’t hurt me.”
3. Henry: “Show me that the mom I know is there somewhere.”
4. Emma: “I had no choice!” Regina: “There’s always a choice Emma. You said that to me a thousand times!”
5. Regina: “I thought you could be different. I thought you could escape the darkness, but then you had to go and rip a 13 year girl’s heart out.”



SHIELD - 3.05 - 4,722 hours
BY Swanpride

It is tempting to give Agent of SHIELD a high rating for sheer boldness alone. It is rare that TV shows decide to shake up their proven formula, and this was as far removed (no pun intended) as it can get. AoS is an ensemble piece, so spending a whole hour with just one character goes more or less opposite to everything the show is. The thing is, though, that the whole story about Jemma meeting another stranded man on an alien planet is more or less the most boring option they could go for. In addition, it is at odds with the episodes beforehand. Now that I know what happened, I neither understand why Jemma was sleeping with a shift when she came back, nor why it took her two episodes to say "hey, there is still someone on the planet we need to rescue." It's this kind of contrived drama which the show is usually pretty good at avoiding or at least subverting. Thus said, though, the first part of the episode during which Jemma was alone was outstanding. Once she meets Will, though, the story turned more into the okay territory. Partly because it was predictable, and the show is usually the opposite of predictable. Partly because there really isn't that much to Will's character. One would have thought that after 14 years on this planet, he would have acquired some oddities and strange habits (and a giant vitamin B deficit). But all in all, he seemed to be pretty normal once he realized that Jemma was real. All that said, it was pretty impressive how the show runners worked around the budget of the show and presented the audience with a believable out of space scenario. I just wish that they had offered something a little bit more creative overall, especially after the show runners teased the audience for four episodes straight.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - a bottle episode done right
Best Scene - Jemma "organizing food"
Best Character - Jemma wins pretty much by by default.
Best "Wilson" - Jemma's cell phone (I want that battery!)
Best Effect - the sandstorm looked really impressive.
Most Predictable - Jemma and Will somewhat falling in love with each other. It is kind of the logical outcome if you put two humans in a situation in which they think that they will never see anyone else again. I just hope that the show will address down the line that this is more or less the opposite of a healthy relationship, instead of repeating the fairy tale the media has told for years that surviving extreme situations together is somehow romantic.
Biggest Head Scratcher - Why exactly does Will have a cage in his cave, and where is all the wood in the episode even coming from when there is no sun?

Best Quote:
Jemma: "You're dinner, Biatch!"






Ash vs. the Evil Dead - 1.01 - El Jefe

I have never seen The Evil Dead. I always meant to because I loved Bruce Campbell as Sam Axe in Burn Notice. On the other hand, I'm not a fan of Starz and its dependence on gratuitous…well, everything. In hindsight, it might not have been the best episode to watch while eating either. Still I loved it. I take back everything I said about all other shows. THIS is what Scream Queens wanted to be. It's so over-the-top bad that it is hilarious…and it means to be. This isn’t misplaced laughter. The writers and gore experts want you to be busting a gut while they are busting a 10-ton gallon of fake blood in the most obviously 70's blood spurt way. Nothing about this show is designed to be taken seriously and that's a role Bryce Campbell obviously embraces. He's so hammy he might just oink. I will admit that in the first third of the pilot I was worried that this was going to be downright stupid and Ash hitting on Kelly didn't help matters at all. Then Pablo and Kelly ended up at Ash's house and I fully embraced the camp. If it weren't for Supernatural's ode to the fan, this would be my choice for best show. It won't be for everyone…not even close, but if you love to laugh at ridiculous gore, basement budget special effects, and even more absurd characters, this is for you. It is ultra gory and violent, there's a bizarre love scene for zero reason except it's on Starz, and a bit of language, but the pilot's cheese made up for it for me. Plus, I haven't seen a fight scene more stuck in an acid trip than Ash versus the Barbie knockoff since Dean literally fought the fairies in Supernatural. Too bad there wasn't a microwave.

Grade: B+
Ranking - 5
Audience - anyone who adores camp because this may be the most camp-tastic show ever made

Best Reason to Watch - sheer absurdity of it all
Best House Accessory - the button that springs a shotgun into Ash's hand
Best Flashback / Best Recapitation - using clips from the original movies to fill in newbies like me
Best Lighting - the flashlight spin, which causes a slow strobe light effect
Best Character - Kelly, who kicks butt when not about to be eye skewered
Biggest Huh? - Why are all these people fawning over Ash and covering for him? I don't get it.
Most Interesting Filming Choice - slow mo severed head spin complete with Carrie style blood gush
Most Fun - watching Bruce Campbell getting ready for his night out
Most Moronic - getting high and unleashing evil spirits
Most Cheestastic Moment - Ash unveils the chainsaw and the music makes it seem like a vision from angels
Most Likely to Break the Budget - the 6 billion gallons of fake blood used in this 38-minute pilot
Weirdest Segment - Ash gets beat up by a doll
The "Someone's Been Watching Too Much Exorcist" Award - nice 180-degree head turn, sister
The "Nope, Not on Your Life" Award - I would not have approached that woman under that sheet. In times like these, it's best to make them take off the sheet and slowly turn around. Plus stock up on holy water.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bruce Campbell from Burn Notice / Lucy Lawless from Xena and Spartacus

Best Quotes -
1. Ash: "First thing I've got to do is see a guy about a book. There must be some spell I can say to undo all of this. The other first thing I've got to do is some cardio because my heart is jack hammering like a quarterback on Prom night."
2. Pablo: "It's good to see you, jefe." Ash: "It's good to be back." Pablo: "How does it feel?" Ash: "Groovy."
3. Kelly: "Touch me again and you're gonna need another wooden hand."
4. Ash: "Yo granny, I hope you took your Geritol because it's time to dance."
5. Ash: "Do me a favor, will you? Thank your mother for me. She passed her genes down to you in all the right places." Kelly: "My mother died in a car accident 6 months ago." Ash: "Wow, um, you know in the future you might want to just say, 'Sure, I'll tell her' because dropping a bomb like that on somebody you just met is downright rude."



Supergirl - 1.01 - Pilot

Oh, where to start on this one. How about the cheesy dialogue, the interesting special effects, the snoozeworthy middle pacing, or the too good to be true super powers? I think the biggest problem with Supergirl is actually that it doesn't know what it wants to be. It's a girl empowerment show with a clothing montage that includes hot pants and a main character who may be the shyest, most awkward female in a comic book-inspired TV show since Felicity. When the main character dares to question the sexist name her alter ego is given, the audience is basically told that it is their problem if they find it offensive. Thanks show but I will continue to find it silly. Not that the main character doesn't come off as a girl instead of a woman because she does. The woman role is fulfilled by Alex, thankfully, who is the best character on the show. Kat, Kara's boss, is a Devil Wears Prada clone. Supergirl also doesn't know its tone. We get super emoangsty moments like Alex's confession and the dead mom pep talk meshed with the cheesiest villains this side of Star City. It all comes complete with the type of cringeworthy, cheestastic, moustache-twirling dialogue I'd expect from a Mystery Science Theatre 3000 selection. To be honest, I think Supergirl would be better off embracing the internal cheese and going full-out Adam West Batman. Instead it tries too hard to play the middle ground in everything and as a result, everything feels rather meh. It doesn't help that the show is saddled with the same over the top comic book problems as its sire, Superman. How concerned can you get about a character whose physiology makes bullets no more than gnats and who can gently cradle a plane back to earth? The entire character is one big plot device. That's enough for me to give it a pass normally but I am a sucker for kick butt women and there's far too little sister type relationships on TV. On that criteria alone, Supergirl gets 1 more episode to impress me or else it's off to the Phantom Zone it goes. The bottom line is if you only have time for 1 female comic-based heroine, stick with Agent Carter. She rocks and she doesn't even need the alien powers or the laughable suit.

Grade: C (for potential)
Ranking - 3
Audience – people who don’t have enough comic-book based shows in their TV schedule

Best Reason to Watch - it takes no time for Kara to become a superhero, tell others, and get a costume so the pace at the beginning is awesome
Best Scene – Alex reveals that she works for the task force
Best Action - Supergirl vs. Vartox
Best Character - Alex, who is the brains of the group
Best Character Interaction - Kara and Alex
Best Snark - Henshaw
Best Meta - hiring former Superman and former Supergirl to play Kara's adoptive parents
Best Save - James Olson tells Kat that Kara has a connection to Supergirl and keeps her from being fired
Best Reason to Break Your Anonymity and Go Full On Superhero - your adoptive sister is about to die
Best Twist - Alex's issue with Kara being a superhero is not based on jealousy but because she wants to protect Kara from vindictive aliens
Biggest Oops - Kara's ship accidentally pulled Krypton's Supermax to earth with her
Biggest Fatal Flaw - Supergirl has the same big issue that Superman has. She can do too much with too few weaknesses.
Most "Felicity" - Kara runs off at the mouth constantly and is socially awkward. She also kind of looks like Felicity.
Most Practical Use of Alien Talents - Kara uses her super hearing to know when her difficult boss arrives
Most Emoangsty - Alex's confession
Least Likely to Keep a Secret Identity - standing under a spotlight while people take pictures of you without any kind of mask at all
Least Surprising - James knew about Kara's identity
The "I'm with Kara" Award - Supergirl is a terrible name
The "It Must be about Copyright" Award - this show does everything it can to NOT mention the name Superman. It's all "my cousin" and "the man in blue" and "he" on this show.
The "Well That's Confusing" Award - the Big Bad is Kara's aunt, who is twin sister to her dead mom
The "Welcome Back" Award - Laura Benanti from Go On and Royal Pains / Calista Flockhart from Ally McBeal and Brothers & Sisters / Helen Slater, the original Supergirl / Dean Cain, aka Superman on Lois & Clark / Faran Tahir from Warehouse 13 and Supernatural / Mehcad Brooks from Necessary Roughness / Chyler Leigh from Taxi Brooklyn

Best Quotes -
1. Kara: "I can help you stop them." Henshaw: "How? You couldn't even keep us from capturing you." Kara: "I'm still learning." Henshaw: "Our job is keeping people in the dark about alien life on earth and nothing says covert operation like a flying woman in a red skirt."
2. Kat: "I have a meeting with the board today so cancel sushi with my mother. Oh and cancel my therapist. I won't be needing it if I'm not having lunch with my mother."
3. Kat: "It's not that I don't see your frown. It's just that I don't care enough to ask why it's there."
4. Vartox: "Just because you wear that symbol on your chest doesn't mean you're him. Fighting him would be an honor. Fighting you is just exercise."
5. Kara: "Ms. Grant sent me for layouts and she doesn't like to wait." Jimmy: "Well she can wait a minute." Kara: "Have you met Ms. Grant?"



Wicked City - 1.01 - Pilot

I wasn't sure if this was going to be my show. When it started with murder during oral sex and progressed to necrophilia in the first 7 minutes, I had my answer. But oh, the music is a glorious trip back to my childhood. In fact, the hardest thing about this review was picking the best song. Aside from the overt salaciousness, this story has some good bones to it and the characters are likely to get more multi-dimensional and more gray as the series progresses. The pacing is pretty decent and there is already some twists. It's likely that I will end up hating all the characters but I'm intrigued enough to give them one more episode and see if they tone down the gratuitousness and ramp up the character development. I'm especially interested in why Betty is a sadist. What happened to her?

Grade: C+
Ranking - 3
Audience - anyone into true crime shows and the 80's

Best Reason to Watch - it's a time capsule of all things early 80's
Best Song - This one was tough with over a dozen songs to choose from. In the end, I chose one others probably wouldn't - Crimson and Clover. I am very picky about remakes. If I like the original, I am less likely to like the remake but Joan Jett did a fantastic job with Crimson and Clover, making me a fan of both versions.
Best Scene - Roth searches frantically for Karen in the club and the music and lighting add to the frenetic pace before they go full on slo-mo as Kent and Betty walk out
Best Twist - the drug dealing strip club worker is actually an undercover cop
Best Nostalgia - ALL the great 80's music / all the cool classic cars
Most Intriguing Character - Betty, who is an inner psycho and outside fabulous mother
Least Nostalgic - all the goofy clothes
Least Interesting - all the sniping between Roth and Contreras
Worst Reference - National Enquirer's motto
Biggest Red Flag - when your hook up quotes the Marquis de Sade
Biggest Sign of the Times - I don't know anyone that would leave their little girl with a single man these days. Ah the innocence of NOT having bad news following us 24/7.
The "Once Again, There's No Cone of Silence" Award - nothing like the detective announcing that the undercover detective is a cop on the actual street outside where she works
The "Sorry, I Had To" Award - What's in the booooooxxxxx?
The "Some Warning Please" Award - I don't want to see spiders. Ever. Alive or crushed to death by a psycho nurse.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Jeremy Sisto from Law & Order and The Returned / Ed Westwick from Gossip Girl / Erika Christensen from Parenthood / Jaime Ray Newman from Eureka and one of my favorite episodes of Leverage

Best Quotes -
1. Roth: "Okay, so like the kind of guy who tells a girl what she wants to hear." Karen: "Isn't that every guy on the Strip?"
2. Vicki: "Whoa, you look way to Saturday Night Fever, daddy." Allison: "What?" Roth: "What does that mean?" Vicki: "You need to look more American Gigolo if you're going to the Whiskey so you fit in. Like lose the pocket square." Roth: "Okay, how do you know what people dress like at the Whiskey?" Allison: "Yeah, enquiring minds want to know."
3. Roth: "Uh Contreras, you know what your problem is?" Contreras: "No, but I'm sure you're gonna tell me." Roth: "To me, this girl is a victim. To you, she's a step up." Contreras: "Unless you're wrong, Jack. She's both."
4. Roth: "Well, what do we know? We know he was probably older than Emily because she was looking for someone to give her a way up in the world. Possible military background because of the knots. A real attitude toward authority with the big middle finger he gave us by dropping her body at the cemetery. Some real anger issues toward women, which probably means his mommy didn't give him enough attention so now he cuts their heads off." Contreras: "Aside from the head cutting that could be anyone."
5. Roth: "What a surprise? A murder took place here."
6. Contreras: "Hey Jack, you know as much as I enjoy watching you make eyes with your stripper girlfriend, we should probably get moving. I've got a killer to catch." Gibbons: "So why don't you get back into your car and go do your job because I have a drug dealer to bust and I can't waste any more time on the Dynamic Duo." Contreras: "You're a cop." Roth: "Gonna be lieutenant." Gibbons: "Not if I don't get my supplier's boss so if you do anything to blow my cover and I'll cut your b** off. Understood?"





Fresh Off the Boat - 2.05 - Miracle on Dead Street

Another winning episode from one of my favorite comedies. What raised this episode above The Goldbergs for #1 comedy this week was shockingly Eddie and his friends. Usually they are the albatross bringing the show down but I loved how they all show up to help out Jessica. It's even Eddie and Nicole who save the day, mostly by out-sassing the hoodlums. Talk about a trick and a treat. I also enjoyed the Honey appearance, although it was brief. Watching her try to talk Jessica down had me rolling. Still in the end, it's all about Louis and Jessica. I love how the complement each other so well and the fact that they always have each other's back in the end. It's refreshing to see more comedies take this approach to showing marriage, even if most of them take place in the past.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - the kids were helpful and not obnoxious in this one
Best Scene - the Huang van pulls up to help Jessica defend their land
Best Aim - Jessica
Best Twist - Nicole and friends save the day
Worst Costume Name - A bow-hawk? Yikes! That's terrible.
Worst Plan - buying all the eggs in county
Biggest Ooops - the dozens upon dozens of eggs now broken on the driveway
Least Likely to Take Anything from Anyone - Jessica who isn't about to let some punk kids mess with her house
The "Way to Bend" Award - Louis comes to the rescue and Jessica dons a Mrs. T shirt
The "I'm with You" Award - I hate Halloween too, Jessica. It's my least favorite holiday of the year.
The "Say What?" Award - That house / neighborhood doesn't look like the lower middle class where I lived. Who knew?
Best Music - theme from A-Team

Best Quotes -
1. Jessica: "I hate this holiday."
2. Evan: "Did you get that last part from Field of Dreams?" Louis: "Greatest Halloween movie ever." Evan: "That movie is about baseball players." Louis: "Ghost baseball players." Evan: "Hmmm, I'll allow it."
3. Honey: "I'm Miss Piggy, Kermit's girlfriend." Jessica: "Pigs don't date. Pigs feed a crowd at a reasonable price."
4. Louis: "Don't you want to experience the one thing white people do better than us?" Jessica: "Begging for candy in a disguise to hide your shame? No thank you."
5. Eddie: "The scariest thing to a teenage boy is a teenage girl."



The Goldbergs - 3.06 - Couples Costume

I may hate Halloween but I love the Goldbergs and this is another example of why. First off, Murray does a great job of tempering Beverly's crazy while Beverly gets Murray out of his shell. It makes them one of the best husband and wife duos on TV. (Still miss the Burkes from White Collar.) I love how they know each other so well and love each other so much that they do things they normally wouldn't to make each other's lives better. It's a beautiful thing to watch. Second, I love how the three siblings had screen time this time as well. Facing their fears together was sweet even If it didn't last long. I like it best when the 3 have a plan that they work together. All in all, a decent episode with good laughs, great costumes, and even better heart.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the underlying sweetness to the crazy
Best Scene - the end scene where Murray encourages Beverly to spy on Adam
Best Character Interaction - Beverly and Murray
Best Awww Moment - Murray gets dressed up in a stupid costume to make Beverly feel less alone
Weirdest Moment - Barry fixes Erica's hair by twirling it around his finger
Best Perspective - Murray, who talks Beverly off the ledge
The "Welcome Back" Award - Dana is back…for Halloween? Hmm, but it was good to see her.
Best Music - Shadows of the Night by Pat Benatar

Best Quotes -
1. Adam: "What? You want me to pay money to get tortured when candy is free."
2. Voiceover: "My mom stormed into the dark night to defend our home against Kermit the Frog and Strawberry Shortcake." Beverly: "This is a waste of groceries."
3. Beverly: "What are they doing?" Murray: "Egging our house…which we deserve." Beverly: "This is going to stain our aluminum siding." Murray: "Again, well-deserved."
4. Voiceover: "Growing up, there's a lot to be afraid of but when you know in your heart your family has your back, nothing in life is scary."
5. Kermit: "Your wife's nuts, dude."



Grimm - 5.01 - The Grimm Identity

For a season premiere, not much happens here except a billion recapitations and a lot of characters standing around and wondering what the heck is happening. Just like the audience. Oh and Adalind gives birth for those not counting down the days until she gets killed off. Chavez becomes the cryptic plot device of the night, warning of vague threats that are really, really bad but not giving Nick anything concrete to work with before conveniently dying. So same old, same old there. It would be nice if just once someone would spell things out for our heroes with their last breath instead of using it to tell them how screwed they are. Just saying. She does helpfully give him a chess piece before expiring instead of…say, telling him where Trubel is or explaining who "they" are. Maybe he needs it to complete his set. Basically this episode was all set up for the new Big Bad plot but it was missing the urgency I should feel knowing that all of Portland is about to be invaded…again. More importantly, it was missing Trubel. She makes every episode better. Let's hope it doesn't take long to get her back on my screen. I have a feeling we're going to need her to save Nick and the show again.

Grade: C+

Wish List:
1. Keep Juliette dead! If there has to be a fake death, make it Mama Grimm. She is far too awesome to be killed off in such an off-screen way and she's still the best recurring female on this show.
2. Kill off Adalind
3. Give Trubel a whole lot more screen time
4. Pick up dropped plot points like the keys or go straight up procedural. Either one.
5. Allow Nick to actually be a Grimm, which includes letting him win some fights and not have to be constantly rescued (Check)

Best Reason to Watch - Nick actually wins not one but two fights
Best Scene / Best Bromance / Best Friend - Monroe tries to help Nick with Chavez
Best Action - Nick vs. Chavez
Best Use of Black and White - Nick's dream world
Worst Surprise - no Trubel
Worst Timing / Worst Subplot - Adalind's baby
Worst Plan (episode) - Nick confronts Chavez at home
Worst Possible Plan (writing staff) - There seems to be a lot of hints here that Juliette is not actually dead and that would be the worst thing this show could do. NO MORE JULIETTE!!!
Least Surprising - the one person who knows anything about anything dies before saying anything pertinent
Least Stellar Thing to Do to Your Friends - involve them unwittingly in your kidnapping plan
Most Repetitive - everyone expositing Nick's crazy story and talking about how they don't get it
Most Needing to Take a Breath - Nick and his hyper paced revenge non-plans
Most Impressively Intimidating - Monroe and Rosalee going full woge to get Chavez to talk
Most Likely to Get to the Point - Monroe, who cuts through all the philosophy about truth to ask the pertinent questions like, "Where's Trubel?"
Most Cryptic - Chavez, of course
Most Likely to be Shown in iZombie - What was that claw at the end? It reminded me of iZombie comics.
Biggest Argh - Forcing a redemption plot for Adalind causes my blood pressure to boil. Does no one even remember that Adalind basically mind raped Nick and this after trying to kill him multiple times? Seriously people! This whole thing sucks and if this becomes a canon ship, I give up on humanity.
Newest Slogan - Don't Recapitate and Drive. Thanks for teaching us that one, Nick.
The "Say What?" Award - If Meisner is working with the same group Chavez is, shouldn't he already know Nick is a Grimm? Why would this be surprising news to anyone in that group? In fact, I think everyone in Portland knows Nick is a Grimm. It's their worst kept secret.
The "Oh Come On Now" Award - Is everyone getting stupid on this episode? Hank, you don't need to uncuff Chavez to get her thumbprint.
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Meisner returns - woo hoo! He's working with Chavez - um, okay…

Best Quotes -
1. Monroe: "Well Nick dying would have been horrible too." Rosalee: "What?" Monroe: "Not to speak ill of the dead, I'm just saying better Juliette than Nick. I mean…you know, if it had to be one of them…" Rosalee: "None of this was Juliette's fault. She didn't become a hexenbiest because she wanted to." Wu: "Well she did sort of embrace it once she did."
2. Chavez: "You all know he's a Grimm." Wu: "Oh, we do and we don't like secrets very much."
3. Meachum: "Apparently he's some kind of royalty." Pogue: "If you care about that kind of thing." Renard: "Not really."
4. Monroe: "I've known you as a Grimm longer than anyone so if anybody's gonna believe you , it's gonna be me. Okay, we've been through a lot together and I don't want to see you do something…you know, without me if you really need me."
5. Hank: "I was thinking my partner had gone over the edge. I'm not thinking that anymore."



How to Get Away with Murder - 2.06 - Two Birds, One Millstone

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - so much is going on that the twists just keep coming
Best Scene - the whole end is great but I'm going with Frank's genius plan to take Laurel to meet his family
Best Actor - Frank when Annalise is dying in the hospital
Best Played - Catherine records the students talking about how they think their clients are guilty
Best Liar - Frank, who has an answer for everything
Best Awww Moment - Frank takes Laurel home to meet all of his family
Biggest Manipulator - and Annalise takes back the crown
Biggest Twist - everything at the end
Biggest Creepster - in a house of murderers, it's Wes that is the creepiest of all with his dead eye stare
Biggest Lie - Annalise gives Bonnie the credit for changing Asher's mind and I don't know why but it was nice to see Annalise give Bonnie some kudos for a change
Biggest Say What? - the Hapstall sister is unconscious in Frank's car and he seems to be framing her
Biggest Foul on That Play - Annalise learns about Trotter Lake but we still don't except that it's about rape
Most Awkward - Annalise tries to bring a cobbler after Nate's wife dies
Most Moronic - a murder suspect threatens to kill a police officer while they are working the crime scene
The "It's About Time" Award - at least someone calls out people at a crime scene without wearing gloves
The "Oldest Trick in the Book" Award - having sex with someone to discover their secrets

Best Quotes -
1. Laurel: "I'm over all the secrets. We should know better at this point."
2. Laurel: "You know you become less and less sexy with every new compliment you give yourself."
3. Annalise: "I'll handle him the way I always do. Right now I have to go handle a b**."
4. Bonnie: "Why aren't you on your way to the Hapstalls?" Asher: "Oh you didn't hear? Caleb shot Catherine but not before she shot him and now they're both dead."
5. Michaela: "Okay no, we are not vilifying the people who were brave enough to put their biological kids' needs before their own, thus ensuring them a safe and loving home."
6. Wes: "How is this about me?" Michaela: "Because everything wrong about our lives is about you. You continue to be paranoid and make us all paranoid."
7. Connor: "Less nerd. More information."



Scorpion - 2.06 - Tech, Drugs, and Rock 'n Roll

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the countdown to sure disaster always picks up the pacing
Best Scene / Best Speech - Elia explains that failure is a part of being successful to Walter
Best Kid - Russell
Best Vicarious Shot - Happy punches Toby for being an idiot. She should have punched Walter then too.
Best Reaction - Cade during Paige's shirt scent rant
Best Upgrade - Yeah, yeah, safety features. The real win is that the elevator plays music from your playlists.
Best Save - Paige runs into Smaisley with her car to stop him
Best Retreat - Paige asks Cabe if he smells perfume in Walter's room and Cabe wisely walks away
Best Gift - Happy makes Sylvester a humidor for his comics
Most Ludicrous - Take your pick from anything that happens once the building takes over. Anything. As for me, I choose the idea that the wind whipping around the building would blow Sylvester right off.
Most Reckless - Walter, even before he gets into the building
Biggest Shock - Walter takes Elia's speech to heart and agrees to go to happy hour with Ray
Biggest WTH - Why is Sylvester standing around in the rain instead of getting the door open and fleeing? That seems highly out of character.
Biggest Eye Roll - Paige's jealousy over Walter's "one night stand"
Biggest Douche - Walter walks over Toby's dead body to focus on the server instead after he got Toby killed
Dumbest Show of Independence - basically anything Toby does to try to prove it in this episode
Worst Compliment - wonderful posture / perfectly rounded ear lobes
Worst job Requirement - the employees at the tech company have a chip inserted in their arm to open doors
Worst Plan Ever - I don't care what kind of safety features you have. You always keep real fire extinguishers on hand. Always.
The "Foul on That Play" Award - no fair that Paige and Cabe get to watch Drunk Walter and we only get a tame glimpse
The "Have All Cops Gone Daft" Award - First Tony from NCIS and now Cabe. They both try to apprehend someone in a crowded place by pulling their guns on them from half a mile away, ensuring that they run
The "Finally" Award - Elia gives full credit to the Scorpion team for their work…right before the building goes haywire
The "I Don't Think So" Award - No way the fire department just leaves Sylvester there. They'd have at least let him hang on to the ladder. Annoying plot device is uber annoying.

Best Quotes -
1. Toby: "Alright fake Siri, you made your point. You know I'm not gonna stand here and defend it to you. (pause) It's catchy for one. It's classic coming of age angst, and it reminds me of the summer I made out with Suzie Brennan."
2. Walter: "Oh, you made it." Sylvester: "A bit of a rough landing but I owe you my life, my riches, my firstborn." Toby: "Your comics?" Sylvester: "Not that."
3. Walter: "The next one? You're gonna do this again? This failed." Elia: "Walter, people think I'm some kind of brilliant visionary. The reason I'm successful is because on the heels of defeat, I start all over again. Failure's part of the process. You don't know where you're vulnerable until you fail."
4. Walter: "What if we use the building's smart technology to our advantage?" Happy: "That would be a first today."
5. Walter: "It's a little bit odd that there are billions of modern electronics in this building and we're solving these problems with technology that David used to beat Goliath."
6. Cabe: "It's just a cocktail flu. He's disease free." Paige: "We think."
7. Sylvester: "Now you tell me this isn't just like camp." Russell: "Except for the choking to death."
8. Paige: "It's like he's possessed by some evil spirit…that's in a fraternity."

Thanks for joining The Librarians season 2 roundtable review. Sorry for the short notice but I'm so glad to have you. Simply fill out however many questions you wish along with the mandatory first one. I will post the answers in an article on SpoilerTV and this blog on Sunday by 2 pm CST. Again, sorry for the short notice. If you have any questions, ask in the comments below or tweet me @dahne1 and I will get back to you. Thanks again for participating.